The end

Posted , 13 users are following.

Ive had problems after mono for 25 months now. Still relapsing after just going to bed at 2 AM instead if 11pm. If it doesnt end till the Christmas, Im going to end it myself by suicide. Everyone here recovered by this amount of time. Im fed up with dealing with it and Ill finally make it stop. 

2 likes, 25 replies

Report / Delete

25 Replies

Next
  • Posted

    Hi Lob,

    I really wish things would improve for you, you must be so weary and frustrated, it is understandable to feel like this it really is, I was worried when you said about ending it with suicide, please I really hope you are not thinking about that there is hope and plenty to live for Lob - you are going to get through this. It's understandable for this to get you so low to a point you just don't want to keep struggling on, I do believe you're going to get better still I just really get a strong feeling for that and want you to know that - hang on in there we don't know why we have to go through these such trials, sometimes it feels like we pray and asking God and it just seems silent on the other end. But trust me He's there Lob and He wants you well, God has a good purpose for you still and is an expert in shaping terrible situations into positive ones even when it seems impossible that it could be the case - leave it with Him and don't give up.

    Please please talk to someone you trust or seek help if you are feeling that way Lob - I understand why you would feel that way and it must be so awful and despairing. But there IS hope and there IS recovery still for you Lob - and even if you're at the stage now when you can't see it or believe it for yourself, let others take the strain, I believe it for you and just cope with one day at a time don't look too far ahead.

    I just hate how this awful virus makes people feel, wish I could take it away from you Lob and just make it disappear. It just seems you have been so unlucky in that it has went on and on and on, but that doesn't mean it won't ever go away - I would say although I was a lot better than you are by the stage you are at now, I still wasn't 100% and looking back a few years after that I had improved drastically still. Not giving in doesn't mean to say you have to be up and active and fighting it in its face everyday, sometimes not giving it just means rest - it's okay to rest, that's not quitting, but don't give up because you ARE going to get through this man I totally believe that still. The relapses are horrible but my experience was that after a few years they disappeared completely - hoping and praying and believing that can and will be the case for you.

    Remember God knows the bigger picture - He cares about you man and has a purpose for you - this thing might feel like it's winning at the moment, but it won't win the war - it will be defeated and you will get your life, health and happiness back again. I truly truly 100% believe that for you Lob, even if you can't see it right now - just hold on man I know it's hard to keep holding on I know man, but don't beat yourself up and remember it's okay to rest and slow the pace of life down for a while until things steady out - which I completely believe they will. I know you need some respite now so praying for that for you Lob and please keep in touch let us know how you are doing - I for one care and will pray right now for your complete healing from God.

    Craig

     

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Today I'm praying for the full recovery of Lob, that this awful virus ceases it's assignment RIGHT NOW and vanishes out of his life and allows him to live a healthy and happy life again. I'm praying for blessings and recovery and restoration for Lob and that this physical, emotional and mental burden is removed from him, and that you protect him and sustain him and heal him totally God. In Jesus' name, Amen.

    FORUM GUYS.....I NEED YOUR HELP. The more people the better. The Bible says that if two people on earth agree in their prayers and requests in Jesus name it shall be done for them. Please agree with me in this prayer. I stand in agreement with anyone who says they agree and I believe that Lob will be healed. Even if it's not instant, it might take a bit of time, however God wants it to - but healing is going to happen in Lob's life.

    Please post guys please agree with our prayers.

    Craig

     

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi Lob,

    i stand in agreement with Craig and Brent. 

    I have no idea what your life is about or who you have in your life but we very much care on this forum and there is definate light at the end of the dark tunnel you're in right now.  

    I think it's great to talk about troubles, to share them with us if you can't with others close to you. Sometimes that seems easier. And that way they become smaller. I really  hope you are ok. 

    We are thinking about you

    x

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Absolutely agreeing with Caroline and the guys - we very much care about you Lob and I know the guys know what it's like to go through mono, and there is life on the other side of it even after a lengthy period of time. And remember resting isn't giving up. It's okay to give yourself an easier time and not expect loads of yourself. Sometimes your body just needs things to be simple for a while, and that's okay - trusting that things will get better again in the future, I truly believe they will.

      Craig

      Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    I know your pain. I have thought about it several times myself. I have been sick almost as long as you. I went through a divorce while dealing with this illness (married 19 years). I miss a lot of things that I was able to do but can’t do anymore. I just keep pushing. I get very weary at times. I just try to get through one day at a time. It’s hard sometimes but I keep trying.
    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi Lob, please know you are not alone. We all know how isolated and misunderstood we are by friends and loved ones who have not had this long horrific painful miserable, physical, mental and emotional devastating and debilitating virus! I encourage you to go to you tube and search for Toby Morrison and listen to his CFS recovery videos. He talks about how people who go through this have suicidal thoughts.

    We care and want you to know we care. Learning how to lessen the frequency and severity of them is a big help. I'm 21 months in and a 2 o'clock bed time would definitely spend me into a relapse! I feel I'm 95% better but I feel it when I get in bed past 8 o'clock! You must work with your body but you will get well!

    Praying for strength, peace, wisdom and courage to endure as your body recovers!

    Rhonda

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi Lob we all care you are not alone! We know how it feels to have this painful, horrific, debilitating virus! We know how it feels to be misunderstood and alone! Only those of us who have it or had it truly know how devastating it is! I encourage you to go to you tube and search Toby Morrison CFS recovery video. He talks about what expressed your feelings were. There are other helpful ones. I listen to one almost everyday.

    I'm 21 months in and I'm sure a 2 am bedtime would throw me into a relapse and I feel I'm 95% better but I can feel it when I am past 8 pm getting into bed!

    Learning how to lessen the severity and the length of our relapses is very helpful!

    You will get well! I pray for added courage, strength peace and endurance as your body recovers from the wounds physically and emotionally this horrible virus has inflicted upon you and all of us on this forum! You will get well! We all care!

    Prayers Rhonda

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Lob not sure why my last two replays are waiting moderator approval? I care! You will recover!

    Prayers, Rhonda

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Dear Lob,

    I know that this is such a long miserable road and that you feel like giving up, I felt so miserable for so long that I thought it would never end, but one day it just lightened and every month has been better, please ask for a referral to an infectious disease doctor. Never, never give up, come to the forum and talk to us, many people have been sick for long long periods and have recovered. The relapsing last for a while, my daughter is going through this too. I like to think that a relapse is just the immune system having a glitch but the immune system does know this virus and eventually it will beat it into submission.

    Everyone hear cares about you and understands.

     

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Definitely Mono and Rhonda,

      It's so hard to hang on during this virus when you reach your lowest ebb and just don't feel like you have the strength to keep struggling on feeling awful physically and emotionally. There's no words that can describe how tough it is at those times.

      Those times do pass, they really do Lob, it's hard to grasp that I know and even think clearly when in the midst of it. You can't do anything but just hang on and take each day and hour and moment as it comes. Remember you are going to get better, I still believe that for you and everyone who has posted here in all sincerety - God is there and says that after a little while of suffering will restore us - He is faithful to His promises and hang in there, thinking of you and hoping for a better day today.

      Craig

      Report / Delete Reply

Join this discussion or start a new one?

New discussion Reply

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the forums to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the forums are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the forums is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.

newnav-down newnav-up