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I didn't drink last night. It was hard at a couple of points when temptation nearly got the better of me but I didn't do it. The earlier part of the day i was optimistic - the drink monster was talking to me on & off saying my night would be boring without it. I tried to ignore it.
I practiced my dancing while my husband & Son watched the usual Saturday movie & had some popcorn. As I was finishing the drink monster started talking to me again. It was trigger time ! Every Saturday I would practice & it would be nearing bedtime for my son & while my husband but him to bed I would pour myself my first drink. There was no booze in the house so it wasn't an option. I decided to take the dog on the walk I had promised her & I put money in my pocket thinking I could stop in to the off licence & get some & down some before I came back. I knew I should of left the money at home but it made me feel safe having it.
On the walk I posted in here as I knew it was better to say it to someone. I walked & I thought sure I can just have a bit hopefully I will get the meds soon why deprive myself now before I start the meds what is the point of that ? Then I thought of my husband who is being so supportive & my promise to myself to never drink in secret again - that is at least over. I was walking towards the off licence & my dog turned off to go a different way & I went with her. I then walked home. Once home I knew I had done it as there was no alcohol in the house.
The evening was ok. I'll admit it would of been better with my usual hit. We watched a movie ordered food & I got a foot massage. Sounds really nice but it was missing but I did it. I actually did it. I would usually would drink tonight also but I think it wil be easier to not as the craving would be strong if I had of drank last night. I have an appointment with my doctor early tomorrow morning so I also want to have a clear head & at least at that point I can tell her I abstained for a week.
Again thank you all for your support here.
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