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Too ill for a wedding

Posted , 7 users are following.

Yvonne72736
Yvonne72736

Hello everyone, in just over 2 weeks time my daughter is getting married and presently I'm having a big relapse and feeling really poorly. That would pose a problem even if she was getting married nearby but I probably would be able to try my very best to be there even if it was only for the ceremony, however she's getting married 4 hours drive away. I have damaged nerves causing neuropathy in my pelvis and travelling is very difficult and painful. Like most of us on this forum, I'm in pain all the time and coupling that with all the horrible symptoms of M.E. I really don't think I can be there. At first I thought maybe if I travelled up a couple of days before the wedding thereby giving myself time to rest and maybe recover enough, so I booked the room. But since then I've relapsed really badly, with cluster migraines, trimengial pain, IBS and those strange symptoms I call 'brain zaps' where it feels like something does a shock inside my head for a second,but over and over. I'm really feeling that even if I could manage to withstand the journey, I then have the wedding excitement and all the talking and walking about and socialising and I just think it will all be too much for me I feel too poorly. The trouble is, even though my family are sympathetic and do try their best to understand, I feel like I'm having to prove that I'm too ill. I feel really heartbroken, guilty, and sad not to be able to just function even in special circumstances like these! This illness really is the pits!

Has anyone else had to miss such an important celebration? I'd really appreciate to know....I feel like I'm committing a heinous crime. Please help if you can, any pointers would be a comfort.

1 like, 16 replies

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  • Yvonne72736
    Yvonne72736

    Posted

    Hi lynn, oh I know what you mean about the gardening. One year I bought some lovely plants, pansies and geraniums and then got too ill like you and they stayed in their pots on the garden table.  At least your little dog has the garden to run around in, and will be company for you, we have two cats and wouldn't be without them. 

    ​I know... my son is lovely too, but somehow sons are so wrapped up in forging their way in the world Mum gets pushed down the list.  I've been really lucky I have two daughters one lives nearby and the other who is the bride lives four hours in the opposite direction to the wedding venue, so consequently I've not been able to visit her home. 

    ​I was not sleeping with worrying about the wedding trip and speaking with other sufferers on this forum has been such a help!  You're right guilt makes everything worse, so now that she has accepted that I won't be there in person but will be with the grace of Skype (fingers crossed) I feel a lot relieved.

    ​Once again thank you Lynne, take care and hope your weekend goes ok.

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