Pet Names for our PMR?
Posted , 13 users are following.
I ran into a friend yesterday that I hadn't seen for 6 months and she asked me how I was feeling. I started my sentence with "My stupid polymyalgia..." I realized afterwards that I never just refer to it as "my polymyalgia", but always preface it with "stupid". Made me laugh when I thought about it. I guess it's better and more socially acceptable than calling it my "f-ing PMR", which is what I really think of it! lol Just for a fun discussion today that doesn't revolve about the painful aspects of our "stupid PMR", do any of you have little pet names for your PMR??
1 like, 28 replies
constance.de VickieS
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pat38625 VickieS
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tina-uk_cwall VickieS
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Dinah54 VickieS
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VickieS Dinah54
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FlipDover_Aust Dinah54
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constance.de VickieS
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Mrs.Mac-Canada VickieS
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I'm sure most of us have used many different expletives to describe our PMR. Certainly some that can't be repeated here🙊🙉🙈
When I'm having a lousy day I use; my master, pain in the butt and a couple of other not so polite words 😡😈
I'm looking forward to hearing some of the British terms. They are fun😀.
Hugs and thanks for the break.
Diana🌸
julian. VickieS
Posted
But I have to mention it. My condition that is. Lest people misinterpret my behaviour. I suspect they may see screaming with no apparent cause as not quite normal. I wouldn't want them to think my condition was terminal or anything too bad. Just that I'd like them to understand, or at least accept, the limitations my condition places on my daily life. I feel I owe them an explanation other than "leave me alone, it hurts".
Giving it a name seems a bit like playing medical one upmanship. My condition is one of the few disease related conditions that doesn't have a popular name, if popular is a term that can ever be applied to any condition. Its either a meaningless three letter acronym of alphabet soup or some fancy sounding latin sounding name. Its not as if its well known, where a single word conveys a wealth of meaning. It was so much easier when I could say "my back hurts".
So, not being competitive, I tend towards the amorphous and mysterious "my condition". A bit like a female condition from a bygone era, except I'm male and its now. I can dine out on "my condition" without ever giving it a name. Without ever knowing if people are too embarrassed to ask or whether they are totally disinterested and bored with my condition. Maybe they wish I would go away, along with my condition. Maybe they want one too.
I have to mention my condition early in the dining experience lest someone with a worse condition is present. My bygone age dinner table etiquette suggests that "me too" can be socially inappropriate. "My condition is quite painful" displays appropriate English reserve while allowing for the really unwelcome response of "I have two weeks to live". Difficult to then say "my condition is really quite painful". Equally it prevents the rather mundane "did anyone else get a paper cut today" beloved of those who wish to establish their important status as an office worker in a wanabe paperless office.
Its too easy to degenerate into the Monty Pythonesque cycle of one downmanship. "I caught a cold while washing dishes" sounds so much less romantic than "I was struck down by my condition while climbing Everest" which can only be surpassed by the colonial sounding "when I was in ...." and the highly improbable "I broke 47 vertebrae in my head while making an attempt on Icarus' world solar hanggliding freefall record".
So, with just the right amount of almost embarrassment and a hint of unmentionable mystery, designed to convey an impression that its as serious as people like to think it is, it remains "my condition".
Occasionally I get exasperated and frustrated. Then it becomes "the condition". I really would like to give it to someone else. They can keep it, Its a present. Not a boomerang. I don't want it back. I know that's unkind and uncaring. But they should take my condition seriously. They obviously haven't an ounce of sympathy in their bones and deserve it. Its their own fault. Though of course I haven't done anything to deserve it. My karma has always been good. Don't they understand how long I've suffered and thus deserve to be rid of it.
Anthropomorphising my condition is one step too far for me. People are silly, people are stupid. Especially those lacking sympathy. My condition simply is. Though sometimes I think its cunning. It lies in wait, lulls me into a false confidence conjuring up images of leaping tall buildings in a single bound, only to be brought crashing down in a crumpled heap by the evil condition before even leaving the ground.
I've tried many ways of ridding myself of my condition. Enough to inspire Lady Macbeth's "Out, damned spot! Out, I say!—One, two.". But never with the apparent compulsion of rubbing away at one's hands. And fortunately never with the darker suffering of the good Lady. This damn condition of mine is invisible, it can't be rubbed out like pencil lines on paper. Why can't they see that?
Ignoring the damn condition didn't work. It only got worse. A bit in my face really, to borrow a metaphor from an alien culture. Waving my magic wand didn't work either. Though come to think of it, the wand never worked on anything. Worth a try, but no "eat your heart out Harry Potter" for me and my condition.
I don't think I'll ever see my condition as a pet, requiring a pet name. Its more of a blight on the landscape of my life. Something evil, to be cursed roundly. And sometimes loudly. A bit like a never ending earthquake uplifting my landscape so the roller coaster becomes ever steeper and less inviting. I shan't surrender and venerate it with a name.
For sale. One f*****g condition. One careful owner. Cheap or best offer. Free delivery. No warranty. No return policy.
Sorry - the damned tablets made me do it ......
pelham29972 julian.
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I would like to read more of your writing as it lightened my afternoon!!!
Being newly diagnosed and having trouble remembering whether it is poly, mono, uno, bi- or perennial myalgia bifurcitis, bicentennial, bifida, or whatever, I think it will be easiest for me to say that I have PMR, although I would expect most people to think I am taking about PMS. Just like my rheumatoid arthritis which everyone shrugs at and remarks , " Yea, so... everyone gets arthritis (osteo) with age." Using the abbreviation RA sometimes stumps them into the understanding that I am talking about that sometimes "crippling disease". Not that I need to one-up or try to make folks feel sorry for me. It just gives me a handle when I decline invitations to go horseback riding or learn slalom skiing!
Danrower julian.
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Such a pleasure to have you do the heavy literary lifting, Julian.
Thank you.
VickieS julian.
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FlipDover_Aust julian.
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lol
julian. FlipDover_Aust
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"is it your turn to make tea tonight?"
"I think my condition has got a bit worse and I'm so tired, would you mind?"
"well I think my poly whatsit is having a bit of a flare, could you possibly?"
"but that's what you said last time and my damn condition really is worse, are you sure you can't?"
"I know dear, but my f***ing poly flare thingo really is bad, it would be nice if you could"
"you always think your poly dramatica is worse than my condition, I've had my condition longer, its about time you made tea"
"always excuses, if you've had it longer it should be better, you never do anything around here"
"and don't blame it on the tablets again"
............
"alright, which of us will go get the fish and chips, I think its your turn ........
VickieS julian.
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julian. VickieS
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he/she/they/it/us/*** who laughs last longer laughs last longest ......
longer than the condition one hopes!