Tomorrow starts week 9 since the last 7.5

Thank you "Fudgey" Regards, David

Thank you Calmer! Kind words that inspire others. I wish you well my friend! David

Good ol' Calmer ...couldn't have said it better myself!

Focus on that tiny little light at the end of the tunnel David ...focus hard upon it ...you're getting closer!

Much peace to all ...

I have considered going back on the 7.5s. I am not going to, but I have wondered how it would feel. I have lost from 203 lbs to 183 lbs. That scares me. Weight loss is a cancer symptom. I have been to the hospital ER 2 times since I started this, and they claimed that I have the labs of a 25 year old. I have had 2 chest x-rays, a CT of the brain, and abdominal CT. All negative. Every new ache and pain scares me. My wife says that I am slowly getting better from her observation, but I feel like I am dying. I guess the anxiety is making my mind wander into the gutter. I just feel SO BAD. David

It's just the anxiety making every symptom worse,you have been checked out so you know there is nothing wrong,you will start to gain weight once the nausea goes away,are you taking some anti nausea medication? It does help you eat you must eat,little and often,if you don't eat it makes you feel so much worse I don't know why,but me and the other ladies found out by accident that eating does make you feel a little better,I know you will not want to eat but you have to force yourself,even if it's just a mouthful.When I spoke to cita they said going back on to mirt can make you feel worse and do you really want to have to go through all this again? Just keep thinking that and it will help push you forward.look back at how far you have come and you must be getting better if your wife is noticing.Try not to be hard on yourself I know it's so hard to believe that  withdrawl can last so long but it can I know it can I have lived it,try to relax and accept and it will help with your anxiety.treat the symptoms anti nausea tablets,cream for your aches,painkillers for the pain and eat that's the most important thing,don't worry about your weight,I put it on with mirt,lost in withdrawl and went back up to my normal weight.i hope some of what I ve said helps you.please take care 

Thank you and God Bless You! David

David the following are written up on my wall ..they're not to downplay any REAL and ACTUAL ailments I have ...but rather to help keep my mind in check as it can and does run amock when I'm feeling low and despondent. Just food for thought ..esp. to a mind torturing itself. Maybe ..just maybe reading them might help calm your thoughts a little too ..enough for you to separate the wheat from the chaff.

.."Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results"...

[Albert Einstein]

ALSO...

Hypochondriac

noun

1. A person who is abnormally anxious about their health. They may have a simple muscle ache yet their mind convinces them it is something far more sinister (e.g. terminal illness, cancer etc).

Much peace as always...to you David (wife) and everyone!

Karl

p.s. I too have had a dramatic weight loss since coming off Mirtazapine ...somewhere in the region of 14Ibs/16Ibs, nodoubt due to my poor appetite and lowered calorie intake.

Thank you Karl. I am at a point of needing guidance from time to time. I was originally told by medical personnel that it should be over in a month or less. I believed that they knew what they were talking about, so the fact that I am taking all this time must mean that it is something else. That is what I get for rational thought. Regards, David

I have yet to find a doctor, any doctor, who understands the severity of WDs from ADs, and, most especially, mirt. They are clueless, OR, worse, they don't BELIEVE you. We must advocate for ourselves. And, hopefully, help others along their journey. Doctors are very quick to hand out medicine, but not so quick in learning what it can do to you.

Hopefully, you are coming to the end of your suffering, David. I sure hope so. Always thinking of you. Hang on a little longer. You are closer to the end than you were a day ago!!

kathy,

i mentioned it to me family dr and he said the same thing .. that it was easy to come off ...

unbelievable

Thank you Kathy. You guys are keeping me going. Honestly, I could not have made it this far without you good folks. I hate to say it, but the medical community don't have a clue what mirt wd involves. suzie's doc says easy to come off mirt? I suppose the running of the bulls is a walk in the park! My bowels feel like they are raw inside from cramps, spasms, trapped gas, and constipation. It has hurt so bad that it has made me lay on my side, pull my knees up to my chest, and cry. And that is only ONE symptom, and I don't cry very often. It hurt so bad that one of my trips to the ER was because I thought that I was having a heart attack. Do I have anxiety? You bet your life, and panic attacks? How could you not have them! I'm sorry, but I have to let it go somewhere! Thank Ya'll For Listening! David

Excellent comments Kathy!

May I second your comment? Thank You Brother. David

god help us.  i don't have it nearly that bad, but i have mentioned that twice, about coming off mirtz, and he said the same thing.  gof give us strength!

