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Married No sex Atrophic Vagina symptoms

Posted , 9 users are following.

cheryl56986
cheryl56986

57 - Sex painful impossible because vagina opening has shrunk also causes severe bladder irritation when attempt penetration.  Has been many years since we have had sex, early on with the disease - problems when having sex were amplified by my husband worried about hurting me - erectile malfunctions - Now My husband is used to masterbation/online porn and when I try other methods to be close it does not work because of his new brain path  - I have lost all desire and hope of being desirable - Is this what your fifties are supposed to be like - I have nothing to guage because people lie about their sexuality - Am I alone?

2 likes, 32 replies

32 Replies

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  • deb27931
    deb27931 cheryl56986

    Posted

    Well if you find it post back cos I and many others are totally fed up with having to have our lives revolving about our nether regions. I feel like I'm getting by but thats about it. 

     

    • cheryl56986
      cheryl56986 deb27931

      Posted

      My whole life has been affected by my nether regions in one way or another - would like to have a break
  • beverly52803
    beverly52803 cheryl56986

    Posted

    Well, I've found one solution but it isn't for everyone...particularly for those who are married. Celibacy. Would have scoffed at the idea earlier in my life, but now it works pretty well. No marital hassles, compromises, etc and the AV  causes no problems. If I were trying to have sex it certainly would. Think the horse is out of the barn with that one.
    • cheryl56986
      cheryl56986 beverly52803

      Posted

      If I didn't have two older sisters polking fun at me all the time I would be totally on board with your philosophy.  Unfortunately they have made me feel that I am being cruel to my husband - 
    • kathleen1958
      kathleen1958 cheryl56986

      Posted

      Tells them they may feel different if it was them. I do feel mean at times but every time I have tried over the last few years it's been so painful we have not tried now for ages.  I am using treatment at mo though so maybe I will try again soon. Xx
    • cheryl56986
      cheryl56986 beverly52803

      Posted

      My husband and I have not had intercourse in years... no sex contact at all this past year due to his online porn
  • rosemary82613
    rosemary82613 cheryl56986

    Posted

    I do feel sorry for as I have the same problem. We were on wonderful cruise

    Sex once, as rest of time too sore

    • cheryl56986
      cheryl56986 rosemary82613

      Posted

      Yes I tried that last vacation - spent the rest of the trip with soreness and irritated bladder
  • beverly52803
    beverly52803 cheryl56986

    Posted

    Cheryl, sounds like your sisters could use a little counseling along with your husband!  If one developed gum disease or bone loss and lost their teeth would it be funny? Tell them to grow up. They are a little old to find a problem funny just because it involves sex. Maybe it's best not to discuss it with them. You've got a lot of women here who can empathize and be supportive.
    • cheryl56986
      cheryl56986 beverly52803

      Posted

      Yes i am tired of feeling abnormal and inadequate. That is why I sought out this wonderful site. I had to believe i wasn't alone ... the way i was being made to feel

      . Look at any sex survey at least in the U.S. and it will tell you women love sex more after 50. Who are they talking to???

  • beverly52803
    beverly52803 cheryl56986

    Posted

    Cheryl, they are probably getting responses from women who aren't having any physical issues and are answering the survey readily because of it. Personally, even if I didn't have AV I could not possibly be enjoying sex more than I did when I was younger. The drive just isn't there. Depending on life circumstances early on, kids, work, stress many people don't have the time, don't have great partners, etc. For some of those folks their sex lives become more of a focus later in life when they can relax.

    Was your husband a good sex partner before the AV developed? If so I can't believe he would just dive into porn rather than try to work out other methods of being physically & emotionally close. People develop all sorts of health issues as they age. You are not inadequate. I'd say the problem is on your husband's end. Put the shoe on the other foot. If he had ED and Viagra didn't help would you do to him what he is doing to you? Guess it's up to you what you are willing to accept.

    • cheryl56986
      cheryl56986 beverly52803

      Posted

      You are right unfortunately society as a whole sees and portrays things differently. My husband was a lazy lover not the initiator things fell apart sexually when he had knee surgery which coincided with my getting severe vertigo plus a succession of deaths in the family and menopause that is when i developed AV. My sisters would tell me if you dont use it you lose it. Guess they were riht
  • yvonne75804
    yvonne75804 cheryl56986

    Posted

    I know exactly how you feel.

    i am going to see my doctor tomorrow to try and get some pessaries containing oestragen.

    i have tried lubricating gels but still very painful.

     

    • cheryl56986
      cheryl56986 yvonne75804

      Posted

      I have orderd the American version waiting for shipment to arrive will keep you posted
    • jayneejay
      jayneejay yvonne75804

      Posted

      yvonne 

      hope you get some sorted ..

      mine i wouldnt be without, takes a while to re plump everything, but they work ..

      i use as i said way above .. ovestin vaginal ovules, they are so soothing, also ovestin cream for outer skin keeps it hydrated, plump, and prevents it thinning and becoming painful .. 

      Gyno said use both .. not forgetting abit of cream around  vag entrance and outer bits, made such a difference 

      good luck 

      jay x

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