Sober Saturday

Posted , 10 users are following.

I didn't drink last night. It was hard at a couple of points when temptation nearly got the better of me but I didn't do it. The earlier part of the day i was optimistic - the drink monster was talking to me on & off saying my night would be boring without it. I tried to ignore it.

I practiced my dancing while my husband & Son watched the usual Saturday movie & had some popcorn. As I was finishing the drink monster started talking to me again. It was trigger time ! Every Saturday I would practice & it would be nearing bedtime for my son & while my husband but him to bed I would pour myself my first drink. There was no booze in the house so it wasn't an option. I decided to take the dog on the walk I had promised her & I put money in my pocket thinking I could stop in to the off licence & get some & down some before I came back. I knew I should of left the money at home but it made me feel safe having it. 

On the walk I posted in here as I knew it was better to say it to someone. I walked & I thought sure I can just have a bit hopefully I will get the meds soon why deprive myself now before I start the meds what is the point of that ? Then I thought of my husband who is being so supportive & my promise to myself to never drink in secret again - that is at least over. I was walking towards the off licence & my dog turned off to go a different way & I went with her. I then walked home. Once home I knew I had done it as there was no alcohol in the house.

The evening was ok. I'll admit it would of been better with my usual hit. We watched a movie ordered food & I got a foot massage. Sounds really nice but it was missing but I did it. I actually did it. I would usually would drink tonight also but I think it wil be easier to not as the craving would be strong if I had of drank last night. I have an appointment with my doctor early tomorrow morning so I also want to have a clear head & at least at that point I can tell her I abstained for a week. 

Again thank you all for your support here. 

xxx

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  • Posted

    Well guys just back from the docs. Feeling disappointed 😔. She hadn't heard of Selincro she only knew of Campral. She looked it up & NaxCame up which she didn't seem keen on. I explained Selincro is what is available in Ireland. She wants to research it more & make a decision & ive to come back to her on Monday next week & she said by then I will be nearly 2 weeks sober. She said I'm a week now so just keep going. I tried explaining yes I can keep going with that but this will change my attitude towards alcohol. It will still be waiting if I abstain whereas with the meds the crutch will be removed. I don't think she will prescribe. Next week she'll say you have done 14 days keep going. It's not 14 days I binge drink at the weekend not everyday.

    We might go to a Polish clinic as my husband is Polish & it can be easier to get a prescription there. I just want the meds so I can start treatment.

    • Posted

      Oh Sadie, I am so sorry. It took me weeks to get my prescription too. At the end I had to go back for another appointment and that last week was sooo long. Yes try the Polish clinic. 

      I have PMed you explanations and links so you can take these along next time and anywhere you try. You may have to pretend to take it as they have prescribed.....although that seems to get some results, not as high a percentage as TSM.....and then do it quietly by The Sinclair Method. 

      Your husband can read these links too to help him understand why you may have to or chose to take it differently to the way it is prescribed. Let me know if you found the links etc helpful.

    • Posted

      I really really appreciate that Sharon. I will have a look at the links in a while for sure & show my husband too.

      He is going to call the Polish clinic as a next step. After that it'll be trying to purchase online but I'm not sure if anywhere will send to Ireland . I may have had a better chance if I had lied & said I was drinking every day.

      Many thanks again xxx

    • Posted

       I know....stupid that you have to pretend to be a daily drinker in order to get help to avoid being one. Frustrating. Keep persevering......it has taken me months for anyone to take me seriously. I am having counselling too and to be honest she put in a 'good word for me'.

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