Terrified of the damage I've done.. Rectocele
Posted , 4 users are following.
10/03/17 I gave birth to a healthy 8lb 110z boy. 1/09/18 I laparoscopic gallbladder surgery. I wish someone had been clearer about after surgery care, or pre OP care even. The day After surgery I was in so much pain because I needed to poop. I strained for two hours before I gave up and left to get a suppository . Still hard but I finally went for about 30 mins straight. Few days later,more problems and more pills. While wiping I felt a bulge in my vaginal opening. Of course I googled it. Recycle is the 1st thing that popped up. I've been reading about it ever since. I've tried getting into my OBGYN,no luck yet but I goto my primary care Dr Monday.
I know Google is bad but I'm almost 100% sure I hurt myself and am now officially screwed. I am terrified. I've read countless things about surgery, good and bad. Pessary inserts to support but not fix. Kegel exercising and so on. I'm so upset and have crying on and off all day. I'm 30 years old and have 2 kids. I can't just stop being a mom and have serious surgery. If anyone can offer any support, success stories living with this, pros for surgery ,just any real life experiences. Please I am literally sick with worry. Thank you .
2 likes, 16 replies
rodeojo ANA1988
Posted
oh poor you. first thing is for you to get a diagnosis going to see your primary care doc should clear up the matter.
Obviously keeping your bowels moving easily is a must. look at your diet you can add more fibre but also drink more water, eat more vegetables and do a little more gentle walking. I know its hare when you have little ones but dont panic. I have survived with a ring pessary for more than 5 years and am just booked for surgery now to deal with my prolapse. I have had bowel issues but did find the pessary , diet and exercises helpful in keeping it under control. Don't panic, deep breathing and get a diagnosis first then look at all your options. Take care of ANA.xxx
ANA1988 rodeojo
Posted
Thank you. To he honest I didn't even know this could happen. Of course I've heard of prolapse in other ways but not rectocele. I just feel so gross and defeated. I didn't need anything else to worry about. Its pretty uncomfortable right now. Also I've been taking a daily 4 oz glass of prune juice, it's disgusting but its regulated my bowels better than any form of laxative or still softener. I guess I've scared myself because I've been reading about it every chance I got and Google doesn't hold back on the explicit pictures , whether related to my issue or not. I hope you don't mind me asking you a few questions. How severe was your prolapse? Was the ring uncomfortable? I heard about vaginal ulcers using the Pessary inserts , did that happen ? Can you still have sex with one in? Also how in the world would that work? I hardly slept last night. I know you said take a breath but I'm so worried. Who wants to be with a 30 year old with a messed up vagina? My fiance seems fine, but there's always that thought. We've been for almost 12 years, what if this is what ruins us 😞
rodeojo ANA1988
Posted
Rosa747 ANA1988
Posted
Try not to panic. If there is just a bulge with no other symptoms then things may not be so bad? Make sure you see a urogynaecologist rather than a regular OBGYN as they have much more training in prolapse. I'm not sure if you need to see your regular OBGYN first or can go directly to a urogynaecologist? Hopefully your primary care provider may confirm what the problem might be on Monday. If it is a rectocele then they may think you will benefit from womens physio too to help with kegals. It is nice to have regular appointments with physio as you discuss all about your prolapse and progess of improving it. Don't blame yourself as there will have been a weakness there and something would have triggered it eventually, mine was intense gym! I'm in 30s too with 2 kids but mine has stopped me doing my usual daily activities as I get a lot of pain and discomfort, rectocele too. Keep us updated x
ANA1988 Rosa747
Posted
I'm definitely panicking. I've read so many different things and even so many botched images on Google. I don't even know if they were related but no woman wants a botched vagina. Especially at 30. How is sex for you? I know something caused it and I'm positive it was giving birth just 3 months before the horrible constipation after surgery. I wish I had been told to take the stool softner even if I never had an issue with opioid constipation. I will ask my Dr about a urogynecologist. I'm positive ill need a referral. Any doctor that's not for normal reasons here need you to have a referral. My hubby needed one for the heart dr. I have some pain mostly from pushing on it to relieve some trapped stuff .... Gross. How does physical therapy correct it? Thank you.
ANA1988
Posted
Well I'm able to go to the bathroom now. So that's back on track. This will sound weird but I think I may have an anterior as well. This is to much info but when I feel around in there I can feel something weird besides the rectocele. I can't find anything that shows me what either look like on a real woman. The only way I can even find a normal picture of a vagina is to Google porn , how messed up is that? Its been so long since I messed around down there since before I gave birth in October that I just can't remember what's right anymore. I feel better that the ring wasn't miserable to have sex with. Also I'm glad your husband couldn't feel it. I'm still scared. I know there are different levels of prolapse but like I said i can't find any pictures or examples of these. Its driving me crazy. I see my family Dr Tomorrow. I looked up specialists for this and they're all almost 2 hours away. I don't know why stuff can't just go right for me. Ill update after My Dr Tomorrow at 6pm. Thanks again.
