Please help! Newly diagnosed with uterine fibroids

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hi everybody I’m new to this site and this will be my first post. I really need some advice/tips/ help! I’m 29 and i was recently diagnosed with fibroids in March of 2020. Alittle back story: Around March of 2019 I hired a personal trainer to help me work on getting abs. Fast forward to Jan.2020, i noticed that stomach was not getting flatter but bigger, it literally started to look like I was pregnant! I did notice that by this time my period did start to last longer than usual. My period is usually 5 days long and I've always been a heavy bleeder but lately I would spot for 4 days after my period was supposed to be over. So the next day after working out w. my trainer in Feb. 2020 , I woke up to a bulge at the bottom of my stomach. I figured maybe I had pulled something while working out and just shrugged it off. Until it didn’t go way andI went to my GP, he is actually the one who discovered the fibroid and sent me to do a US in March. I was reffered to a gyn and he said its huge. 10cm to be exact. anyways , I’m told that I will need a myomectomy and that I may not be able to have kids. But I really do plan on getting married one day(Whenever God permits to send me my husband) and having a family. Its one of the main things want in life ! But I am not ready for kids right now. I’m not married yet, I don’t even have a boyfriend yet. And I'm feeling like the only option is to get some guy and get pregnant now after the surgery or there will be no chance for me to have kids in the future! And now I have been constantly crying myself to sleep everyday feeling depressed and like I somehow failed. I'm scared and feeling helpless and dont know who to talk to about this. Please help!

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  • Posted

    I also have a scheduled surgery date of July 9th . And it may be pushed up to a date sooner, which is fine by me because I want this thing out of me now ! I think my biggest issue is the not being able to ever have kids part. I thought I was doing everything right. I was waiting to find the right person to marry and have a family with. I also will be going back to school in Sept. for my DNP to become a Pediatric NP(I am a NICU RN now) and honestly, Ive been debating if I should even going back to school, maybe I should be focusing my time on finding a husband. I dont know. . .

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  • Edited

    Hi alexisbrick,

    If you go carefully through the different postings on this site and others (there are a few Facebook groups too), you'll find postings by women who had myomectomies and then successfully got pregnant afterwards. The doctor has to tell you the risks, though. That's his/her job. When I first was diagnosed with fibroids, I was told that having fibroids would make pregnancy risky. Now that I have them out, I feel soooo much better.

    Good luck, and take care.

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    • Posted

      I have been looking through Google for forums about fibroids for weeks and this is one of two that I finally found. Though, I haven't thought to look on FB. Thanks for that. When did you get yours taken out? and how long did it take for you to feel better?

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  • Edited

    Hi Alexisbrick . Please do not be depressed or scared. Like @Poplar said the doctors have to tell you the risks involved with surgery. There are so many women who have had myomectomy done and was able to have kids. I had fibriods as well in different sizes. I had them removed months ago and i can tell you that i feel alot better now.

    I understand how you must be feeling please try not to worry too much. Once the worrying is gone you will be able to make the best decision concerning school.

    I wish you all the best.

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    • Posted

      I mean I know they have to tell me the risks involved but I feel like that is the ONLY risk they seem to mention. Btw, I got a second opinion just the other day and she made sure to tell me the same thing the first doctor did just in more kinder words. "I usually tell all my patients that after the surgery, in 3-6 months I want them to start trying to conceive. Because now that you have a history of fibroids it may be harder for you to have kids"

      Yea, I am actually looking forward to the surgery because this thing is interfering with my life and it needs to go! I really do wish that I would have caught it sooner, I can't help but to think that it would have made a difference.

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  • Edited

    Hi Alexisbrick, I had my open myomectomy Jan 2020 to remove 5 fibriods. I too went through the same stresses as you especially being a female in her late 30s, single and wanting kids in the future.

    The doctors have to explain all the risks to you and as the surgery is quite common, you'll find most females get through the surgery with no/minimal complications. Most of the females in my family have had the surgery and all went on to have kids so I'm hoping this will be me too.

    I would say focus on your operation and your recovery as nothing could have prepared me for that.

    Stay positive and keep opening up on forums. There are some great posts on here from some very brave women so I would advise having a read or even watching YouTube videos (I watched a lot pre and post surgery to get some tips).

    All the best!!

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    • Posted

      Thank you for responding. It's comforting to know there is someone out there going through the same thing. How long did your family members to have kids after the surgery? Did any of them having any pregnancy complications?

      I've been so eager to get rid of this thing that I must admit I have been kind of thinking of the surgery as a no big deal thing. But after reading some of you guys comments, it seems like the after math is no joke. I am definitely going to look at Youtube(didn't think of doing that either) and going through some more posts on here. Thanks for that!

