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The answer to how long this recovery will take!!!!!

Posted , 14 users are following.

rose0000
rose0000

I have been at my absolute wits end trying to hurry this recovery along, why is it taking so long simply to get to the loo, why is it taking so long to simply move my leg, why on earth can I not walk far without pain....and so the list went on and on and on....

In hindsight, at the grand age of five months post op I can see EXACTLY why I rushed my recovery, why I was so impatient to be better, why I was constantly measuring myself against everyone and anyone else.

I was terrified I would not get better, I was terrified quietly that I would never walk, never rid myself of the pain, limp or both.....deep inside I was scared I would be forever disabled.

Looking back this fear must be completely natural and happens to the best of us, but actually five months on I WISH I had been more gentle, more patient, less worried and spent my time resting, relaxing and taking my time with the process. It is the most natural thing in the world to want to be better of course, but please everyone have some confidence that you WILL get there, all time frames are different, all journeys vary slightly - be gentle with yourself, when you feel better make the most of the time off (no one gives a damn three months in trust me) Enjoy the time with your loved ones and family and be reassured you would know about it if something was wrong....so rest, relax, exercise, take care and be patient. It is all okay. You will get there, you really will....

15 likes, 53 replies

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  • lin50729
    lin50729 rose0000

    Posted

    Well said. I will think of your words when l am rushing myself on at 7 weeks x x
    • rose0000
      rose0000 lin50729

      Posted

      Fear is a great motivator to get out of bed and do the exercises, but it can also be counter productive if we are afraid, and worried, pushing to be better 'just to see' what the result of this operation will be.

      I pushed myself way beyond my limits many, many times and look back and wished I hadn't. It hampers recovery, puts you at risk - best simply to accept where we are at any given time, trust that the surgery will get us back on our feet soon...easier said than done, but I know for next time.

      Wishing you well at 7 weeks, you getting there! I hope you are feeling well? 

  • linda38528
    linda38528 rose0000

    Posted

    Beautifully written Rose,

    I think we may also be pressured (without others intending or us realizing) by well meaning people that cannot possibly realize the profound nature of the recovery journey (physical and emotional) that we travel. In my own case (and others I know), both hips were in very bad condition but many people somehow seem to expect that I will be all better after the first operation and usually within weeks. Do I need to to tell you that this hasn't quite been my experience?!!

    And then I imagine Sarah's situation and expectations and misunderstandings she has faced - no wonder she wants to be fully recovered NOW!!!

    Anyway - I will be face the second operation witha a slightly adjusted set of expectations - of the operation, recovery and myself.

    Thanks Rose.   

    • rose0000
      rose0000 linda38528

      Posted

      Absolutely Linda, I feel the same, 'I will know the second time around', the second time around I will be much more relaxed, and will know that it all comes in good time.

      At the time I didn't know I was so afraid the operation would not work, and could not pin point my anxiety. 

      You are absolutely right that many people treat this operation like a broken leg or similar, it is not, nothing like it. Other people's expectations, and managing them was a part of this recovery I was not expecting.

      he recovery is far more drawn out with a THP than I ever realised, hence my feeling of not getting better quick enough, add in the pressure from others and you soon feel that you are doing so well. In reality you are recovering perfectly, and in complete tune with your body.

      It can not be hurried or rushed. The emotional aspect is the double whammy most do not expect. 

      I can walk for miles now, barely know my replacement is there when I look after it. I am going for my first picnic today, and although I am a little worried about how I will manage if it is miles away with the baskets etc, or quite how I will get down the floor and back up again 'elegantly'....I know now to leave when I get tired now regardless of the opinion of others whom have probably completely forgotten this operation even took place!! 

