Should patients waiting for surgery be stopped from having someone with them

Hello,

Yes I have had this happen to me and I think it's totally outrageous. The whole system is based around what's best for the hospital and not what is best for the patient. I can see no reason why a patient is not allowed to have a loved one with them before such a big event as surgery. It's the same with how they get everyone in a 7am even though you may have to wait five hours for your turn. No thought is paid to the stress that people go through when having to come in for an operation or the stress caused to the loved ones of said person. The staff are so used to it that are oblivious to the real distress it causes and therefore completely dismissive of people's real needs.

I had to have orbital decompression surgery last year. It's quite a big operation, had to have my eye sockets drilled out. Also it can cause blindness so I was very nervous. I also have a medical phobia so have a really difficult time even getting myself to the hospital. I was left totally distressed by the fact that my husband wasn't allowed to wait with me. I even explained my situation to a sour faced nurse but was basically told flatly 'No'. We were told we could wait out in the corridor if we wished to be together!

I regret not complaining about it now so maybe that's what you should do. I hope that your husband's surgery was successful and that he has made a full recovery.

I was in the Royal Sussex Hospital last year for heart surgery. Personally I did not want anyone sitting at my side worrying about me pre op and after surgery did not feel up to visitors for too long. Some had several family members there until lights out and back again the next morning until operation time. They were a noisy distraction to those who were unwell and trying to get some rest and in the way off staff.

How things have changed since I was a kid in the 30's and 40's.Then at Edinburgh's Sick Children's Hospital visitors were not allowed unless you were dying as it upset the children when the parents went. Later in Princess Margaret Rose Hospital the only visiting was on Saturday afternoons. My father said that worked on Saturday afternoons and had to get dispensation to visit on a Sunday.... well he did not want to miss the football.

In those days in Edinburgh each patient had a number. Numbers were in the evening papers (people did not have phones) under headings like Seriously Ill, family please visit. Ill no cause for concern. Ill making satisfactory progress etc.

Times were hard in them days:-)

I'd rather you were transiently upset than you smothered your (and other peoples) husbands / wifes / partners in MRSA or other random bugs Is this attitude harsh? Er, maybe

You get better support from patients in the ward who have been through the experience or like you waiting to have it than from weepy nervous family. Whatever has happened to the British stiff upper lip. Be like the Royals and just let the patient get on with it on their own.

I had no qualms about my 10% possibility of not surviving heart surgery. The option was death within the year. To me it is like getting on a plane, just relax as it is all out of your control and the professionals are doing their job.

Thank you for your opinions.

I just feel that it should be the patients choice if they want support from a loved one. I have made an compliant about it and a full investigation is taking place. There are reviews that show a reduction in anxiety when patients have someone wait with them before booked surgery. I had emergency surgery last year and my husband was with me right to the theatre doors.

Blue, hubby's surgery was very successful thank you he had spinal decompression.

I trust you all had successful surgery.

Blue, it's never too late to make an complaint, I was told if more people did they would do something about it. They welcome patients opinions so they can get it right.

I had a couple of day-surgery operations on my broken arm a year or so ago and was more than happy that my partner wasn't allowed to accompany me past the check-in area – he'd just be a distraction – but I do understand that other people might want company. However, at least two of the six patients for that day had their daughters/husbands with them because they couldn't speak English and needed a translator, so there are exceptions!

I had a cardiac surgery follow up appointment at Hove Polyclinic. One man had his mother, wife and two daughters with him. When his turn came his wife said that they all wanted to come in with him. The nurse was rather taken aback and said that she did not think that there would be enough room in the doctors office for them all. However they all trooped off down the corridor with him and did get in.

Sue that's just it, if its ok for one patient it should be for all, equal rights etc..

Derek I would only like to see that one person be allowed for support, to keep disruption to a minimal as I appreciate the nurses and doctors have a busy day ahead of them.

The visitors then phone all the rest of the family,chatter away and hand the phone to the patient. One spent all her time puffing on an electronic cigarette. Much better to go to the theatre calm and relaxed and not hyped up by visitors and business calls.

One ninny wanted to know why her husband was not getting lunch:-)

Derek I can well believe that last comment, some people are funny.

I just they need to consider all the patients, some people are lucky enough to not worry, but their are many like me that do. I wouldn't of stayed for my surgery if my husband had not been with me, I was in a right emotional state. My asked my husband if he wanted me to stay with him, I wasn't trying to force myself on him. Lucky enough I didn't leave, we arrived for 7:30am and at 11:30 they told him it was cancelled we live 1hour 30mins away from the hospital.

Operations were being cancelled every day when I had my cardiac surgery. One two consecutive days one man was on the trolley for theatre when his was cancelled due to a shortage of theatre staff. He was then sent home. Another man was in for the third time and his operation was again cancelled.

I used to be fearful of a lot of medical procedures and told myself that others are facing up to much worse.

I think of what our daughter went through before she died of cancer when she was 22.

There is nothing to fear except fear itself.

Derek I was in a emotional state because of the type of surgery I was having, not because of the surgery!

Everyone is different that's what needs to be addressed at the hospitals. I'm sorry to hear about your daughter.

I would just like to get as many opinions as possible for my own research.

Hi Donna,

Every type of surgery is worrying but it is better to have it rather than suffer the symptoms and restrictions on ones life.

In the last year 've had my aortic valve replaced, laser prostate surgery and last week my first cataract surgery.

I'm hoping to avoid hip replacement:-)

Now when surgeons tell me what they are going to do I tell them That I have watched it on YouTube

More opinions would be great please add