Truth is David ...people do care about each other on here ...BUT knowing how helpless we really are to sometimes help ourselves nevermind someone else hundreds/thousands of miles away ...and not truly knowing what's going on ...we are left with a heavy heart as all we can do is make suggestions ...vast majority of which are useless or just not appropriate.

Now, with what you've described David either your mind/thoughts are conjuring up 'mirage' symptoms that to you are real OR your symptoms are as I believe them to be real actual events. Whether the former or the latter ..from the severity and longevity of just how long your terrible hellish pain has been been unrelenting YOU NEED TO BE IN HOSPITAL UNDER CLOSE CARE AND SUPERVISION. And yes it would be great if the makers of Mirtazapine funded the whole thing (if proven accountable).

Just how you get admitted in your City I have absolutely no idea. But I'd urge you ..or someone there who is able to help you to make some calls or get you to ER somehow.

What you describe is just far to graphic and heart rending to be ignored!

What makes this extra worse is the fact your dear wife must be under so much stress too.

A few days or a week in an appropriate clinical environment is what's needed now ...for you and your wife's sake.

I truly feel for your suffering.. Truly truly truly

Karl

i agree.. the problem is getting admitted

Karl, not conjured. That is why I was at the hospital one of the visits. But that was a couple of weeks ago, or maybe three. The pain is still there, but not like it was then. Like I have said before, I have IBS, and it is severe without the wd added in. Donna & I was discussing going in to the hospital for a couple of days this afternoon. My PCP doesn't admit his patients, he gave up his hospital priviledges years ago. So to get admitted, the ER doc has to diagnose a problem that the insurance will pay for, and then admit you under the care of one of the hospital's resident doctors. So, if he is not convinced that your mirt wd is valid, he sends you back home. How do you like them apples? David

I hear you David ...so it seems a case of money talks when it comes to getting one the care they need, and insurance is a roll of the dice!

I still maintain that you would benefit from being in a clinical environment ...but I truly am at a loss as to how that can be achieved.

I and I know a number of us on here are really concerned for you ..

Can anyone offer any thoughts?

QUESTION: David have you or anyone advocating on your behalf (your dear wife or a friend or familly member maybe) either asked or insisted upon you being admitted for a few days? ...if so, what precisely were you told?

Also...

PLEASE remind me and everyone (so there's absolutely no misunderstanding) ...by listing from 1 - 5 in order of severity/pain and importance...EXACTLY what troubles you right now the most and what if solved/alleviated would see your health either totally or vastly improved and happy.

1.?

2.?

3.?

4.?

5.?

My only other thought is around the area of PAIN MANAGEMENT ...have you considered acupuncture, hypnosis or morphine/burprenorphine patches etc etc to help alleviate pain and allow peaceful sleep?

Best regards

Karl

Hi David,

i hope you're feeling better. Mirt WD was the worst mental and physical pain of my whole life and im almost 60. Trying to get narcotic pain meds in US is like pulling teeth but I think it's something that would help anyone with mirt WD. Taken seriously and only when needed basis. I was finally admitted to the hospital after going in on a Thursday, with etrememe pain and then released. I was back the next day on a Friday. They weren't sure if it was kidney stones or pancreatic problems. So they did admit me. While I was there i have an IV the whole time and I think the hydration helped so much. I also has pain meds. I felt validated although I never brought up the mirt. Once you say you've been on an anti depressant, then people assume you have emotional issues. Also not one of the many doctors thought mirt would cause WD. It even seemed to make them angry the subject was mentioned so I have no idea! Even the makers of the AD say in their imformation not to stop taking this medication without doctors advice , which to me says it can cause problems. I've read it on all the AD's now so time to pull out the highlighter and shove the the papers somewhere on the treating doctors. BTW paxil has its own site and the people there are going nuts to get off. Some going back on and might be on for life. The reason they have such a big paxil site is because it is prescribed more often. Lots of people going through that site each day. So keep in mind you will get over this and each day the WD is less and less. There is an end. Go to the hospital if you think you need to go, sometimes the stress of the mirt WD can trigger other physical problems. So don't be shy about going to the ER. I did and they took me seriously both times, but I wouldn't mention mirt. Mention IBS and weight loss and the inability to eat. Make a mental list of physical problems before going. I think it's fair to say your  physical problems has caused great stress ( naturally ) . Mirt can kick you so low you can develop a physical problem. I did. It's called hyperparathyroidism. I've had surgery now and I'm better. I know it was triggered by the mirt. So if something comes up physically don't think it's just mirt....it may be something else. If your GP has no hospital rights might find another one or just go ER. It's gone on a long time if you don't see it waning then time to start complaining more loudly. And yes it could be something else. But mirt is the trigger. So get help. Keep going till you get the help you need and deserve, you didn't sign up for this kind of serious physical BS. Keep complaining and keep moving to the next guy/gal until you get results. Best wishes, I know it's hard to advocate for yourself when you are in such bad shape.When it's all over we can all try and prove it was the mirt but for now...don't mention it to the doctors in the ER. That's my take on it and hope it helps. All the best!!!!

