1. Community
  2. Skin and nails
  3. Psoriasis and Psoriatic Arthritis

My husband is so depressed

Posted , 9 users are following.

paula75423
paula75423

Hi I was just wondering what help there is out there for the depression caused by PA ? My poor husband has been battling with this since 2014, he only got diagnosed in August last year. Today he finally cracked under the pressure, he's been up all last night crying and went back to bed this morning in the same state, he's never been emotional like this. It doesn't help matters when we are battling with the dwp over his PIP entitlement. I just don't know what I can do to cheer him up, I've tried but he's just lost intrest in everything.

2 likes, 21 replies

21 Replies

Next
  • steve43628
    steve43628 paula75423

    Posted

    So so sorry to hear of your husbands depression Paula sad What medication is your husband on for PA ? Is there the same pattern each month when the depression is worst ? Can he get out in daylight to help with the seratonin levels  at this time of year? Getting a plan together  now is where you need to start,because it's going to be long term trying to get the best balance for you both.All the best Paula.
    • paula75423
      paula75423 steve43628

      Posted

      He's on methetrexate at the minute but they don't seem to be helping him, he's had a steroid injection off the gp that hasn't helped, we're waiting to see his rheumatologist again but don't know when that will be. I try to get him to go out in the day but most of the time he won't go because he's in too much pain. This time of year with the weather and dark nights is horrible for us all, but he's never been like this I am really worried about him. Thanks for your reply Steve
  • steve43628
    steve43628 paula75423

    Posted

    Oh right.I thought as such Paula.I had a what's called a  Mepl Medone injection twice.the first time it worked great. Me being a guitarist it so excited me.I forced my rheumatologist into giving me another.It ended up with me not just in a lot of pain,as I have not just PA, but osteporosis,and many broken bones.So pain was bad,but from nowhere depression,not just depression but suicidal depression,Not caring about anything or going out. Coincidence with your husband.I think not.I knew it was the injection,but boy so hard to ride out.Still not fully there,but getting there.I reported it to my GP.I so so pray it's the same for your husband,and he rides it out Paula.It took about 2 months from the injection to calm down,I;m seeing my rheumatologist in february,as I'm not taking anything at mo.Starting to seize up with my hands again sad On the PIP side.Have you  listed  down anything like using a bed to assist in getting dressed,hand rails. Anything like that.I had a PiP interview on 18th Dec,and ended up at Chelmsford for a consultation. Anyway I passed today,having got the brown envelope this morning.If there is anything I can help you with.The PIP form;I had the CAB for help in filling the form out there.I'm here for you.You sound like a wonderful caring wife smile.
    • paula75423
      paula75423 steve43628

      Posted

      He had a Kenalog injection, i don't know if it's the same but it's done him no good at all. I took him out for the day today and we both really enjoyed it, the weather helped though as it was actually sunny for a change cheesygrin. As for the PIP i've done everything i can think of and more, i'm just waiting for an answer to my mandatory reconsideration, which is stressing us both out. He was awarded Mobility at standard rate last year after injuring his back and now the PA has developed they've taken it off him all together ! it's crazy.

      Thankyou so much much for your kind words, it means a lot to have people to talk to 

  • wendy0409
    wendy0409 paula75423

    Posted

    Hi I was diagnosed in November last year. I have been taking methotraxte and it seems to be working some what. My dosage has been increased. I have my days where the pain is crazy. It wears you down. I am also on a depression meds. This time of year is bad for depression I hope your husband gets out of it soon and he can get his pain managed. This disease stinks. Stay strong. Best of luck to you both.
    • paula75423
      paula75423 wendy0409

      Posted

      Hi Wendy thanks for your reply. He was put on methetrexate in august last year, after 14 weeks of being on them his rheumatologist took him off them because they didn't seem to be helping, but while he was off them he felt worse so he's back on them now, he's had to build his way back up now. He's on 20mg again now. I've been reading about people being on biologics as well I think that's what they're called, I'm wondering if and when they will put my hubby on them.

      He says he doesn't want anti depressant meds because he's already taking enough tablets, but I think he needs them.

  • robert271163
    robert271163 paula75423

    Posted

    Hi Paula soory to hear abotu your Husbands depression, I am also on methatrexate it does take 3 months to start working which is a long time when your in so much pain, I also take Sulfasalazine and for the pain Tramadol and co codomol. If the MTX is not working i would contact the Specialist or the Support Nurse they should see you earlier than his next appointment, The pain is the worse bit and like others i have good and bad days, Feeling depressed will not help the pain either when he is at such a low ebb. I have had this for 18 months now but it took them two years to diagnose it so i know where your coming from, I normally find that at the begging of the day it is worse I take my meds which takes time to kick in then i try to be mobile as much as i can be i normally find the pain lessens although sometimes can be uncomfortable. I would consider getting the GP to take a look at the depression side as this horrible condition is there for good its a matter of coping with it as best we can. But be aware he can over do it too I have in the past because the meds are doing the job you dont feel so much pain but when you stop it comes back and normally worse its trying to find a balance for yourself. I hope this helps there are also support groups out there for this condition which could be worth looking in to. 
    • paula75423
      paula75423 robert271163

      Posted

      Thanks so much for your reply Robert, I've read what you have said to him hopefully we'll get sorted today I'm going to phone his helpline number today and see what they say. I'm wondering how long it will take to give him biologics to go with the methetrexate ? He takes Co codamol for the pain, it helps a bit by making him spaced out, but it's ruining his quality of life, I think that's where most of the depression is coming from, because he can't do what he used to do.

