Side effects

dont apologise for complaining the whole point of this site is to talk about your worries, anxieties and anything you may think is really lame, its usually the small things that make the most difference. besides, hearing your problems help me block out mine for a while.

Thank you so much Azzi for listening to me...and your right, sometimes the smallest of things can make you feel better :D Hope everything's well on your side

Ellie x

A couple of years ago I had a nervous breakdown. Severe Shakes, Panic Attacks and periods of \"out with the fairies\" I could not recall but my wife said consisted of odd behavior and weird conversations but nothing threatening.I would have momentary blackouts which meant I would fall over. Urgent diarrhea was also a problem . I scratched my arms and legs until they bled. On seeing a Psychiatrist he upped the dose by four times. I started having nightmares and vivid \" conversations \" with my first wife who had died twelve years previously. the shakes and the panic attacks got worse. I was unable to be trusted with any sort of work.

I stopped taking the pills but did start drinking heavy which my wife and I preferred to having a \" stranger\" in the house. I do not recommend this course of action to anybody. I got better slowly but still suffer when things get stressful

In my case it was a severe reaction.If you feel worse after taking this stuff see the doctor and get off it. Quite honestly it has been responsible for my aversion to any sort of pills since.

Ellie, only those of us who have suffered from depression know what is like.I to get fed up with people saying pull yourself together or go for a bracing walk. All I want to do is curl up in a little ball in the bathroom and hide from the world.

My beloved second partner died in hospital,after my caring for her fulltime for the last three years, a month ago. I am frightened I will disappear down that black hole again but this time without the understanding and support of that wonderful woman.I tried to do something stupid with a couple of bottle of pills but just caused work and worry to people who cared.I realise that is not what she would have wanted me to do

I am taking one day at a time and wish you better times. Hang on inthere Gal.

Thank you very much for your comforting words Richard...maybe your right, the tablets may be causing the panic attacks...the last few nights i have been talking and screaming heavily, which is a bit worrying because i dont recall any of it..my family members were just telling me this in the morning...i know that i get a lot of dreams which may explain the fact that i am constantly tired as my brain doesnt get enough rest...the little of things scared me nowadays, which is a bit annoying because i used to a 'strong' person. My family is not making it easy either..i have depression and anxiety because of them and i am unable to say that i am undergoing treatment without worrying of the outcome. It's hard enough taking flu for the first few weeks without having parents who are constantly telling me to do eat when all i want to do is sleep...and you are right, until you they through depression people dont know what it involves and how hard it can be!

I am sorry about what happened to your partner and i will you all the courage and strength to fight it all...i am sure you have a lot more to look forward to and there are lots of people around you who care. I know words bring little comfort but sometimes they make you feel better. Think of it this way, your partner is still part of you so look after yourself and make her memories live longer...

How are you dealing with your depression, because i know that there are other medicines the doctors can offer you if flu isnt working...i know you didnt have a good experience with flu but not all of them are going to react in the same way.

Mind you at the moment i am taking it every day at a time too but we are strong people and i know we can do it :D

take care

What I hate is people telling you your are strong, keep your chin up, your'll be able to get through this ..

I have taken my first flu today, I have always said I never would, but here I am.

Seems I am older than most of you at the ripe old age of 45, my partner had an affair, I found out five months ago, since then we have been trying to work through it, with him saying he loves me and wants to work this out, would do anything it took, then for no reason two days before Christmas said he was going to leave.

I have three children who are going to be so hurt by this, a house I cannot afford to run on my own, a full time job to hold down and a mum who is unwell and drives me to despair (parents don't get any easier as we get older). Obviously I have been warned that I would feel worse before I get better, but not to the degree I have read about on here. She also said 2-3 weeks, clearly it takes much longer.

How am I going to do this and remain strong for my children?

Hi Red64

Firstly, I am so sorry for what has happened to you - I don't think any words that anyone says will make you feel better - it's just going to be time.

I went through what your children are going through, twice (i.e. my parents had affairs, got divorced when I was around six, got back together, remarried, my father had an affair and they finally split up and divorced when I was around 24).

Looking at it from my mum's point of view, she is better off withouth my father. She would have been around 48 when this happened. She met someone else on the internet a few years later and they married. My step father has been more of a father to me, than my real father was.

How old are your children? Does your husband not have to help with the mortgage payments? If not, then what about putting the house on the market and down sizing? I know it's not ideal, but the worst thing you can do is to start getting into debt. It's better to be couped up in a smaller house with money to spare, rather than having people knocking at your door.....

Flu WILL help you to cope. But it does take time - it took me around 3 weeks (so not very long). My Counsellor upped by dose from 20mg to 40mg after 3 weeks.

Do you have other people around you that can support you emotionally and with the kids?

Take care and I'm thinking of you

Fauve xx

Hi red64, just a little something to make you feel a little better.You may be the ripe old age of 45 but that was the age I met my wonderful second wife and she was two older than me..I am my sell by date of 60 but who knows what the future holds. My wife was only 62 when she died, her mother passed on 2 years ago aged 88. just doesn't make sense some how. I have two stepsons going through divorces at the moment. The marriages have lasted less than 6 years. Mine lasted 17 and 15 respectively and wanted neither to end.

Thankfully I have never been through a divorce. A partners death is a sudden brutal and painful event but is a clean break with no acrimony only sorrow.

I hope that 2010 brings you rightful solution to you and your families problems.....best wishes ..richard.