Great advice Rose! I haven't thought about not telling them. It is almost like if you mention mirt wd all serious care stops. This is an excellent post and will benefit anyone who reads it. My main issues now are nausea, abdominal pain, fatigue, and headaches. They did do a brain CT to rule out a stroke. Thank you so much for taking the time to write this. I feel a little more positive from just reading it. Take Care, David

Excellent thoughts and advice for David and everyone in a similar position Rose!

Karl, here they are:

1. Abdominal pain, cramps

2. Fatigue

3. Nausea

4. No Appetite

5. Body Aches

6. General sick feeling

7. Anxiety

8. Depression due to the other things.

9. Lack of restful sleep

10. Feeling really weak

These come and go, as does the severity. I thank you for your concern, as I know that you wouldn't be on this site if you didn't already have your own cross to bear. David

Every one of them can and do occur with WD from mirt. David. Try not to worry more. You will only make it worse for yourself. You've made it this far, the end really is in sight and it probably won't happen all at once.

Best wishes.

Thank you Kathy. Each of you are the stepping stones of encouragement on a walkway to the end of this awful mess. And, I appreciate it more than you could possibly know. When my wife asked how I felt this morning before leaving for work, I just said "sick". That pretty much sums it up. David

david,

i am thinkingg of trying to get myself amitted to hospital andi don't have nearly as much going on as you.  i just know i need help and i can't take it anymore.  may god give us strength

Suzie, I hope you are able to get in, I completely understand about not being able to take it anymore. Feedback from others and knowing what to expect, found on this website, has been the only thing that have kept me going, and it has been really, really hard. Like I have said before, I have been to the hospital twice, but they sent me home. Someone mentioned that you should only tell them your symptoms and not mention the mirt wd. You do or say whatever you need to that will get you admitted. Good Luck and God be with and bless you.

well i would be going to the psychiatric hospital .. which is really the only symptoms that i have,  it's just that i have bee doing this for so long. .. try this try that, i feel i need monitoring but i wouldhave to say i'm on the edge ...

Suzie, sweetheart, whatever it takes to get you help.

David thanks for that...

I have done 2 things ...First I have considered my own personal experiences ..Second I have researched a number of online sources (inc. the array of member comments on here.

And I can say...

1.I am 99% convinced that ALL symptoms you've listed can and are often associated with withdrawal from Remeron/Mirtazapine (either directly or having been triggered by).

2. I have personally suffered with EACH AND EVERY ONE of the symptoms listed. The only thing that differs is the order of severity and longevity. I also am a hypochondriac and exhibit OCD behaviour.

Clearly you are having a worse time of it ..and we who have felt pain tremble when we read your updates.

I am letting you know this in the simple hope of helping to allay some of your fears and anxiety. Its so hard to remain positive when thoughts are running amok and only doom n gloom can be seen ahead. E.g. Am I dying? Do I have cancer? Is this ever going to end? etc etc etc etc. MANY of us have been there, done that and got the T-shirt to prove it!

Last week I felt like dying (and I mean that) ...the pain seemed endless. If I felt a pain in my chest or in my lower abdomen or in my head I thought the worst. I even began revising my Will. I didn't eat a crumb for 4days. And so much more! Today, although I've not slept much, and don't feel great and am dealing with tragic family/domestic issues ..I have managed to do 20mins of meditation, drink a litre or so of water, eat a banana and sit in the sunshine doing some deep breathing. And I don't feel like dying today!

I think its good that ER/Hospital have checked you out and eliminated anything you were fearing.

Just keep doing tiny baby steps ..do anything positive today and this week etc even if you dont reap the rewards strainghtaway ...itll all count in the days to come and help bring the day of better health closer.

Look up and read for inspiration:

Serenity Prayer

Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971)

Wishing you peace

Karl

Very well written, and the truth. thank you Karl.

Good move Suzie ...only you know your pain ..but feeling for you I do hope you can get the help you need (and asap). When in a place of pain, hurt and dispondency etc to be in a place where one can be observed, correctly treated and supported, such as a clinical environment will im sure bring comfort and swifter healing.

Wishing you much peace and strength!

I just read this again. I save the ones that really give me the uplifting help that I need. Thanks Again, David