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Tearing during sex.

Posted , 60 users are following.

Sarahjosh
Sarahjosh

Hi I've had this problem for nearly 9 years now. I've been to many different doctors, and I still don't have an answer.

Basically every single time I have sex, that's even if I can have sex, I tear in my vaginal opening. Mainly the bottom part.

It can happen in foreplay, or trying to have sex.

I always make sure I'm lubed up, always go slow, try to be relaxed as possible, and stop when it gets sore. It just seems to tear almost straight away, over the tiniest bit of pressure. Then sometimes it burns when I wee afterwards, as the tears can be quite deep.

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 7 years, we've both been tested for STDs, I don't have thrush, and the doctors don't seem to be much help.

Even though we can't have sex, we are still sexually active, and have a happy healthy relationship, but as you can imagine not being able to have sex can be frustrating.

I have Different sized dildos to graduate slowly, and still this doesn't help.

So please if anyone knows why this is happening, it would be very very helpful.

I've been through all the obvious things, so maybe something more unusual/not very common is going on?

0 likes, 112 replies

112 Replies

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  • maggie93950
    maggie93950 Sarahjosh

    Posted

    HI, I've had this problem since I started having sex st 21 , I'm 44 now and have lost all hope. I Had a surgery done 2 years ago and it never helped. My doctors have all been dismissive. I've used the premirine creams and the lidocan cream. I love sex and wish i could enjoy it without pain and tearing. Having sex and then having to wait to heal is depressing. And the fact that these creams are not covered by insurance or that doctors are not interested in helping woman with their sexual health is in furiating.

    • irene28256
      irene28256 maggie93950

      Posted

      My dear Maggie I have had an operation as well for the same reason... My gyno was possitive that the problem would be solved if he had removed the forchette down there and he has done so. Then he prescribed an estriol cream which I Will have to use for the rest of my life in order to have sex. And guess what?? Nothing has changed. And now I am afraid to have sex and there is no desire for it. I really pray every night and believe into a miracle for me in order to become a normal sexy Lady again. I hope the same for all the Girls Who suffer from the same issue.. 🙁

  • christina17859
    christina17859 Sarahjosh

    Posted

    I sympathize with all the ladies in this forum. It is obvious a lot of women are suffering. And the fact it just started out of the blue for me, tells me there must be something were not connecting to the cause. Most people do not even know this problem exists. And why didn't we hear of this complaint years ago? Have women kept it secret? I don't think so. There has to be a cause.

  • daisy94207
    daisy94207 Sarahjosh

    Posted

    I've had a similar problem but not quite the same. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend and ended up with a two inch tear on my vaginal wall. I couldn't feel when it happened and it caused such tremendously heavy bleeding that it made me severely anemic. I was told it'd never happen again.

    So we tried again, and again I got a two inch tear on the other side of my vaginal wall. This again caused heavy bleeding, I had to have two blood transfusions and stitches.

    Both times the blood loss has left me severely ill and the whole experience was traumatic. I'm told by professionals again that this shouldn't happen again but it's hard to trust them after last time. It's been really hard to get through and I've struggled to find any answers or any who's been through anything similar, reading this forum helped me feel a little more normal.

  • irene28256
    irene28256 Sarahjosh

    Edited

    Hello Girls,

    I finally got answers and solution for this terrible issue we 've all had. The skin at the bottom part of the vaginal entrance is weak because of a skin disease. Since you all have done examinations but noone of the gynos found answers, the right doctor to help you is an aphrodisiologist or dermatologist. I have suffered 4 years now and the only cure for my issue was a steroid cream because the dermatologist was possitive that the problem was lichen sclerosus or lichen planus. No gyno can help you with that because they don't know how to deal with it. I finally can have sex with no fear and I feel so releaved. 😄😄😄

    • clau85
      clau85 irene28256

      Edited

      this information is very helpful! thank you so much!! i will definitely see someone about this problem as soon as i can! 😃

    • irene28256
      irene28256 clau85

      Edited

      Well, the doctor explained that this disease happens mostly on the genital. The skin becomes slowly slowly White and atrophic.. No collagen is produced and it looses its elasticity and it tears easily during intercourse. Unfortunately there is no certain cause why this happens and for some People there is no permanent cure. Anyway I feel happy to be a sexy woman again and I hope this never happens to me again. Moreover, I wish you all Girls find your cure and you all feel happy again in your life. Good luck!!!!

  • eg28771
    eg28771 Sarahjosh

    Posted

    I have had this problem for about 9 years, tried so many things, nothing worked! But finally, I stopped taking the pill (Gedarel, which I have been on for 13 years) and it has fixed it!! Not 100%, I would say 90%, which is just amazing. I hope this helps someone else

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