Rosa747 ANA1988
Posted
The physiotherapist just checks you are doing the kegals correctly and monitors your pelvic floor strength. Some mild prolapses can get smaller with regular kegals because it's the weakness in the pelvic floor muscles which need strengthening and it can pull the prolapse up. Sex can only happen if I have a day when I'm feeling low symptoms and usually evenings are out the question as I feel too uncomfortable. I feel uncomfortable at the bulge area but sex isn't painful. It has been hard to come to terms with this but Ive had to accept that its how things are for now. I might consider surgery. I haven't tried pessary cos my consultant said he didn't think it would work with the way mine is. It could be a solution though if it is suggested to you and could be a temporary solution if you do end up needing surgery but not ready. You mention the botches and that's why any surgery is best carried out by urogynaecologist cos that's their speciality. Some of them are gynaecologists with urogynaecology qualification. Try not to worry and have a list of things to ask your healthcare provider.
ANA1988 Rosa747
Posted
Ill have to look them up. The special gyno is 2 hours away , so I'm assuming that therapy person will be too. I really hope the ring will work. I wish I could find examples of the different levels of prolapse. But Google is useless. I'm sorry sex doesn't happen for you. I'm so scared my hubby won't want me if I can't have sex, I know its ridiculous but I'm insecure. Also I just realized , how will I have a period? Will thus prolapse block it? Like I seriously don't know. I know u say dont worry but I'm so tired of things going wrong. I just want to cry. Thanks again.
Rosa747 ANA1988
Posted
Your period will be the same even with prolapse. Just cos sex is difficult for me doesn't mean that it would be same for you or someone else with a prolapse. My urogynae said I should engage in intercourse cos its good for muscles and it won't make prolapse any worse. I went through all the same feelings you are as I didn't think I could ever manage sex at all as I could hardly walk when it first happened 8 months ago after an intense gym class. I think hubby thought the same. Pain improved with physio so hubby just glad we can even do it at all! Let us know how you get on later
ANA1988 Rosa747
Posted
Yours does sound very severe. Mine isn't that bad. It actually didn't hurt for awhile until two-days ago. But that's related to the vaseline I put on my sore butt. Didn't realize it was scented and it screwed up my bacteria. The slightest change and I get an instant infection. I'm glad sex can help. Maybe if I get enough lube that will help too. I just hope it doesn't weird him out. Thank you for talking to me. I'm feeling okay so far today.
Dlee2001 ANA1988
Posted
I am 18 weeks post op for rectocele surgery along with six other procedures. Laying down is truly my only pain reliever after surgery. It’s no fun. Hang in there. You have support with this group.
ANA1988 Dlee2001
Posted
Prune juice is horrible. I will try your mixture next time. So far I seem to be back on track and going with ease. Usually nothing constipated me. I mean nothing , not cheese not anything. Until after they took out my gallbladder. Weird. I'm sorry you have to go through all that. How does you rectocele repair feel? Would you have bee capable of caring for children while recovering? Probably not... Especially an almost 4 month old. I hope I can use the ring. Ill let everyone know what my Dr says tomorrow. Also I'm glad I found this group. The site doesn't work well on my phone though. Thank you.
Dlee2001 ANA1988
Posted
If you want to find photos about your symptoms, look up pelvic organ prolapse or urogynecology surgical procedures. There are lots of videos on YouTube regarding pelvic organ prolapse surgeries. If you decide to have the surgery, please make sure you understand what to do before and after surgery so you don’t risk the surgery failing. I’m not going to lie, the surgery is painful afterwards and difficult to handle., even without kids. Good luck
ANA1988 Dlee2001
Posted
Prune juice is horrible. I will try your mixture next time. So far I seem to be back on track and going with ease. Usually nothing constipated me. I mean nothing , not cheese not anything. Until after they took out my gallbladder. Weird. I'm sorry you have to go through all that. How does you rectocele repair feel? Would you have bee capable of caring for children while recovering? Probably not... Especially an almost 4 month old. I hope I can use the ring. Ill let everyone know what my Dr says tomorrow. Also I'm glad I found this group. The site doesn't work well on my phone though. Thank you.
ANA1988 Dlee2001
Posted
Well surgery isn't happening. Period. There's no way I could handle it, especially right now. I was miserable after gallbladder surgery and I can't imagine after this. I hope you feel better soon. Thank you i will try to look that up instead. I don't know why but I have to see what is possibly going to happen. Thanks.