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Sex after surgery???

Posted , 10 users are following.

Resting123
Resting123

Morning ladies,

I'm nearly 7 weeks post p&a repair and perenium repair. Last night, hubby and me tried to sex for first time. NOT SUCCESSFUL!!

Sorry for tmi.. Used lots of lube, but didn't even get full penetration. For me, it felt so tight and I was really tense as I was so scared. And even after a little was in, I burst into tears and pushed him off! Now I'm worried it's too tight?!

Can anyone please advise/ put my mind at rest??

I feel like I'm losing my virginity all over again and can't relax about it now sad

Thank you in advance

0 likes, 39 replies

39 Replies

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  • Jan999
    Jan999 Resting123

    Posted

    Resting please don't worry because at 7 weeks post op I would have been surprised if you could have had intercourse. Being anxious doesn't help but you know that anyway. Leave it another week and try again.
    • Resting123
      Resting123 Jan999

      Posted

      Thank you matron. You always talk sense! Yes, it's me being impatient and wanting to get back to normal I guess. You're right about waiting another week. While I have you though, I do have another question if you don't mind.

      I have 2 boys of 10 and 2. I'm obviously having to do school runs etc now and having to lift 2 yr old into/ out of car, put up pushchair, lift pushchair in and out of boot. Also, lug him around to change nappies as he's a runner!

      He weighs much more than 10kg... More than 1.5 stone. Any advice on how to do this safely?im bending knees, taking it slowly but I'm concerned I may be jeopardising my repairs with all the lifting.

      Sorry for all questions but my post op isn't till end of Feb X

    • Jan999
      Jan999 Resting123

      Posted

      Ask away Resting. I'm a bit worried about you lifting your little boy but I understand that it's not always possible to avoid these things but it sounds as though you're lifting correctly. If you're doing the school run is there anyone around perhaps one of the other mothers who could lift him?
    • debra25218
      debra25218 Resting123

      Posted

      Hi Matron if I had my opp 3 weeks today..when in your opinion should I go back to work..,the hospital gave me 2 weeks sick note..I'm now on the 2nd week sick note from my Gp which runs out next week which means I should be returning back to work next Monday..🙈🙁
    • Jan999
      Jan999 debra25218

      Posted

      You will need another sick note from your GP debra. I'm not sure what you do but you should be off work at least 10 weeks.
    • debra25218
      debra25218

      Posted

      Hi so sorry for the long essay 🙈
    • debra25218
      debra25218

      Posted

      Sorry for the long essay ...
  • chris00938
    chris00938 Resting123

    Posted

    I remember thinking the same thing too - I think this is natural.  I'd suggest trying a finger first and then going VERY gradually from there.
    • chris00938
      chris00938 Resting123

      Posted

      You've given me tears of laughter now Resting LOL!  I'm not going to say a word in case I'm inferring anything about your partner's 'equipment' when compared to finger sizes LOL!
    • chris00938
      chris00938

      Posted

      Resting, my suggestion would be to use the water based Yes, and then the oil based Yes on top of that.  The combination of those two will give you 'super lubrication' when you do try again.  This is what they suggest on their site:-)
    • Resting123
      Resting123 chris00938

      Posted

      Haha... Now I'm laughing again!! Oh dear!!!...Nope, he's more than enough in that area!

      I can't even think to type now as I'm laughing too much!

    • chris00938
      chris00938 Resting123

      Posted

      I'm holding you responsible for the fact I'm choking on my lunch now LOL!
  • deborah57162
    deborah57162 Resting123

    Posted

    Hi I am 12 wks post op & had same op I am still in pain with sex it's excruciating so I was told 2 try coconut oil which I brought from Holland & Barrett still painful but not as bad I think we have got 2 soften the skin I am horrified because like u I thought my god have I got 2 go bk in hospital but I'm hoping it will stretch in time I'm 55 yrs of age good luck hope this helps x
    • Resting123
      Resting123 deborah57162

      Posted

      Hi Deborah,

      Thanks for the info, ill definitely try that. Soften the skin?? Jeez, why does nobody tell us this BEFORE the op lol. I'm so sick of it all now!

      Sorry for asking but what do you do? Just rub it in a couple of times a day?

    • deborah57162
      deborah57162 Resting123

      Posted

      I rub it on before sex & my husband rubs it on him self & start it gradually & in time it gets a little easier I'm still not completely pain free but hopefully I'm getting there 😬👍good luck x
    • Resting123
      Resting123 deborah57162

      Posted

      Great, I'll get some for next time! Hardly romantic but hey, if it works!! I think my husband will just roll his eyes and not say a word!! But thank you so much for the info, I'd try anything to make it better smile
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