Thoughts
Posted , 2 users are following.
I am becoming more convinced depression anxiety to caused by what we think about but where thoughts come from I do not know.
Mine started when I moved house many years ago , with flare up since.
Today had a good day out but stepping back in my house then flash back. frightening thoughts.
I know with my wise mind there is nothing wrong here as my husband has nothing wrong with him and would refuse to move. and I fear it would be wrong.
Stuck .
Thank you for allowing me to share this with you all.
I have been feeling better lately on Sertraline
1 like, 9 replies
dodo81786 chris80549
Posted
what makes you fear the house ?
if you dont mind me asking .
chris80549 dodo81786
Posted
to dodo81786
As a child living in a house which I felt was poor, jealous of friends who moved to new Council House.
single parent family, good mother.
From child determined to get a nice house. worked hard to get my dream
house. Lots arguments with hubby to keep moving. he didnt want to move.
Arrived stressed, big mortgage, bought things in panic that werent right worried over that. Money was short had to work harder.
Bang. Now blamed myself for everything moving etc. Guilt trip. Panic Depression hit.
Struggled since . often feel guilty for things not my fault
Husband now settled here and doesnt understand Mental Health.
Im trying hard now to think positive and count my blessing.
Im sure Sertraline is helping.
And Sues reply I was pleased to read I will get better.
..
sue74917 chris80549
Posted
hi chris. I too felt like this about my home, that I have lived in for many years, to the extent that I would wander around aimlessly rather then go home. I think in my case it might be to do with, home is where I first felt unwell and had my very first panic attack so maybe a deep seated association? if it is any comfort this does pass as you recover and I am now, once again, perfectly at ease at home
chris80549 sue74917
Posted
Sue.74917
oh Sue. Thank you. thank you so much. what you have written is exactly what has happened to me
yes, I think its a deep seated association with the first time it happened.
Now any other problems hits me the same and it all comes back.
Im on 100mg Sertraline now about 10 wks. and feeling more positive and motivated but a few nervy thoughts in the day but a lot less.
Have you any other advice.
Like psychiatrist etc.
I know Im dwelling on things too much, thats why Im on this site so much.
Iv been fighting it for several years.
I have lovely friends and neighbours
around here and my husband likes it here. Also quite daunting to start in a new place.
Thank you again
Im going to try and save your writing to remind me it will pass.
sue74917 chris80549
Posted
Chris you are more then welcome, that is what we are all here for to try and help each other. I completely understand what you mean about it all coming flooding back, the fear of going backwards is sometimes stronger then the fear we first felt when this illness and side effects took hold. I am a little ahead of you, 13 weeks and although I still play devils advocate in my mind and test my feelings nothing physically happens, I believe that is the medication working. Today I have the biggest proof, have had a pain in between my shoulder blades and as us anxiety suffers do, goggled it, well that was it, I was having a heart attack at best, at worse it was lung cancer! Now in the past I would have got dizzy, lightheaded and very anxious and would have run for the hills in blind panic, ......... nothing happened, I just thought oh well if it gets worse or is still hurting in a couple of days I will get it checked out. This is how the meds help you, the rest is up to you, let your wise head take over for a bit, think of your house as a home, make small plans in what you would like to do with it, paint a room, change the curtains, if money is tight give yourself a little challenge in changing things as cheaply as you can. You say you have seen some progress with your recovery, you will see more as time goes on.
chris80549 sue74917
Posted
to Sue.
Thank you very much.
Wishing you a continued good health .
chris80549 sue74917
Posted
Hi Sue or anyone on site.
have you had this problem of testing your self.
been quite good for a few days. Walked to surgery this morning with neighbour chatting . Felt Iv turned the corner.
Spoke to soon. came in . Just before lunch looking down in cupboard felt light headed, lasted until 3.30 ish.
Just washing hair and thought probably a virus and thought I did well today the nasty word is gone. As soon as I thought its gone, it came back.
why am I testing myself and doing it to myself. Now Im shaking.
But before Sertraline it was constant.
so Iv just told myself it will be gone completely in time.
One swallow doesnt make a summer. So one nasty word isn't making you go back where you were.
Does anyone else test them self like this.
How to control it.
sue74917 chris80549
Posted
hi Chris. I am so pleased you had a fairly good day, recovery comes in waves and trust me they do get longer and stronger. Yes testing is all part of it, I used to do it quite a lot, think of it as a bit like wet paint signs, how many of us want to touch it to see if it is? Or another way to look at it is your little devil on your shoulder trying to make you bad again, as the meds settle down more in your system that little devil will disappear in a puff of smoke. Try not to give much importance to those thoughts and they will soon get fed up and clear off. You are doing well and so close to being you again
chris80549 sue74917
Posted
Thank you Sue. Your a great help.