Today starts 8 weeks.....

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I seriously feel like I am wasting away. I am still struggling with appetite. It is going to take until next week to get the results of the c diff test. I haven't had a good nights sleep in well, I don't know when. I am having to force myself to eat. I am always freezing to the point of wearing sweats and socks to bed. I have constant gas. As of today I am down 17 pounds. I still run low grade fevers on and off all day. The sad thing is, a lot of the c diff symptoms are similar to mono so I don't know if I am still suffering from mono or the c diff or both. I keep entertaining the idea of going to the hospital but everyone keeps telling me there isn't anything they can do. When I saw my doctor last week he didn't seem overly concerned but I am losing my mind. I managed to stay mostly out of bed yesterday than in but not sure that helped because I feel worse today than I did yesterday. I feel like this is never going to end. My house is going to hell and I seriously need to do laundry. With taking in so few calories every day I don't have the energy or strength. Not to mention I am tired. I think I keep wanting to go to the hospital because I know if something happens while I am there I am good to go. So that is my update. Sucks to be me sad

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  • Posted

    Thinking about you Wendi. I had a horrible bout with C diff in 2002 from an appendectomy gone  wrong. I was in so many antibiotics to clear my

    Infection from a burst appendix.

    Did the dr out you on a counter antibiotic to clear a possible c diff infection? 

    Having Mono is an absolute nightmare. I’m so sorry you are having a hard time. Wish we could all give one another an encouraging hug. 

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    • Posted

      I think the doctor wanted to make sure I actually have it before he gave me something for it since my symptoms aren't too bad.

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  • Posted

    Wendi-

    I truly hate this for you. I think I'm about a month or so ahead of you in this misery, but I couldn't eat for the longest time either but that did get better. Dr mentioned to me trying Boost nutrition drink. Not sure if you've tried something like that. I told my husband the same thing everyday that I was wasting away.

    My house is a complete disaster. Baskets of laundry everywhere. I can get them washed and dried but forget putting it all away. My poor husband and parents are doing everything they can, and are worn out.

    At least you were out of the bed for most of the day, that must have felt good. I did more today than I have in a long time but back in bed now completely worn out. And I'm just talking about doing dishes, making my own lunch and putting away groceries. But I guess that's something...

    I know we will get through but it's taking forever. I'm literally watching the seasons change from my bedroom window.

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    • Posted

      So sorry to hear you have been feeling so worn out too Meredith, just remember things won't always be this way and you ARE going to get through this. I believe it for you 100% even if it's hard to see it yourself right now. It has helped me so much in the past when I can't see a way out of a situation if someone else prays for me or believes it for me, that is such a comfort and a support.

      I definitely pray for you and Tabitha and everyone on the forum and totally believe you are going to get through this and will have full health back once this stormy trial is over (which is will be).

      Craig

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    • Posted

      Oh Meredith, I know you have been suffering too sad I wish there were something I could do to make this all better. I might try Boost.....I have tried other supplemental drinks but they upset my stomach really bad. I have to avoid dairy right now and I think most of the supplements have whey would I believe is an issue. Plus I am lactose intolerant. 

      And I feel you about watching the seasons change. I missed out on spring hiking and now I have to wait for fall sad Hopefully I will be back to my old self by then. 

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    • Posted

      Wendi-

      We WILL be back to our normal selves by fall! We are whipping this thing. I'm trying to remain positive on this rainy day smile Where do you hike? We are from Raleigh, NC. Supposed to be at the beach for the long holiday weekend, but well you know where I am instead. 

      I've been reading a book (site will not let me mention title) related to EBV -mono and it says to cut all dairy and gluten out. I'm trying to eat all fruit, veggies and protein. See how that goes and if it helps.

      I hope you're having a better day and getting some sleep.

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    • Posted

      Great stuff Meredith, you're right you guys are going to beat this thing. Remember though sometimes the full-on attack style doesn't work for this, i.e. trying to get up and push through it - think it often requires a smarter approach as rest is key and removing stress and not wasting energy etc. I know it's much easier said than done!

      Thinking of you and hoping things settle for you and for a good day.

      Craig

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    • Posted

      Craig-

      You are so right, and thank you for the reminder. It is so hard to lay here day after day watching things pile up. I was feeling better today after this 2 week relapse and decide to try and do some things around the house. I'm back in bed with jello arms and legs. I think I need to prioritize and just try one thing for now. Yes I need to be smart and stress free smile Thanks again Craig! I'm praying for you today too!

