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My story its very open with vile intrusive thoughts

Posted , 7 users are following.

Kayleigh0910
Kayleigh0910

PLEASE NO JUDGING!

so heres my story sorry it might be long, Around 4/5 weeks ago i had a trivial memory come up from when i was 10years old and me and two girls abit younger touched eachothers bits (laughingg and giggling) me and my brother used to rub up and down each others legs aswell etc this has came back now and made me have very bad gad (anxiety)

So 3 weeks ago my doctor gave me sertraline ive done 1 week at 50mg and 2 at 100mg and today is starting my 4th week on 100mg

i see my doctor today and cbt telephone tomorrow but on sunday (3days ago) ive had an intrusive thought about touching my 5year old sons bits, i would never do it i bath him change him etc but would never touch him in that way it mades me highly anxious, scared, shakes and sick that this thought has come and keeps coming back althought sometimes i can ugnore it and it goes quicker, I love my children and would never hurt them but this was disturbing anyone have any advise and if youve had it how long till it passes?

Been to see my doctor today who said this can happen with anxiety and there thoughts and not actions and id wouldnt act on them so they should pass, also cbt will help withthese thoughts and they can disgnose and the have doctors who can help

So sorry its so long just wanted to see if anyone had the same its so hard to put this out

0 likes, 29 replies

29 Replies

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  • Dav39
    Dav39 Kayleigh0910

    Posted

    How are you feeling now Kayleigh? Any better?
    • Kayleigh0910
      Kayleigh0910 Dav39

      Posted

      Hi dav yes had some quite good days thoughts have gone for few days now although sometimes i find myaelf thinking about the thoughts, past 2 days my anxiety has gone up again so going to phone my doctor today and see what she thinks im still on 100mg but waking up with heightened anxiety again
    • Dav39
      Dav39 Kayleigh0910

      Posted

      The good days that you're having are a good sign I think !

    • Kayleigh0910
      Kayleigh0910 Dav39

      Posted

      Yeah i had a good few days but past 2 days anxiety is high again docs going to increase me to 150 next week, shakes have returned with the anxietybaswell this morning but have to take my cat to vets today as hes poorly so it could be because of that
  • olivia09590
    olivia09590 Kayleigh0910

    Posted

    Hi Kayleigh, your story is very similar to mine and you are not alone. I'm 21 years old and I've been on medication since I was 16 for similar reasons like yourself. I was first on citrolpham and two years ago they moved me into setraline 100 mg. i find it's incredibly difficult sometimes being able to function properly on a day to day basis. The medication will cloud our thoughts, I've had some pretty worrying strange ones myself. I have dreams and I believe it's happened... like a couple of nights ago I must of had a dream that Connor mcgregor and floyd mayweather had their fight and Connor lost .. I thought this actually happened .. now when I started talking to my colleagues about "the fight" (that hasn't even happened) this is just an example of many of things that I've dreamt about and I thought it happened in reality. It was embarrassing and it makes me feel like an idiot. I have had violent and terrible thoughts also, and I do believe it's the medication that causes these.

    • Kayleigh0910
      Kayleigh0910 olivia09590

      Posted

      Olivia that sounds awful!

      My thoughts have got better and rarely have them now, ive had a fair few good days but last 3 days including today ive had heightened anxiety so doc wants to

      Up me to 150mg next week, i have weired dreams aswell but can cope with them as i no its not real, i think its possible the medication xan cause this aswell.

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