      I'm taking him out today as the weather is actually ok at the minute hopefully it might cheer him up a bit.

    • robert271163
      robert271163 paula75423

      Posted

      Hi Paula i hope you both had a good day and my words were helpful to you both 

      best wishes 

    • paula75423
      paula75423 robert271163

      Posted

      Thanks Robert yes we did he actually had a laugh and we enjoyed each others company and yes you've been very helpful 

      Best wishes to you too x

  • stephen54311
    stephen54311 paula75423

    Posted

    Yes I get depressed too its the little things that set you off please don't think it's you its not if hubby is fed up of tablets try asking for injections of methatrexate instead this will at least cut down on tablets but he must at least try to get help it may not be in tablet form ie cbt ( cognitive behavioral therapy ) but this can be a long wait ,funny that we can talk about depression on here but face to face is nearly impossible take care and look after yourself

  • robert271163
    robert271163 paula75423

    Posted

    Your more than welcome, I wish the pain killers done that to me sometimes but even Tramadol rarely touches me I am still able to drive and even ride a motorcycle, I did have to reduce the Tramadol as it was effecting my memory which is a classic side effect of that drug I also altered when I take them to benefit me more but this was all advised by my Specialist nurse. There are so many medications to control this it is hard and very long winded finding the right combination for everyone reacts differently to all the drugs they have. No help I know but there are so many things  they can use. I was given a week intesive care in hospital with Hydrotherapy, hot wax treatment and gym in Hospital it was great while i was there and the pain really went but three days after it had finished I was in more pain than when it started. Hydrotheropy can help the pool is heated to 33 deg, might be worth asking it if is available, it will also help get your husband out for a while. 
  • Lainey8
    Lainey8 paula75423

    Posted

    Hi Paula. I'm so sorry that your husband is struggling so much. It can't be easy for you either. I got diagnosed last February with PsA. I battled on with work as I was determined that it wasn't going to affect my quality of life. I started on methotrexate in June. By October I was a wreck. I was constantly in pain, fatigued and had developed an anxiety disorder. I have been signed off work since then. I have been seeing a counsellor and it's the best thing I could have done. He has changed my outlook and I am finally feeling more like me again. I still have my moments and am still unable to even manage a walk around the shops without being left in pain, but it does get better. My counsellor said that it is so important to let yourself be sad about what's happened. He said I needed to grieve for the old me, as my life would now be taking a different course and wouldn't be the same again. You can't grieve unless you allow yourself to feel sad and upset. I have also been given strategies for my anxieties. Your husbands doctor should be able to refer him. It really did make a huge difference to me. I dont know when my meds will start to work properly and when I will start to get better, but I do know that I am not alone and there are lots of people on here who will be ready to offer support, advice and a shoulder to cry on. Your husband is very lucky to have a wife who is obviously very supportive. Someone on here previously said to me that the light at the end of the tunnel hasn't gone out, you just can't see it yet! Take care xx
    • paula75423
      paula75423 Lainey8

      Posted

      Thanks so much for your help and advice it means a lot x
    • sheila65847
      sheila65847 Lainey8

      Posted

      Hi Lainey,

      how are you? When do you start your new job? I'm wrecked at present, 100 year old body, the pain is horrendous. I'm on the reduced amount of Pred, how I wish it could be the higher dose which made me feel better and happy! I had 2 days in London last weekend, the Pred got me through that but gosh, I'm suffering now. I don't know what to do; iI get worn out repeatedly saying I'm fatigued and in dreadful pain, I feel like a record stuck in a groove! I get my 2nd shot of Stelara next week so hopefully that will help. It's a beautiful day so I must go out for a hobble around the garden, best wishes, sheila xx

    • Lainey8
      Lainey8 sheila65847

      Posted

      Hello Sheila

      Thats great that you managed a couple of days out in London! Its awful to suffer after, but sometimes its worth it (especially when you suffer all the time anyway)! I am off my Pred now and am back up to 20mg of Methotrexate. Still taking tramadol and gabapentin. I know what you mean about saying the same thing over and over! I have tried to stop saying it, but its hard when people ask how you are isnt it. Mind you, I think most people can tell how I am by just looking at me! I look shattered and hobble like an eighty year old! ha ha. 

      I have requested that I change my rheumatologist. I dont feel like he is very supportive. I needed help as my back pain has been awful and everytime I try to walk my legs seize up and feel tingly. My previous consultant said I had PsA and probable AS, but this consultant said it cant be AS, as my MRI is ok. I have read that 30% of people with AS, have a clear MRI and I also was told that I fill the criterea for it. Am waiting to be transfered. The HR department at work have been really helpful and they are sending me to one of their doctors. They said I am still not fit for work sad . Am feling very much in limbo at the moment and am quite frustrated with it all. On the positive side, I have had a good day today and made it out to the shops with my Mum. Shall cross fingers for good news after your second dose of Stelara xx

Back to top
Next

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.