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Orgasm After Prolapse Surgery

Posted , 37 users are following.

rachel_52861
rachel_52861

I've had surgery for a posterior and anterior repair with perineoplasty on the 6th Feb (almost 3 weeks ago) and was told not to have sex until 6 weeks. I never really considered that no sex would mean no orgasms at all so I never asked about it, I was just thinking I wouldn't want intercourse anyway until then or after anyway so it's not an issue. Now my husband is adament that I shouldn't do anything at all for 6 weeks that may lead to an orgasm as it could pull the internal stitches. I've searched the internet for answers but there doesn't seem to be any. I've found some old forum threads and only one which states her surgeon said no orgasm until 6 weeks, other than that nothing so does anyone know if it is safe or not?

6 likes, 55 replies

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  • Jan999
    Jan999 rachel_52861

    Edited

    Obviously penetrative sex would be painful and very risky before 6 weeks because there would be a risk to you, you could end up with burst suture line and your partner could suffer with a very sore penis. However what is to stop you having an orgasm? In fact it could help your recovery. It could give you a feeling of wellbeing and the increased blood supply to the vulval area could improve circulation therefore help healing. Just be careful.....no penetration.
    • susan49311
      susan49311 Jan999

      Posted

      Have you had any replies from women who had successful orgasms before the 6 to 8 week period for penetration?
  • Thetis8489
    Thetis8489 rachel_52861

    Posted

    I am not A doctor , however I would recommend no orgasum either because you will not only add more moisture their is the contraction's and dilation which happen's during arousal and orgasum until after you have your checkup or all your suiture's are gone .Again I am not A doctor . I have had both A rectoseal and A vaginal prolapse repair . I was told after the First the rectoseal nothing for 8 week's and with my vaginal prolapse repair I was told nothing for 12 week's I had different surgeon's both time's .

    • Jan999
      Jan999 Thetis8489

      Posted

      There's no reason why an orgasm can cause problems. Penetrative sex following a rectocele and cystocele repair isn't recommended but there are other ways to achieve orgasm. 

  • Jan999
    Jan999 rachel_52861

    Edited

    rachel I apologise, your post has been invaded so to speak. You can always send me a personal message if I can help but rest assured what you read was as you said an old forum thread and we know things are very different now and we are much wiser x
    • rachel_52861
      rachel_52861 Jan999

      Edited

      No need for you to apologise Matro, I knew this post might lead to some personal comments being made but I wanted it out there for other woman to read so that they could find something current and make their own decisions about it too.

      One thing that led to this post is that while searching the internet to find out if it was okay or not I found an article.

      The lady that wrote it, talks about the fact that she had a hysterectomy plus two prolapse repairs, that she could not have been happeir with the results of, but she could not get anyone to talk to her about how she would regain her sexual functioning. She then talks about a friend with prostate cancer who was given advice, reading material, access to support groups and classes for sexual partners telling them what to expect. She said that it was obvious that despite the aggressive nature of his cancer, restoring his sexual functioning was considered a goal of treatment. With this in mind she had expected that hers would also be a high priority.

      Having read this I thought about my own advice and have to admit that I had a fantistic surgeon who did consider my sex life and need for one throughout. However, probably still not as much as he could have but maybe more than a lot of them do. Your comments regarding blood flow to the area is extremely useful to know and I believe this to be true but shouldn't there be some documented research about it somewhere? Research on womans sexual functioning after surgery, i.e. can a womans ability to orgasm be affected and their g-spot since major work is going on internally near that area? I read a few fears that it could be but I had never considered it and don't know that there is any truth to it so don't want to worry anyone, but how do we find out for sure?

      With regards to penetration, I doubt I'll be ready for that until well after 6 weeks and we had been having some difficulty in that area for the past 10 years so we can wait as long as we have to for me to heal - hubby is patient and understanding so no problem there. We have got used to other methods and I see no harm in using them if I am feeling able to and it won't harm my stitches. I was told no pelvic floor exercises until 4 weeks because they could make me sore and put me off doing them again if started too early. If I orgasm and feel sore then perhaps I won't do it again for a while but I guess I'll have to try it and see. 

      Thank you very much for your feedback and your defence. For woman, our sex lives do seem to get harshly judged by both men and woman but I am not ashamed of the fact that I may enjoy an orgasm within the next week or two and I know from what I have read that many others would as well at this point after surgery. We don't need to ignore our sex drives and I certainly won't especilly since I have felt broken for 10 plus years, lost most of my sex drive in my early 20's and now have possibly got that back.

      Emis Moderator comment: I have removed the link(s) directing to site(s) unsuitable for inclusion in the forums. If users want this information please use the Private Message service to request the details.

      http://patient.uservoice.com/knowledgebase/articles/398331-private-messages

    • rachel_52861
      rachel_52861 Jan999

      Posted

      I've just put a lengthy reply on here Matron but it is waiting to be moderated - I think because I put a link to an article so hopefully they will let it through.

