Problem making a decision

Posted , 5 users are following.

Hello everyone!

Ever since I can remember I always had trouble making decisions which ends up with me just not doing anything at all.

know I have to make a very important one, and I just don't know what to do.

I think I'm going crazy thinking all the time so much.

Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this problem?

Thank you,


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25 Replies

  • Posted

    Could you be a little more specific  -  after all, you decided to come on to this forum, so you didn't do nothing on that one. Not making fun of you, truly.

    What's the important one? Can you share that? Or if not, give some examples?

    I am having a little trouble knowing what to say. I hope someone else comes along who will be more helpful.     xxx

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  • Posted

    Someone once said not making a decision is in itself a decision. A decision should be made by you before random circumstances force a conclusion. Don't let your time run out. Trust yourself.

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  • Posted

    I have a child like this. Shes is grown this is what i told her to help her. Get a piece of paper and on top write out your dilema or the situation. Then make columns. Pros and cons of the two ir three (max is 3) options or choices. THen all done you go back and number from 1-5 the intensity of the pros and cons. Then do the math. This should absolutely help. The worst scenario is you break even then you need to re evaluate the pros and cons. It should help you.  The other alternative is go with your initial instinct. Which is more attractive for you. Which scenario brings you closer to your goal or to happiness.  
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  • Posted

    I'm sorry for not giving more information in the beginning.

    I have to decide between moving to a new city in order to get closer to my job (have to take a bus 1.5 hours in each direction), or quitting my job and going back to university and complete a master's degree..

    Sometimes I think I know what I want and then my mood changes and suddenly I have not idea what to do...

    I'm not taking any medicine for anxiety but I have been diagnosed with OCD by a psychiatrist. He said that I'm ambivalent because of very low self esteem.


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    • Posted

      Well -  a wise Professor from the US who I once knew (yes, it sounds unlikely but we met in rural Devon, England while I was down there chasing after a young man who had the temerity to be cheating on me)

      BTW, young girls - do not do this - it just makes things worse. Such as "why are you DOING this - go back to London etc etc"

      Sorry. Back to the wise Professor, who was by now married to my boyfriend's mum after a very long first marriage.......

      I'LL GET THERE !!

      He told me that he and his first wife and children had made a decision that they would never live more than fifteen minutes' walk from wherever he was working. They moved around, owing to his job, aand had a few children, as people generally do.

      But I always remembered that. And personally, I would not like to have to travel three hours every day to and from work.

      But do you want the Masters more than the job? My son got a B.A. (Hons) degree here in London (history) and has yearned ever afterwards to do a Masters. In fact, he REALLY wants to be a Professor at Oxford of Cambridge, but lack of funds within our family cannot begin to pay for another degree course.

      So now he teaches guitar and works in a pub.

      I don't know if this rambling response will be of any help whatsoever.

      Low self-esteem? That sucks - so that's why you feel you cannot make a decision. Tuh! and Bah! to that.

      I know perfectly well what you WANT to do. You're young. Try not to prevaricate. And choose wisely, putting your goals first and telling yourself that low self-esteem can be cured, and soon you'll be in charge of yourself.

      That may not be exactly true, if I'm honest, but when you make a wise decision, you'll feel much better about yourself.

      I'm curious, as are most women, so stick with us and tell us what you decided.              xx Tess

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    • Posted

      If you have anxiety that badly i would not suggest living in a new city at this time. Go back and complete your masters degree for now. It doesnt seem anyone feels better in the height of their anxiety moving from their home. 
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  • Posted

    Forget which one makes sense. Which one feels right. Which one makes you smile?

    That's usually what works for me. Does making that run to work day after day after day for weeks, months, even years make you smile?

    Does getting your degree which will produce more opportunities make you smile?

    Make sure you are making the decision for yourself, not what you think you SHOULD do, or what others want you to do. I think you already know in your heart what you don't let fear stop you. Hugs

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