The torture

Posted , 9 users are following.

I guess I should thank God that a friend fom out of state called the police yesterday I was in SCHOCK and I wasn't very helpful to the police....cause again, I was in bad shape...and still am.  One grabbed a beer from me and I stupidly got it all over him....can crushing and he became a little upset.

​He said there went my chances of smoking a cig prior to leaving.

​UGH...the recovery progress is not as good as I would like...I can't eat today...barely drinking water...All kinds of Drs calling...I can't move....But, I'm not drinking alcohol....

​Trying to focus on the TV and praying the hours move faster...to the next day of recovery.

0 likes, 58 replies

58 Replies

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  • Posted

    One of these days you won't make it. You gotta get a grip and do something.
    • Posted

      Yes, your absolutely right and that was the purpose of my friend calling yesterday I was at a point of giving up.  I'm not saying I feel like I can keep doing this at all.  Just sharing the pain for myself and for anyone that is struggling...this is just a place where I can vent about it....
    • Posted

      Missy, my heart just broke that someone cared about you so much. I have those people in my life too. Maybe we need to work together and let God help us. Missy, I'm still drinking and hate myself for it but still smiling as usual. Lets work together. I feel a bond with you for some reason. Help me and let me help you!
    • Posted

      Hi Kelly...I'm sorry you are still drinking sad....My stomach so nauseas....Stop drinking before it affects your job.  I'm glad you can identify with me...but not glad that you are suffering.

      I also feel a bond with you too....go to bed early tonight.

       

    • Posted

      yea for some reason while we are drinking everything is ladee da...and then WHAM...the world caves in.
    • Posted

      I'm just tired. Sick and tired. Getting to that point where I'm ready to stop again. Will have to fill you in on outpatient therapy. Right now I'm going to bed. Only day to sleep in tomorrow and I have a dentist appt. Yes plenty of them yet! Plus I had to make an appt for another steroid injection in my lower back. I had a bulging disc and 6 months ago I had a shot. Pain is coming back. Somehow I need a way to deal with stress. Hope you have a good night.
    • Posted

      This is my third time trying to respond.  Dentist yuk....sleeping late...good. I slept late today for me....1030.  No appetite yet.

      ​Like I'm told...if we deal with the things bothering us (like pain in back), our lives are less stressful...therefore less need to drink.

      ​But what about the days when I just WANT to drink?  Good that you have a flexible schedule and VERY bad in another way.

    • Posted

      Are you drinking?

      Pain is awful.  I think as soon as I get this upper denture finished and the injection in my lower back I'll be free of some stress.  That will take about 2 weeks which is O.K. because my outpaitent one on one and group therapy starts in 2 weeks.  I will feel guilty drinking during those sessions.  

      I'm calling my doctor today or tomorrow to see if I can make an appt to get the naltrexone.  Have to start somewhere.

      You're right about the flexible schedule.  Good in some ways but definitely bad in other ways.

    • Posted

      Glad to have you back with us, Missy! Hang in there, keep posting if you can. Sent you a PM about the computer.
    • Posted

      Kelly, I thought I'd wait until Misssy has a good connection again and has her sea-legs under her. In the meantime I'll be glad to tell you about anything I can help with. 
    • Posted

      If you have any questions, fire away, otherwise I'll just talk a bit here.

      Alcohol Deprivation Effect describes the tendency to return to drinking after a period of abstinence. Usually what happens is people with AUD will end up relapsing harder than anytime prior. Generally , the longer the period of abstinence, the harder the relapse. If you look up the term, you'll see a number of studies on rats, along with some studies on humans. If you look into your experience, you'll have read about the stories online, in the newspaper, magazines and on television, possibly you've seen it in or heard about it from some friends/acquaintances, even family members. Certainly if you go through the discussions here at Patient, you will see that same story, time and time again. People "dry up" for weeks, months or even years, only to return to the drink and bury themselves harder than before. Then back into rehab to have another go at it, with predictable results. This is what happens with about 90% of people that have a serious run-in with alcohol. About 10% can manage wiith straight abstinence and willpower, maybe some social support. 

       

    • Posted

      Thanks Adefree. VERY interesting with the rats and trial etc and how hard it is to stay sober. What are my predictions after 3 1/2 years sober? Any bets?? Furthermore, I do wish MISSY all the best and this is my 2nd post to try and convince her to recovery in whatever way possible..pls try...Robin
    • Posted

      Now, the one thing about the rats is that although they ramp up their intake initially, they drop back to their previous levels after a bit, so it seems they might have a bit better self-regulation built in. Humans, otoh, oi vey!

      Now, I don't know much about your history with alcohol, so can't really offer much, but if you gave us a recap, I'd love to hear your story! Especially after you've lent so much support here, you surely deserve your own topic!

    • Posted

      unemployed both my wife and I and that was 4 yrs ago and twins ages 1 1/2....yes tiny...drinking too much and DESTROYING my family surely and DAD visiting at XMAS very very sick and had not seen for 2 yrs plus and vodka vodka...stopped 31st dec 2012 and NOTHING since then..proud??yes!! Sorted..regards Robin
    • Posted

      Well done, Robin! Yes, you should be proud! You've made a clean break with it and you're making it stick!

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