So insecure!!!

Hi Laura,

What a great post! Yes, I think that insecurity and obsession are extremely common at this stage of life.

Even though I am very active and fit, and I can look around at other women, even a number of years younger than me, and know that I have a strong and slim body, my brain still seems to find any of my perceived physical "flaws".

I sometimes obsess about any lines on my face or the changing texture and thickness of my hair. No matter how hard I try to let go of these thoughts, they just persist. What I find works best is just letting the thoughts be there, and then my brain seems to eventually let go of them.

When I am in a better frame of mind, I then have perspective and no longer worry about these things.

It's so strange how hormones create this insecurity, but they clearly do.

Just know that you are not alone in your worries, and that they are incredibly normal.

May they pass quickly for all of us, so that we can celebrate the amazing and strong women that we are.

It is so important that we work of valuing who we are not what is reflected back in the mirror.

I will sometimes walk past a mirror and glance at myself and am shocked at what is looking back at me! Is that really what I look like now!? My hair has become frizzy, my skin is drooping, some age spots and I just am truly shocked! It's like it takes me a second to realize it's my reflection I'm seeing in the mirror! Like it's some stranger that I'm looking at and then it startles me that's it me! What the heck happened to me!? I usually shake my head in disbelief and move on but if I get really shocked at how old and haggered I look, I will actually say something out loud... " GEEZUSSSS! What the hell is this that I'm looking at!!?!!" 😜 I do get flustered at times that I'm getting old. It's sometimes weird because it's like it's a temporary condition and it will pass like the other peri symptoms and I'll pop out the other side of this hell and be oh, 30 years old again! but then I realize it's only going to get worse!  I always tried to go with the flow and appreciate the different stages of my life.. easy to do before we REALLY start to age and change! I hope once I get past the worst of my symptoms I will care more and feel good enough to focus on looking better. Many days I'm just happy I feel decent! I do have sympathy my family has to look at me looking very drained and "old" but oh well... such is life! 

I know I still look at pretty women and admire their beauty and I'm sure my husband does too. i wish I still looked like I did when I was 25! Hell, I wish I still looked like I did when I was 44! ( I'm 50 now). I know most guys don't worry about aging like women but my husband has aged as well. He's almost bald, has glasses, butt went flat and arms have gone soft!.. I still find him good looking and love him more now than I did all those years ago. And judging by my reflection in the mirror and the way he treats me- he feels the same about me! 😋 I know it's tough and the struggle is real! Try not to be so hard in yourself! I have noticed that as we are getting older we are given more slack. I don't think we are being judged as harshly for not being super slim, super tight or super agile anymore. I know when I see women over 40 and they look more like I do and some look even worse, I don't chastise them for not looking young anymore. I actually find it refreshing that I can go out with barely any makeup ( just a bit of spot foundation and mascara) and wear comfy clothes and enjoy the day instead of being overly concerned with how I look! It was fun being young and tight! i see myself in my 19 year old daughter who looks very much like me! She is full of life and is just a ball of beautiful energy! She also invests a lot of time in looking good, working out and being concerned with if this matches that and what looks good over what is practical and comfortable. I joke sometimes that I'd take being "young and dumb" over this wisdom crap we inherit with age but also exchange for the beauty and energy of our youth... but think how hard it was and how much energy we blew being young and perky! It's exhausting! No wonder we feel so sluggish now! 😜😂

Your husband sounds like a great guy! He's right, y'all will get through this stage together! Then when it's all a distant memory, look back and laugh at the craziness of it all! 

Yes.  I work with university students, so I’m always around young people.  I’m also the oldest staff member in my immediate group.  It’s a disheartening situation at times.

I try not to think so much about and to go on my life. The most important is our health, our psychology and our attitude in general. The others don’t see us the way we see ourselves. We tend to be cruel to ourselves and comparing with others make things worst. Our sexuality and attraction has not to do only with how we look but how we feel  and perceive ourselves.