Sick of these ups and downs

Posted , 12 users are following.

Sorry to message once again just having a really bad day. Anxious and can't calm down and can't get out of my head. There will be some evenings I feel so good and like myself just for the next day for it to be gone and like it will never come back. These ups and downs are so hard. Just when I think I am getting better it gets taken from me sad

This Thursday will be I think 5 weeks on 40mg. I just want it to level out and I want to feel like myself again especially with the holiday season coming up. I don't want to ruin it for my son and husband and family. I feel so lost today like I'll never get it back. Just want some positivity please. Will I have good calm days soon?

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  • Posted


    I know how you feel. I am the same 20 weeks on cit now nearly 4 weeks back on 20 after going up to 40.

    Today and yesterday I have been ok but tues weds and thurs I was so anxious I went to the hospital. How long till the calm passes ? I can t make plans as I am so u npredictable. I feel like 2 people.

    My psych may want me to switch meds but I ve got this far and want to give it at least 8 weeks on the same dose.

    It is so frustrating. X

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    • Posted

      I am happy at least you're feeling ok now. I am beyond feeling terrible and anxious and scared. I just want to cry. And thinking of Christmas makes me sad because I don't want to be this way for it. I just want to feel good again.

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    • Posted


      Its a constanst battle with our brains, we put more stress on ourselves when we have a family. But you need to be kinder to yourself. I am not sure where you live I am in australia and we have support services that you can call 24/7. Do you have that.


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    • Posted

      I'm not sure I will have to look into it. I'm from Montreal,quebec Canada.

      I do put so much pressure on myself especially to get better because I hate having my son and husband see me this way. Esp my son. He's 3.

      And i am afraid it will ruin my relationship with my husband being so dependant lately.

      I need to learn to be less hard on myself but sometimes I feel like I am not good enough or not meant to feel happy and calm. It's silly I know. And then the times I feel calm I start wondering when the anxiety comes back.

      What dose are you on and how long have you been on citalopram?

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    • Posted

      Isabel, I can hear your struggle in your voice. However your husband will understand and support you. I had PNS 14years ago and I felt the same, would my husband leave me and so on, but he was my rock. I went on to have 3 more boys and every now and then I do so much for others that I forget to look after myself..especially this time of the year and it doesnt help when there is so much negativity around especially in my workplace.

      I am currently on day 9 at 10mg I think the most I went to was 20 and that made me feel like a zoombie. My maitance level was 10 so I am going to stay with that. I am also doing hypnotherapy which is great, its mediatation and they can get to you subconscious. I know its hard to hear but 2weeks is the worst. Up and down just tell yourself its the meds.

      Are you sleeping? Renee

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    • Posted

      I slept well last night but the two nights before I didn't sleep at all because I was worried about my best friend that was brought to the emergency room. So my anxiety got all crazy from that of course.

      Yesterday evening ended up being much better than the first half of the day... But this morning anxious again! sad

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  • Posted


    You could try breathing exersises, also Relaxation Techniques, Mindfulness.

    I know I keep saying the same thing, I realise the ups and downs are part of your condition and if somthing may work always give it a try. You have nothing to loose and a great deal to gain.

    If not already ask for some CBT that may also help your condition and its control


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