Please Help! Turn for the worse today

Hi Allison, I dont know where the fear has come from I think because it looks so scary and not knowing when it could happen. I am scared because the feelings I get like the intense anxiety fear, cold and hot adrenaline rushes, deja vu etc making me think that these are auras before a seizure. My neuro says that it is unlikely I have temporal lobe epilepsy but the forums and websites online suggest otherwise. Plus I am scared that he has sent me for an EEG maybe he thinks I have it? Even though he did say were not rushing to do and just for reassurance.

My worry are these intense waves of fear keep rushing over me more so today. 

The drug citalopram which I took this morning says that you need to let doctor know if you have epilepsy or seizures before taking but I havent been diagnosed with anything yet other than anxiety. 

Just called my GP and they did say you can feel more anxious on any antidepressant at the beginning but surely this wouldnt work that quick or is it I have seziures and this is making it worse?

I'm sure your having these tests to put your mind at ease, but can completely understand your worry.

Googling everything I find makes it worse as there is always a illness you will associate the symptoms with.

Starting a new drug is always a bit of anxiety in itself and yes they can make symptoms worse for the first few weeks.

I hope things settle down for you.

Hi Karen,

Do you think from reading my posts that this is anxiety or seizures? 

I think it's always a good idea to rule out any other illnesses,  but it appears, from reading through your posts this has pretty much been done.

I think it is all anxiety related, so many of us are suffering from the same symptoms.

Try sticking with the Citalopram for a while if you can, it won't work straight away as you know, and can make the symptoms worse to start off with as I said.

Try not to google, I know we are all guilty of it!!

Good luck

I cant take this today I keep having these waves of panic and seizure like feelings almost continuously all day. I am going to come off the citalopram after one day as I do not like this and struggling to do my job? But what if it is not the tablets and just the seizures are properly starting?

Hi

I get fully what you mean my main health fears have been many different things , but my biggest fear was gping psychotic that scares the living hell out off me .

I was at one point convinced I was psychotic even though I had no symptoms other then the ones I was creating myself .

And when i was in that obession it honestly didnt matter what anyone said to me , helped for a while the doctors reassurance but it never lasted very long

So i get how hard this is for you , i cant anwser weather your 100% not having seizures but its looking very much unlikely that these feelings are a seizure.

Get the eeg done because honestly I would if i was in this obession right now .

So sorry i cant really help its so horrible this anxiety stuff .

You really have to get i to therapy and deal with the health anxiety part , it will help you learn tools to deal with theses anxiety when they pop up in life .

Thanks Allison and I am sorry you are and have gone through the anxiety stuff too. It's even got to the point now that I am scared to leave my house because when these waves of symptoms come on I find it EMBARRASING being around anyone inc my family as I cannot concentrate its like a mini intense panic attack that last seconds but my only symptoms are intense feelings of fear/unreality, vision changes, massive hot and cold sweats  and the tightness around my head and my eyes do tend to dilate a bit and water. It can happen in the most comfortable places and when it comes over me I can't carry on a conversation and feel like I need to escape. 

What is this? Can anxiety attack S last only seconds? 

Yes  Jonathon.  Anxiety attacks can last from seconds to minutes!

Mine come in waves too, and sometimes only last a few seconds,

If it's really bad it can last much longer !

I really think you need to speak to your GP asap!

I guess you haven't taken another Citalopram? In which case you really do need to talk to a medical professional asap and also ask to be referred for therapy.  You can not go on like this any longer!!

Please make that phone call today.

Anxiety can be debilitating and stop us from doing even everyday things!

Wow you totally described the attacks i had in December 2015 , seriously back in Nov 2015 when i developed the fear of going psychotic i became so anxious about it that all I did was goggle about psychotic illnesses , non stop 24/7 it was utterly horrible .

After about one month of that intense obsessing i started to get these attacks just like you describe.

I would feel so strange and just like you it would last a few minutes then go then come on again , like waves off attacks .

I honestly didnt know what it was , I didn't think it was panic attacks because I'd had panic attacks for over 18 years and never ever had i had such strange and scary panic attacks .

I saw my normal doctor and he said the attacks are panic attacks , but i didn't believe him .

I got hormonal blood tests and full blood count tests , everything came back normal .

I ended seeing a neurosurgeon that in the past had diagnosed me with a cavamona on my brain , which is abnormal blood vessels and i had a micro bleed a few years before the attacks started .

Anyway i saw the neurosurgeon and described the attacks i was getting and he sent me to a neurologist.

The neurologist told me the symptoms are nothing to do with my brain but is from anxiety ....

So after i saw him i accepted it , i finally gave in and really accepted it as anxiety attacks.

Still to this day I can really explain how scary those attacks were it was the worst feelings ever .

And to be honest I hope I never feel them again but at least now I know its panic attacks .

If you go on my profile and search my very first posts you will see i explain those attacks .

The part in your last reply were you write ' i feel like I need to escape ' that was the worst feeling about those attacks i had , tgat i need to escape feeling is intense and when i had that panic flee feeling i use to get in my car and just drive to get away from that fear but it came eith me ..

The way you described your last reply hit me hard because ive never seen anyone explain simalar feelings from a panic attack.

So sorry your gping though that its absoulty scary and so alone 😓

One thing that stopped those attacks for me was valium and tamazapan .

I hate meds and never ever tale meds but during that scary as being in hell time i had to take them or go to hospital involuntary.

The meds were a blessing for me then

I only took them for a few weeks then stopped once i calmed down

After I did calm down i was hit with chroinc derealization and depersonalization from all that panic / ocd.

Agggg horrible horrible stuff

Sorry this is soooo long i had to tell my story for it to make sense .