    • Jan999
      Jan999 rachel_52861

      Edited

      rachel what a lovely post and you have certainly done your research and I've learnt something from what you have said. I am pleased your consultant took into account your sex life and how important it is. I have said on this forum thatva good urogynaecologist will always consider this and discuss it openly. If he/she doesn't then I think it should be brought up by the patient. It's not going to cause embarrassment in any way after all they've heard it all before. Discussing this can lead the consultant to possibly tighten the vagina which is important for menopausal woman in particular. 

      I am pleased you feel it is something you can discuss openly here, that's the good thing about us remaining anonymous although I get the impression it wouldn't bother you which is great. Sex is very important for a lot of women and if these brilliant urogynaecologists can help than we should be thankful. If you have found a link that is useful and interesting you can always send it to me by private message. Please take care and keep in touch x

    • edith-
      edith- rachel_52861

      Posted

      Hi Rachel, I agree with Matron, what a great post. I'm sorry that you had that awful judgemental nonsense aimed at you. 

      There's another thread going on regarding advice re sex during recovery and it seems from both your experiences that there needs to be an update regarding the guidelines that we're receiving. It's a very narrow and rather male-centric view of sexual expression and unfair for us to be left worrying about what to do regarding something so fundamental to our identities because it's maligned in our aftercare. In preparation for my (posterior) repair, my consultant didn't originally question anything regarding my ability to have a fulfilling sex life nor what the possible impact of the repair would be on that facet of my life.

      It is good to hear that some patients are receiving holistic care - it shows that it's possible! My partner unfortunately had a spinal injury resulting in paraplegia; whilst his sensation and function will not return, we have however been able to find a way to express our sexuality and intimacy with each other. There were obviously ups and downs to the relearning and refinding process, but I hope that it provides you with some comfort that we were able to enjoy that process as well. It wasn't always a heartbreaking reminder of what is used to be, whatsoever. It sounds like you and your husband have already experienced a similiar reworking of things and I wish you well as you continue to heal and feel better. x

    • tara04809
      tara04809 rachel_52861

      Posted

      Hi Rachel,

      I have just found out that my bladder has prolapsed and I require surgery. I am 29 years old with 4 children and about to make a big move to a rural town so hoping to get my surgery bopked in as soon as possible.

      I am hoping you can give me some advice, information etc on the surgery and recovery time as well as what sex is like afterwards. I am really starting to worry about it all but also want to get it sorted as soon as possible. I am a bit devastated about it all

    • charlene51019
      charlene51019 edith-

      Posted

      Hi Tara maybe I can help as I am currently 7 weeks post op and I had my bladder bowel and womb done also have my perineum rebuilt. I have 3 children aswell and I am 29. What questions do you have? X
    • denise53580
      denise53580 tara04809

      Posted

      tara04809

      go to "mumsnet.com" ask question, so many woman on this site.. also, heads up, im 11 days post bladder lift rectocel surgery...NO LIFTING for quite a while.. rectocele was harder revovery than bladder lift.. definitely have help with kids the first 2 weeks or do

  • DorryC
    DorryC rachel_52861

    Posted

    SInce orgasms do cause pelvic floor muscle contractions, I would think that you would need to wait until kegels are allowed.  My doctor didn't want any exercises, including kegels, in the first 2 weeks.  I think some ladies are told to start them right away.  Did your doctor say anything to you about kegels?

    I was definitely ready for external stimulation before I was ready for penetrative sex.  I wasn't ready for that at 3 weeks but that's great that you are feeling so well this early. In your situation I think I would feel around, gently, to see how tender things are before trying anything with my husband.   If it hurts to get gently bumped, it may be too soon for your husband to touch you.

    Matron - would an external vibrator be allowed?  It seems like that would make it much easier to have an orgasm without chins or fingers bumping tender bits.

    • Jan999
      Jan999 DorryC

      Posted

      I didn't recommend penetrative sex in fact I mentioned twice that it shouldn't be attempted but I was trying to sensitively indicate something like a vibrator gently massaging the clitoris would be ok. Being a nurse I worry about offending ladies so Dorry someone like you is refreshing to be honest. If I was discussing this on a medical/nursing forum I wouldn't worry about being so open but I'm more cautious here. I have since Emailed a friend of mine who is a urogynaecologist and he said women having an orgasm following prolapse repair won't cause any problems as long as it doesn't involve penetrative sex before 6-8 weeks. I asked his advice because it had been questioned by Thetis and I always worry that I am giving incorrect advice. You are right chins and fingers bumping tender bits should definitely be avoided x

       

    • DorryC
      DorryC Jan999

      Posted

      I didn't think you were recommending penetration at 3 weeks  - sorry my message sounded that way.  I wasn't ready for any kind of orgasm at 3 weeks, that is what I meant.  I was bleeding, sore, and tired.  Once I was feeling more normal, though (past 6 weeks) I was ready for external stimulation long before penetration sounded pleasant.

    • Jan999
      Jan999 DorryC

      Posted

      I knew you didn't think I was recommending penetrative sex, just me reinforcing the issue I suppose. I have seen patients return via A&E following early sexual intercourse. I wouldn't have been ready that early also but obviously some women are x

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