Medicated home detox starts tommorrow

Hi Kelly, well done you!!! That's great.

At the moment I'm ok thanks just keeping busy. Reduced Librium again today but craving quite bad. Bad tempered at times too. Positive note, I've not slept so well in months!

I'm just looking forward to being 'normal' again, whatever that is....

My work suffered as did my family so I'm praying I can do this for good this time. My longest without drinking was 6 months...

This is such a destructive addiction!!!

I've also cut back on the baclofen.  And I agree, I haven't slept so well in months either!  It's amazing how alcohol causes insomnia and "more" anxiety!  Funny how you mentioned "normal" because I just brought that up at my last AA meeting.  I don't know if there is a such thing as "normal" for alcoholics but I'm just looking to be happy & healthy.  My work suffered also.  That's why I'm having trouble making an outpatient appointment.  I don't want to lose anymore work.  You can do this!  Just find whatever works for you and use it.  Don't be afraid to go out of your comfort zone.  Not saying you should go to AA.  My example is that I went twice in the past week and was so nervous but still felt better being around people who understood me.  I don't know if I want to be reminded everyday of how messed up I am so I'm going to AA twice a week.  Like I said whatever works!  So, we both have about the same sober time.  That's awesome!  It's a terrible cycle that runs in my family and I'm looking to break it again.  Guess I've beating myself up these past 3 years of drinking after making it 11 years sober.  But, I have to remember relapse is part of recovery and maybe I needed to learn new lessons this time around!  I keep trying to keep the thought in my head not to pick up that first drink.  I'm good at talking myself into it so this time I'm doing all I can to talk myself out of it.  Insanity!  Wishing you the best of luck and keep in touch!

It's funny how you say you don't want to be reminded how messed up you were.... After I did my last detox I stopped posting on another forum I was on as I couldn't deal with reading about alcohol and alcoholism as it made me feel so messed up again.

I've also been told relapse is VERY normal but still makes me feel like complete sh*t and a failure!

I'm hoping I can change that thinking pattern and still use this forum for support and hopefully help others.

Where abouts in the world are you?!

Yes, keep in touch too.

At this point I think we need to somehow keep ourselves reminded.  I just prefer not to be reminded everyday, lol.  I'm in the U.S.  (Pennsylvania). Where are you?  Evenso, we can keep in touch via email if you like or another way that I might need to learn, lol!!!  

I am in the U.K. I understand what you are saying, we need to be reminded so to keep the awful memories there so we know not to go back....if that makes sense?!

Makes a lot of sense.  I just worked 2nd shift tonight and I'm surprised I wasn't going crazy for a drink.  I know I'll have a lot of moments where I want to drink so I'm really going to appreciate tonight for what it is!  How are you feeling??

Brilliant news, Shelley.  

Hold on to the healthy, happy feeling.

Good Luck with the "New You" !

Alonangel 🎇

As regards what you do next, good luck, but do not leave it too long. Because if you want further alternative medication, it isn't just like going to see your GP tomorrow and getting some, it takes time, time when your mind will be thinking about drinking.

If you do seriously consider Campral, then please feel free to PM me. I understand your concerns and dreads about it, I have been there and had to deal with the thought process.

shelley..don't think about the future...just today.

​So glad you made it thru your detox.

Life is so much more enjoyable without alcohol.

 

Thanks Misssy, It certainly is. How are you doing?

 

I'm doing well shelley...trying to focus on the good and when the bad slips in...trying to redirect it.

​Its the simple things such as enjoying a shower....eating a meal....that I am most grateful for.

That's great Kelly. Well done. I'm just a bit frustrated with my mood swings at the moment. I can go from laughing and joking to snapping at people and literally wanting to throw things and screaming. It comes on so quickly it scares me. 😞

Oh, I've been there.  I came home work the other night and slammed things around because there were a few dishes in the sink.  Have you tried journaling, reading positive books, watching positive movies, exercising, any type of hobby?  I don't if you're religious or not.  I've found my faith and praying helps.  And I still cry when I pray.  I think all of this is as normal as it gets.  Try something relaxing.  Are you taking medication or going to AA or doing any outpatient counseling?

I am not religious at all Kelly, I have been reading and have just bought a piece of old furniture to try a little bit of upcycling which i hope will keep me busy... I am on a waiting list for counselling and speaking to someone tommorrow about medication to help with the cravings...

I have an appointment May 2nd for an assessent at outpatient but am still on the waiting list.  I asked why the wait?  What am I supposed to do until then?  Ugh!  I did get medication to help me through the withdrawals but I do need something for the cravings because I was just sitting outside trying to enjoy the nice weather and just got a craving to have a drink.  A nice thought that needed to pass.  Just one of those days

Stay strong! This is the toughest part isn't it?! It sucks at times it really does.

Thank you!  Heading to an AA meeting to see if I feel better, the same or worse.  We'll both get through this!