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Self image post op

Posted , 22 users are following.

DawnDedee
DawnDedee

This is a sensitive topic for me, but I wonder how others are dealing with the body changes post op?  Right now my body is in the worst shape, and in fact, it is in the shape that I fought succesfully my whole adult life to avoid.  I have lost my figure.  I do not think, at my age, that I will ever get it back.  I had to lay around for a year and a half in agony with a failed THR, and there was nothing I could do.

I cannot relax into this, yet I lack the energy and drive to work out and I wonder if at my age, nearly 58, I can even turn this around.

I do not like what I see in the mirror.

Dawn, USA

 

7 likes, 133 replies

133 Replies

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  • renee01952
    renee01952 DawnDedee

    Posted

    Dear Dawn, 

    this post comes at the right time - I am soooooo unhappy with the way I look ...

    Rose, that is what I am telling myself - really - but today !!!!   my stomach has a life of its own - so big , it is sticking out - Tops I could wear comfortably with X-mas are tight !!!!   

    I am with Sandra - I am 67 years (goodness) and don't expect to look  when I was 21 or 40 (I was not happy with what I saw then either ... go figure) or even 50 !!! 

    now, and I am not sure if this for real or not, but I am exercizing, walking, do the stationary bike and do volunteer work (not full time) - I can see that the muscles in my calves are coming back, which makes my thighs swell up - A no-win situation because I can feel the hardware - 

    I am getting bigger cry - even my sweats feel tight ...

    Can't blame menopause anymore ....  

    okay, time to go within - to accept what is unconditionally and be grateful -

    I can walk, I am independent , I am free !!!!

    angel blessings

    and big really big embrace 

    renee

     

    • rose0000
      rose0000 renee01952

      Posted

      But there comes a point when we need to stop caring no? To be free and let ourselves be who we are....surely this is liberation in saying to hell with it all, I will not care, I am just going to enjoy my life regardless.

      My husband looks in the mirror sucks his tummy in and says how good he looks with age, and I do the opposite. This is not healthy AT ALL! and he has the right idea....we are all fine as we are, tummies and all.

      We dress well to enhance what we have, we get fit so we can be well, calf muscles and all, and stand tall or taller and we puff out our chest, look the world in the eye and we will not be afraid to show the world who we are, We recognise that this desire to be younger, slimmer, more beautiful is just an eternal road to self hatred and destruction and can only lead us to place of unhappiness, we all know this, and yet we still trudge along it, hoping something will change, that we will change, when we are lovely just as we are. 

      This subject has really fired me - can you tell??

      Inspiring to get fit, but to be 20 years younger? That stationary bike is just not going to be able to do it babe!!!!! smile

      Not for me, and not for you.

      At some point our western world has to celebrate AGE and WISDOM and beauty within...when are we going to learn to let go and live?

      As much as I look at the mirror, when I can bear to, I can hear my ancestors whispering to me that beauty shines from within, radiates from your smile, lights up your eyes sparkling, and tummy or not, nothing can compare to that beauty....and you are truly beautiful Renee, and I can tell you that without even looking at you.

    • Rocketman_SG6UK
      Rocketman_SG6UK renee01952

      Posted

      Renee,

      What is important is the person inside the body, and you are a most amazing woman.   So glad to have known you (even if only on this forum) for your compassion and helpful nature.   

      Graham - 🚀💃

    • rose0000
      rose0000 Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      I second that rocket completely about Renee, she is an angel in my book. 
    • renee01952
      renee01952 rose0000

      Posted

      awwww ... we are mirrors to each other - each and everyone of us 
    • Rocketman_SG6UK
      Rocketman_SG6UK Gaby21

      Posted

      You are all such wonderful, warm, giving people - it restores my faith in humanity.
    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee renee01952

      Posted

      Thank you Renee, you along with everyone else, are so amazing!  Accepting myself unconditionally is difficult but I see the worth in it.  I need to count my blessings and feel more grateful that I am pain free and can walk again.  I went to the movie theatre with friends recently and I had to get up to go to the bathroom, so I had to step sideways to get past all of my friends to get to the aisle.  I then realized that I truly could walk without pain!  I could even walk sideways!  

      I too can feel the hardware in my left hip, the revision, because a much larger device had to be used.

      I lost 12 pounds soon after the revision because I was up and moving about again.  Now I am stuck at the same weight but at least am not gaining more.  It is time for me to step up the exercise.  

      At the sixth month post op, I took a lowly job for two hours a day, just to get moving again and out among the living.  But the job ended up being more physically demanding than I had anticipated.  Light janitorial duties, alot of bending, lots of walking, and the first two months I sweated like I was inside a sauna, and thought I was going to die, but I pushed myself on by telling myself that all this sweating is getting rid of the toxins and all this movement is going to help rebuild muscles.

      Now, six months later, I can handle to duties much better and will hardly any sweating and this past weekend after meeting with friends who had not seen me in months, (and this was after my post), everyone asked if I had lost weight.  So that felt good and all of these wonderful posts have helped build upon that.

      Perhaps my spark to begin exercise with a purpose is just around the corner!

    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee rose0000

      Posted

      It is great that you are on fire Rose!  You are helping me attain my inner spark!  I want to be on fire again!  Passionate!  Creative!  Bold!  And I agree with you about Renee!
    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      Yes, I believe you have hit the core.  Humanity being kind to humanity.  It is refreshing.
  • debbi1949
    debbi1949 DawnDedee

    Posted

    You are not alone, and thank you for voicing exactly how I feel! I'm 66 and worked out, weights, aerobics, power walking) over 40 years to stay slim and fit. In fact I partially blame all that for my arithitic right hip and noncartilidge. My weight has balooned 30 pounds, I feel like a slug, and dread surgery. Constant pain has me chair ridden and looking for  surgery in the next month or 2. I live in California. I Hear you!
    • rose0000
      rose0000 debbi1949

      Posted

      It is your hips fault entirely Debbi, I am with you on that one, I blame mine too, and when you have your new hip next month it will be goodbye and good riddance and you will get fit again, you definitely will!! 
    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee debbi1949

      Posted

      Thank you Debbi for responding so kindly.  I did the same, worked out, stayed trim and fit.  I had a couple of minor weight gains, but nothing serious.  I am now 40 some pounds over weight and I too feel like a slug.  Constant pain changes every aspect of our lives.  And I wonder if pain medications cause some weight gain.
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