Temptation
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Hi, anyone have any personal mantras, hints or tips (or positive vibes) for when the desire to drink is just sudden and overwhelming?... I've been sober a couple of months now and I think maybe I've reached the end of the honeymoon phase. I've had a terrible day at work, to top off an awful week - and I just can't stop thinking 'I know alcohol will not take the problem away but right here right now a bottle of wine will help me escape this feeling for just an hour or two, which is better than nothing'. I'm trying to remind myself that; 1) Sobriety has been like a pearl I've been cultivating recently, enjoying it and feeling proud about it - if I chuck it away all for one drink I might not get it back, and that will just make everything feel worse in the long run. 2) The voice which is telling me to drink is representing a skewed reality, in a sense it's the voice of the addiction that was harming me, now it's trying to call me back. One drink (or four) will de-stress me tonight but in the long run it will represent a victory for my anxiety and stress, won't it? I'm posting on here because I really don't have anyone else to turn to in moments like this (but even writing the reasons down here is helping to stengthen my resolve).
1 like, 27 replies
pmcg21 peter97822
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Sparkle1234 peter97822
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Justme123 peter97822
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Sparkle1234 peter97822
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peter97822
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Also I think I can see that if I always react to problems (work related problems that arise due to external factors) by drinking and setting myself down a route of sadness/regret/guilt etc, then the bigger picture is that it's no wonder I end up feeling helpless, that external circumstances control me, and that I am a powerless individual. Time to enjoy taking back some control over how I choose to live my life...
Sparkle1234 peter97822
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pmcg21 peter97822
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ps- i have been sober since 2005- with the help of an addiction counsellor, who saved my life- this was my path to recovery-
Robin2015 peter97822
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liz05654 peter97822
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I have been soberish for 3 years. I stayed totally tee total for 18 months and felt great and then after a particularly bad medical examination I succumbed to the drink. It was a disaster. I really, really thought that a couple of glasses of wine would relax me. But no. 2 days later I was back to wanting more and more and more....
i thought that because I had gone 18 months I would be able to drink like a "normal" person! NO WAY. I can't do it. If I take one drink. I want more.
I always have this feeling that I love and crave a big long cold glass of white wine. It will alleviate all my problems. It will relax me. It will chill me out. I will feel all warm and cosy. And have that lovely, happy, chilled glow. Do you recognise the feeling?
BUT, it doesn't and can't stop there. Not if you have an inclination to alcohol like I do. I can't stop at that lovely feeling. I think that the lovely cosy warm feeling will get better. But it doesn't.
The lovely cosy feeling last for that first drink. And then it all goes downhill. I'm sure I don't need to tell you how or why. It just does. And then all that follows is guilt, self hatred, loathing and sometimes at its worst suicidal thoughts. Sorry to be harsh but it's true. Alcohol to an excess is a depressant.
BUT I too have had a hard
hard week. And I too am on my2nd bottle of wine. It doesn't happen very often. Probably once a month. I might carry on Tomoz. I might not. I hope not. I don't want to. But the drink grabs hold of you and it doesn't let go. If you have the strength to abstain please do. You can feel smug Tomoz. I will feel like a failure.
With regards to AA - please don't write it off as an option. When I finally admitted I had a serious problem, 3years ago,and nearly died, I went to AA for about 5 months. I went 5 or 6 days a week and it really really helped. I had this preconceived idea that it would be full of low lifes (sorry) but it wasn't. There were teachers, lawyers, doctors, accountants and yes a few street people (sorry). It was amazing. It helped enormously to enable me to realise i wasn't alone. It enabled me to keep off the booze. BUT talking about alcohol 6 nights a week, didn't work for me. Hearing every bodies stories about the things they had done under the influence sometimes made me laugh, cry and goddam sob. But all it did was reinforce my thoughts of alcohol. I needed to distance myself from it. Plus I didn't get the God stuff! Sorry, but if I was saved it was down to the people who saved me, not God.
I'll carry on in a min -need a wee!
Robin2015 liz05654
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liz05654 peter97822
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sometimes I think that after a hard 5 day week, I "deserve" a drink. This doesn't happen very often. Usually once a month these days. It never happened when I was going toAA so maybe that's the solution. But I found that when I went to AA! Even though I was wanting to stop drinking (and I did) all I ever thought about was alcohol. Listening to other people's stories, and most of the time they put a humorous spin on it, I thought well"actually I'm not that bad". So I'd think hey ho have a drink, you're not thtat bad! But what a load of bollocks!
You would not believe the stupid things I have done under the influence of alcohol. Things that I would never, ever,ever, think about when I am sober.
i will tell you the things I have done in a moment but please remember I am an extremely intelligent person (I am not just saying this, I am recognised in the UK). That sounds really big headed. But I really really don't mean to be. Ok I am intelligent but I am also an alcoholic. How bad is that?
liz05654 peter97822
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deirdre._03652 peter97822
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I really think that we need to change our mindset on our attitude to alcohol, we slip,.... we start again and again and again.... we are NOT BAD PEOPLE .. we just need a little understanding. To all of us out there, I never, never, never ever, thought that I would wake up sober every day... twelve years later I do ... you can too, huge, huge, huge hugs to others in this situation.... every, and I mean every person who tweets on here, can lend thsome eir great support to those who wake every month, hoping.
liz05654 peter97822
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PaulJTurner1964 peter97822
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PaulJTurner1964
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