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Ever since I was a young teenager I have suffered from anxiety and panic attacks. Usually from worrying about my health. Now I'm in my 20's and things are different. About a month ago I had a really bad pabic attack. Afterwards for weeks my anxiety was constant. I couldn't eat or sleep. I literally was scared i was lising my nind. I Google all these mental illnesses that only made me feel worse. Now it's at the point where I'm questioning everything. I have really bad derealization. My mind is racing non stop with random crazy thoughts. Like thinking what if the world and everything around me is in my imagination. Everything feels so unreal and sometimes it feels so real that things around me aren't real. These thoughts race through my mind all day. It's like i feel anxious being alive. I question things like why I'm I here. Why do I exist. I'm not suicidal or anything just very anxious. I always fear im going to lose control and go insane or do something embarrassing like freak out. Everything just looks so weird to me. Like everything! When I talk it doesn't even feel like me. I've read a lot about this stuff but now it's pretty severe this time around. I've spoke to a phsycologist and phsycatrist. Has anyone else had these thoughts? Also lately random memories keep popping in my head from like years ago. It's like my mind is on overdrive going through memories and random thoughts. It's so weird. I feel like im trying to act normal but in the inside I'm feeling insane. The racing thoughts about existence and life and space etc. Is what bugs me the most along with the derealization. They just never stop. When I talk to people it feels like they almost aren't even rea . Has anyone ANYONE dealt with this? I read about solopism and it freaked me out so now I've been obsessing over that! I feel like im going to be stick like this forever.
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