       

    • Fernlady
      Fernlady rose0000

      Posted

      I didn't think 'elegant' was a word I would ever use again! X
    • renee01952
      renee01952 rose0000

      Posted

      Are you observing Whitsun or Pentecost in the UK ? They didn't in L.A. but here in Holland they do .. Sunday and Monday off - 

      the weather here is so cold and nasty after gorgeous hot days - I hope the weather will be beautiful where you are -Picnic sounds lovely -

      make sure to not carry too heavy baskets - do you have a pull wagon or something? 

      have fun - this is why you went on this journey

      warm big hug

      renee

       

    • rose0000
      rose0000 Fernlady

      Posted

      If you can call rolling onto the grass legs all over the place muttering obscenties, in a dress I might add, followed by trying to get up on all fours in front of everyone in a white linen dress....then elegant might be a word you would use if you were very very drunk, or had exceptionally low standards!

      To the rest of the world I think they wondered what on earth was going on with the weird woman rolling around at two in the afternoon, or maybe they thought I was getting into a position to give birth! Heavens it wouldnt be too much of a stretch of the imagination with the extra pounds gained. Either way the first time I attempted to sit on the grass in public was a social catastrophe, mental note to self - never again.

      Took cheap plastic travel chair this time to avoid the acute embarrassment this time around. At least now the hip has been replaced I can actually get out of the damn thing. Pre op, I broke the arm off heaving myself out of it!!! That was another great moment to cherish!

      Oh the glamour of it all Fern!!!! :0

    • rose0000
      rose0000 renee01952

      Posted

      Renee it went well! I didn't publicly shame myself this time...and had a very helpful daughter to help carry the chairs, bags, jumpers etc - the weather was nice. Is it not warming up in Holland??? I imagine the tulips swaying in fresh spring sunshine....

      Picnics and such like do help you remember there is life after this. I hear the birds sing now, I couldn't before, and life has come back into some focus now. How are you feeling lovely?

    • Fernlady
      Fernlady rose0000

      Posted

      Lol Rose, I now have a mental image of a vision in white linen frolicking on the floor! X
    • rose0000
      rose0000 Fernlady

      Posted

      That sounds almost poetic until you think about the fact I can't cross my legs like a lady any longer! 
  • renee01952
    renee01952 rose0000

    Posted

    dearest Rose,

    wow. .what a journey it has been ,..you have come a long way, darling. ..

    you can be proud of a job well done. ..

    big warm hug

    Renee ❤ 👀. .

  • mike37250
    mike37250 rose0000

    Posted

    Rose0000,

    I think that is the best post that I have read that hits me exactly how I feel. My surgery is coming up soon and I fear I will be worse off than I am right now. The pressure to get better and back to work in a timely manner scares me. At my job I have three months to recover or risk losing my position. That scares me as well. But at the end of the day I need to take your advice and heal, rest and recuperate in order to be better and not rush it.

    Fear is there but your post puts me more at ease with recovering.

    Thanks,

    Mike

    • rose0000
      rose0000 mike37250

      Posted

      Mike, really your employers are saying that? Do they know what a major operation it is? I wonder if you should email a link of a THP on you tube to your manager so he can share the experience with you, he might change his position a little after that.

      What kind of work do you do if you don't mind me asking?

      Try not to rush, because no job in the world is going to be worth losing your one chance to be completely healthy again. It is counter productive, but especially for you..... you would be almost better moving jobs than risking this operation going badly because you did too much too soon. Everything depends on you being active and well again, so that is your first priority.

      You rush this operation at your peril. It has a time frame of it's own, and you soon learn to tow the line.

      In the UK the GP will decide if you are well enough, and if you are not they can sign you off, is it possible for your employers can make arrangements to help you with slowly coming back to work when you can?

      Try not to worry - I felt really quite well at 12 weeks, but you will need to rest, and may need to adjust your hours/days/journey depending on what you do.

      Best of luck, and remember look after you and not them! 

  • Patrick_h
    Patrick_h rose0000

    Posted

    Thanks Rose, That encouragement is just what I needed to hear.I am 5 months post op but cannot work full days standing on my feet yet.Patience is something we all struggle with but it's good to be reminded that we are all on this journey together. Bless you
    • rose0000
      rose0000 Patrick_h

      Posted

      Bless you Patrick. I am not surprised you can't stand all day yet....I don't think I could either. Luckily I am sitting down, but too much of that isn't good either.

      Are you feeling quite well in yourself? Slowly coming together?

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