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    • Posted

      It must be so frustrating Meredith, all you want to do is get up and do things and live normally when you start to feel better, and then to feel worse again for trying just feels so harsh and disheartening I know. Just really hoping you are feeling a bit better today, and remember things won't always be this way - the time will come again when your body resilience returns and you feel like you can do normal things and take more strain without having to worry about feeling bad afterwards, things will be so much easier then Meredith, like a new lease of life. But for now just hang in there and remember one day at a time is all you can do for now, and all any of us can do anytime! It's easy to say be smart and stress free but oh I know much more difficult to apply when you're feeling so unwell with this virus.

      Thank you so much for your prayers Meredith for me, it means a lot just now as I've messed a lot of things up myself latey and need help to get back on the right road with life.

      Take care and thinking of you

      Craig

       

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    • Posted

      I am so sorry you missed your trip to the beach. sad I am still struggling with appetite and sleep. Had a full blown anxiety attack and went to the ER this morning. Shortest ER visit ever. He told me to add Benadryl to my nightly routine and see if that helps me sleep. I spend all day laying in bed dreading nighttime for fear I won't get any sleep. It is starting to impact how much sleep my husband gets because I have been waking him up every morning at 5:30 crying because I haven't slept. Its been 10 days since I have had a decent nights sleep. 

      The last place I hiked was in KY. I live in AL. 

      I am still at a loss......

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  • Posted

    Hi Wendi,

    Really feeling how much you are suffering and hurting through your message, there are no words that can explain how you feel in those situations. You just want so badly something to change and for at least things to be settled. I really hope that you can get your test results soon and it can bring hope and reassurance. Remember with mono what you're going through is very common, this phase you're in right now in my experience was absolutely the worst, you won't have to go through anything like the first 3 months again Wendi, the intensity does lessen after that and even if it still takes a bit of time for full recovery, things become more bearable and manageable.

    Just want to reassure you that I'm still believing your going to get better. I really hope that your appetite can come back and your weight can settle, it is so frustrating when you keep going to doctors and they keep either not really taking a proper interest or listen to your concerns to just say there is nothing they can do. It's so unhelpful when they do that and I don't know if they realise how fragile and vulnerable and desperate people are with this virus but how they can make them feel with those words. Don't hesitate to go to the hospital or doctors again, I understand though how wearying it can be too and it is really draining when you don't feel like you're getting anywhere.

    There is still hope Wendi, just hang in there is the message and remember things won't always be there way - just riding out each day for now is an achievement, and let me reassure that with mono for sure your strength, health and body resilience does come back again given a bit of time - absolutely it does and that's from someone who thought it never would after months of going through it. I know you're not a believer but I'm trusting God will help us all through our struggles at the moment, everyone on the forum, goodness knows we really need the help!

    Thinking about you and remember you ARE going to get through this Wendi - rooting for you and do keep us updated on how things are going, just really hoping the intensity of things can lessen very soon you've been through such an awful time I know sad

    Craig

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    • Posted

      Thanks Craig <3 Your messages really help. I managed to eat several times yesterday and even tho i am still sleeping in chunks, last night I got more restful sleep. I think the most disheartening thing about all this is the days you start feeling better so you don't do much to reserve your energy and hope you are making improvements just to feel horrible the next day. The rollercoaster of emotions on this journey is hard.

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    • Posted

      Oh Wendi, I do know the feeling, have been experiencing it now for different reasons with my back and pain and how it's affected me mentally. Go to bed hoping that the next day can be a better one, sometimes wake up feeling better than others, but when the days just seem to go the same and you realise it's not much better than the day before it is so hard and discouraging.

      Let's not be discouraged Wendi, hard as it is, this is a storm but storms pass by, just need to hang on for now and trust that things will get better. I do believe that for you Wendi I really do. The rollercoaster of emotions is so hard. Thinking about you and believing you will get well again, if it takes a bit of time then don't panic that can be very normal, but just hoping there is a real improvement sooner than later as I can tell you are so weary and need a real boost.

      Craig

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    • Posted

      Thanks so much Wendi for your kind and supportive words, I am really grateful for those at this time really need them right now.

      That is good news that it's not C diff Wendi, although I know it doesn't help the mono situation at present do take it as a positive because mono does pass over, even though it's horrible and goes on longer than we hope often, it definitely does get better and you will get through this and make a full recovery - the virus is so debilitating and still thinking about you and rooting for you and believing you will get there with time.

      Craig

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