???

Hi Allison,

Thank you very much for sharing this story and I really do hope that you are getting through this. It really is the worst time of my life right now. How I am still at work is beyond me.

I am sorry for all you had gone through, It is good that the neurologist ruled everything out for you a bit like me. But my panic/fear is I read epilepsy forum which suggest that a simple partial seizure can be going on years before it progresses so that is why I am scared because the symptoms that we both have/had match both conditions of anxiety and epilepsy and combined with my fear of seizures I dont know what to believe. 

If they ever diagnosed me with epilepsy I would never cope ever again and for me my life would be over. 

These symptoms though just don't seem to be easing at all in fact their going worse. 

Hi

Thanks for your reply im in a much better place then back then .

I know what you mean ehen you say you wouldn't be able to cope if you got diagnosed with epilepsy.

I'm the same with any type of psychotic illness i couldn't cope i couldn't handle that at all .

I'm a lot better with that obsessive thinking abput it only because im 33 now so i knoe its rare at my age to develop a psychotic illness and i have no family history off these problems .

I think once you have the eeg you will feel a lot better

Sometimes it takes a full investigation to get to that place were you can relax and move on .

When's the eeg hopefully soon ?

I forgot to say

That working is most likely helping you because at least you are busy during the day

Good on you its tough

Great to hear your in a better place. I am 36 and I would have thought surely if i had epilepsy/seizures it would have developed by now?

My EEG is in 6 weeks as I cant afford to get this done privately and the neurologist suggested to wait and not pay for it.

I would like to think if my neurologist was concerned he would have sent me for an eeg immediately what do you reckon?

 

Really can't accept that this is anxiety these symptoms are much worse than last time and I am convinced it's temporal lobe epilepsy? My symptoms I have described are they like yours? Do you get the deja vu? Do you get the strange shivery cold and hot sweats come over you and the panic and vision going hazy feeling? This only lasts seconds though 

Everything you describe sounds exactly like chronic anxiety.

I've been suffering for years and have flare ups when it gets much worse.

I don't think you are going to rest until you've had this test, but it is 6 weeks away, if they thought it was anything worrying they would of got you on much sooner.

Are you on any antidepressants at all?

Hi Karen I have just started taking citalopram 20mg and my anxiety is worse than ever and thus is only my second day of taking the tablet. 

I am compulsive about seizures and epilepsy only because I am getting the same symptoms. These are simple partial seizures with auras  from what I have read which can turn into a complex partial or secondary generalised seizure the one where you lose consciousness. Or if anxiety can create my symptoms then I will be astounded 

Hi

Sorry I've not been o n here to see your questions .

I had one of those attacks tonight

Strangely out off no were , it lasted for about 10 minutes and it was scary .

I felt my vision go hazy first , then i felt strange in my stomach , then my surroundings felt very odd , i felt intensely fearful and just a need to escape .

It left but im so drained from it and very shocked .

To anwser your questions , yes i do think that the neurologist would of sent up an emergency eeg if he thought there was even a slight chance you may be having seizures .

You asked if i get the symptoms you listed , when i had those attacks yes i did have those feelings i got deja vu even get deja vu without the attacks i had the panic but way way way more intense then normal panic and i also had this strange feelings in my lower legs and my lower arms which made me think it was a stroke , it also felt like i couldn't think during the attacks kinda like my mind was blocked yet it felt like my mind was going super intense fast .

It was insane scary and tonight I had it again so i feel ya its horrid .

I forgot to say i use to get a fast feeling happening wuth those attacks like everything felt faster hard to explain sorry .

Oh and i use to get this feeling in my stomach it felt like my tummy would rise into my heart luke a wave

Hi Allison I am so sorry that your going through this. It is so awful isnt it? How can we overcome this though so things get better for us? 

The feelings are horrible its like constant all day and then the intense waves will come on at random times throughout the day but last seconds. Can anxiety really cause this though? 

Hi Jonathon

It's crazy hey , i do really 1 million percent believe that anxiety can cause our symptoms.

When i had that attack a few hours ago , i started to think it wasnt anxiety , i thought it was something worse like a brain bleed or something other then a panic attack .

I had to really control myself while it was happening , by talking out loud to myself , telling mysrlf that its only a panic attack

While it was happening it was coming in waves , like it would calm down then peak again then calm dowm then peak again , im guessing that is the adrenalin my body at the time .

Honesty before all this happened to me in 2015 , i thought i had experienced every single panic attack symptom over the 17 yrs i have had them .

But After all the feelings /symptoms ive had since 2015 i really belive anxiety can produce so many random feelings , like right now as im typing this my chest feels like it's cold for no reason ....

Sorry i hope my writing makes sense im so drained from before😴😓😴

I forgot to ask you weather you also kinda shake during the attacks?

I do and it feels odd not top off every thing else

Oh the joys of anxiety Allison it literally is the worst thing we could ever go through. I genuinely dont know how we can get over this. The adrenaline rushes are weird arent they? I dont particularly shake but I am shaken from all these episodes but I do get random twitches. The bizarre thing is I thought panic attacks last minutes not seconds? 

I cant take much more of this. I have been taking citalopram as well for three days and it actually is making these feelings more frequent. 

I dont know I have accepted this is anxiety which helps alot

How to stop it is another question , ive read to accept that it may never go away is the anwser ?

When you get the attacks does it last the few seconds and not come back within a few minutes ?

With the meds it does make the anxiety worse in some people before it gets better .

I was in luvox once and it felt bad at first then it got alot better.

Hang in there

It can come in waves last seconds then I could go a little while without another surge or I could have another wave minutes later their is no pattern to be honest. All I know is their does not seem to be any break from this feeling.