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  • Edited

    I know that youre scared. For the life of me I don't understand why someone would tell you that you might not be able to have kids after a myomectomy. I had a myomectomy in 2016 at age 41. My doctor never said anything like this to me! The only thing we talked about was fertility treatments due to my age. Unfortunately my relationship during this time didn't work out and I never had kids. At this point I'm looking into adoption.

    One of my besties has had three myomectomies and she now has a 2 year old son. She is 40. Tamaron Hall the talkshow host had her first child at 48! Senator Tammy Duckworth of Illinois had children at 46 and 48! Please do not fret! You're only 29! I would seek out another doctor.

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    • Posted

      I saw a second gyn and she was nicer and said it may be harder for me to have kids. Which I guess is a step up from the first doctor. She also went to say that if I was to get pregnant I would have to have a c-sec. I asked her if there was any way that I could at least try a vaginal birth when I have birth and her answer was no. I mean I'm not being picky, if a c-sec gives me a healthy baby, then I'm okay with it. It's just that my preference is vaginal. Nonetheless, I just want a doctor could say something along the lines of "yes it may be harder for you to get pregnant but every woman is different and I've had many woman have successful pregnancies after surgery". My mom says she thinks it is because they don't want to get my hopes up and it doesn't turn out that way, which I do understand. However, I don't think they need to be so bleak and not follow up with any kind of optimism. I will say that the first doctor stressed that fibroids are very common and was very focused with having it removed. He had the disposition of 'its a tumor but its not cancerous, you have it removed, you heal, and then all it right with the world'. He also did bring up IVF but he said if needed we'll cross that bridge when we get there. I don't know, I guess I'm just too worried.

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  • Edited

    Hi Alexisbrick,

    please dont stress too much. Fibroids are actually very common in women of childbearing age. A lot of women have them and dont know they have them until they have an ultrasound by chance or when they are pregnant. Thats how i found out about mine. A lot of people have kids with the fibroids in there but this can cause complications. not all the the time. The other thing to remember is there are so many other things other than fibroids that affect fertility other than fibroids.. for example pcos, endometriosis, diabetes, genetics, weight etc. You just never know until you actually start trying to have kids which one it is. So dont feel like you did something wrong...its just chance and a part of life. What you gotta do is prepare yourself to get the best chance possible to have children. You can do this by speaking to gynocologists and fertility specialist and they point you in the right direction. i really understand that pressure at 29 to get married and have kids but try not to stress too much. Best thing u can do is arm yourself with information and then plan accordingly. its going to be ok. x

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    • Posted

      Thank you so much for your kind words. You are absolutely right. My best friend has been saying through all of this "You never know what's going to happen tomorrow or 3 years from now so don't worry about the unknown." I guess I just heard them say that it may be hard for me to have kids and became fixated on those words. After calming down a little bit, I can see you guys are both absolutely right. Thank you so much for understanding!

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  • Posted

    Hi Alexisbrick,

    please dont stress too much. Fibroids are actually very common in women of childbearing age. A lot of women have them and dont know they have them until they have an ultrasound by chance or when they are pregnant. Thats how i found out about mine. A lot of people have kids with the fibroids in there but this can cause complications. not all the the time. The other thing to remember is there are so many other things other than fibroids that affect fertility other than fibroids.. for example pcos, endometriosis, diabetes, genetics, weight etc. You just never know until you actually start trying to have kids which one it is. So dont feel like you did something wrong...its just chance and a part of life. What you gotta do is prepare yourself to get the best chance possible to have children. You can do this by speaking to gynocologists and fertility specialist and they point you in the right direction. i really understand that pressure at 29 to get married and have kids but try not to stress too much. Best thing u can do is arm yourself with information and then plan accordingly. its going to be ok. x

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  • Posted

    Hi Alexisbrick,

    please dont stress too much. Fibroids are actually very common in women of childbearing age. A lot of women have them and dont know they have them until they have an ultrasound by chance or when they are pregnant. Thats how i found out about mine. A lot of people have kids with the fibroids in there but this can cause complications. not all the the time. The other thing to remember is there are so many other things other than fibroids that affect fertility other than fibroids.. for example pcos, endometriosis, diabetes, genetics, weight etc. You just never know until you actually start trying to have kids which one it is. So dont feel like you did something wrong...its just chance and a part of life. What you gotta do is prepare yourself to get the best chance possible to have children. You can do this by speaking to gynocologists and fertility specialist and they point you in the right direction. i really understand that pressure at 29 to get married and have kids but try not to stress too much. Best thing u can do is arm yourself with information and then plan accordingly. its going to be ok. x

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  • Edited

    I had a myomectomy at 26 years old to remove 5 fibroids. My consultant didn't tell me i couldn't ever have children. My aunt has had this surgery twice and after both surgeries shes fallen pregnant and had 2 sons.

    i hope this helps.

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    • Posted

      This definitely makes me feel better about my possibilities. If you don't mind me asking, at what age did she have the surgery and when did she have her sons?

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