Ovarian Cyst 23 cm ( 9.5 inch )

I have been following these forums for a while, 10 months to be exact, as I have a 10.5 cm simple cyst on my right ovary and a 9.5.complex cyst on my left ovary. These cysts were found in July 2013 via trans u/s after I started experiencing pain and heaviness on my right side. I was first told I had a uti, but when the antibiotics didn't help, I went back to the e.r and that is when they did the ultrasound. The ultrasound only found the right simple cyst at first and I wasn't too concerned being that I have PCOS (which usually only causes small cysts)- I just assumed that my poor diet since having my daughter in 2010 cause one of those cysts to get out of control. Anyway, I went to my regular gyn and he felt it was no big deal. I am only 34 (33 at that time), but he decided to order a CA-125, an he4 and a ROMA (risk of ovarian malignancy bloodtest). I also had a pap. Well, my pap was abnormal for the first time ever, so I immediately booked an appointment at Moffitt Cancer Center with a gyn onc (I am in the states) for the cervical issue. While at that appointment in Sept 2013, I mentioned my ovarian cyst, my dr reviewed the ultrasound that was sent over from the e.r and she eas not worried about it at all. We then set an appointment for me to have my cervical pre.cancer removed. On the morning of that prpcedure, she had me do another ultrasound and after my cervix was taken care of she gave me the results of the u/s and it showed an 8.5cm complex cyst on my left ovary and the radiologist stated that it looked like a dermoid. At that point, she told me I needed to remove it as dermoids do not go away on their own. During this time, my blood work came back and it was all normal. So, in Sept we scheduled surgery for December. 

I have never had surgery before and the idea of it scares me to death. I am terrified of anesthesia and I have gained so much weight since having my daughter, it makes me worry even more about my body being able to tolerate the surgery. Before my surgery was to take.place, my dr wanted me to have another CA-125 in November. I did and those test results were also normal. Between finding out I had these cysts and November my symptoms were: bloating that comes and goes but is always worse before and during my period, excessively hungry, heaviness in pelvis, on and off sharp pains in my pelvis, some back pain, gassiness, and some cramp like pain in the area above my belly button. No matter how many times my dr told me she did not think I had cancer, it didn't reassure me and I am a single mom to a 3 year olx.nd have very little family. I was terrified of not watching her grow up, etc. I could not handle the thought of being put to sleep and either not waking up, or waking up to be told I have cancer. So, here is where I get ridiculous. I cancelled the surgery that was scheduled for December. In all, I cancelled it 4 times all the way into February with the last time involving me literally running out of the hospital with nurses chasing me. I know, the most ridiculous thing you have ever heard, right? In between my cancellations, I did have another u/s in late January that showed nomsognificant change. The cyst on the right still appeared simple and the same size and the one on the left was now 9.5 cm. The radiology report stated there was no blood flow to the left cyst, that it was complex solid and fluid no papillae or nodules and that his impression was still either a dermoid or hemorrhagic cyst. Nothing about malignancy was on the report and I had no ascites. 

I ended up changing doctors in March because the one I was seeing messed up a few things with my cervix and also wanted to do a vertical laparotomy insgead of the key hole she originally wanted to do. Anyway, I have a new dr and he is great! He was not too concerned about the cysts and feels they are not cancer. He is going to remove them via robotic assisted laparoscopy, which is nice... Of course, he cannot say for sure that the left cyst is not cancer, but he truly beli3ves it is not based on what he saw on my ultrasounds and the blood work, etc. He said he thinks worst case will be a borderline tumor. So, I have to put on my big girl pants and have this done and I am absolutely beside myself. I have 100% convinced myself this is cancer and I have been torturing myself over this for 10 months. In the last few weeks I started having routine diarrhea and now sharp pains up into my left rib cage and it is making my worry and anxiety worse. I have read every single forum, article, website that talks about ovarian cysts, in fact worrying about this cyst has taken over my lofe and I am worried to the point that I cannot do much else but worry. To be put to sleep knowing that you could wake up and have someone issue a time limit on your life is excruciating...... reading all of your positive stories has helped a lot. I search for stories that are like mine and end well; it gives me a little bit of hope.....