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Too scared to kill myself, how pathetic

Posted , 129 users are following.

Dannie1989
Dannie1989

That's it. I've had about all I can take from this miserable thing we call life. I'm sick of being depressed and having panic attacks.

I want to hang myself, don't ask me why that's my chosen method but it is but I have a death phobia so I'm too scared to do it and gave myself a panic attack instead.

That's irony in its finest form.

It's just not worth it anymore, nothing is.

My life's falling apart and I have absolutely zero will left to carry on this fight.

I'm done.

15 likes, 182 replies

182 Replies

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  • kay3152
    kay3152 Dannie1989

    Posted

    Hi Dannie. I know this is a little late but I wanted to tell you that I understand. People that try and tell you to cheer up, youre too pretty to be sad, and go seek therapy just dont get it. It is not that simple. not to mention the fact that being "pretty" has nothing to do with serious mental illness. I honestly think this is not an educated invironment for someone who is seirous about how they feel, like yourself. I understand because I have, and currently feel the same way. I suffer from sever major depression disorder and its certainly no way to live on a daily basis. It is not about a choice, its not about just talking to someone and feeling better, it is not about circumstance. this is our lives DAILY. to the second. There IS NO FEELING BETTER for some of us. What I will say, is that if you have never saught treatment, you should. a vast majority of people who suffer from our disorders are completely treatable with THE RIGHT medication. you will never truly know if you have a treatment resistant disorder without actually consulting a professional. after that point, there are very compassionate places in Sweden and Belguim that understand a lifetime of untreatable dispair and stress is unbearable.

    Please consider all of your options before making a decision, and whichever decision you choose, I understand.

    • daena15942
      daena15942 kay3152

      Posted

      i don't understand what you are going through right now but i wish all the best and goodness for you. i don't know if anything i say will be helpful, but just know that you're in my thoughts and that i see you and i care. i hope you're still here.

  • bellalondon
    bellalondon Dannie1989

    Posted

    Please tell me you’re okay? I know what you mean I’m screaming for help but I know I’m too weak as p**s to do anything so I’ll just seek attention instead. Just let me know you’re okay xxx
    • daena15942
      daena15942 bellalondon

      Posted

      you're not weak. and none of it is your fault. i hope you're staying strong, no matter how hard it is. i hope that people will listen and see you and help. i see you and i care. i hope for your healing and happiness. keep on going.

  • bellalondon
    bellalondon Dannie1989

    Posted

    If no one else makes you feel

    Like you care. I do. So much xxx 

    • bellalondon
      bellalondon

      Posted

      *they.  Sorrry. Very emotional x
  • james62646
    james62646 Dannie1989

    Posted

    It's the same for me

    • wayne1962
      wayne1962 james62646

      Posted

      Hi James - are you receiving medical help for how you feel?
    • daena15942
      daena15942 james62646

      Posted

      i hope you're still here James. there's still happiness for you to experience out there, even if it doesn't seem so right now. i'm not sure if any of this is helpful, but just know you're not alone and that i support you.

  • kevin09517
    kevin09517 Dannie1989

    Posted

    I know yours is an old post and I don’t know if you will read the comments again or if you are even alive;  I feel exactly the same way now.  I am very very depressed and feel super bad about myself but I am to much of a whimp to actually complete an attempt. I don’t have a gun and don’t have the social skills or gumption to get one.  That is my tool of choice for suicide.  But Dannie,  perhaps somehow we are being protected from ourselves, somehow we are lucky, somehow we are not supposed to die of suicide, at least not right now.  I am starting to feel a little better now or I wouldn’t have responded to this post.  I hope you are still alive.

    • steve1176
      steve1176 kevin09517

      Posted

      Hi, I'm happy you feel better. The fact i dont have the guts to end it doesnt make me feel any better but till now it has kept me alive, you are right. I have been trying to be healthy again for years but now ive lost all hope of making it. Ive resigned myself to feeling bad all the time, sometimes bad, sometimes worse. Whenever i try to get help, i realise that those who care enough to try, need me to be well, and those who don't but say they do, take the p**s of me. Medical help is not an option as I don't want pills, and psychologists bleed you dry, which in turn will increase my problems. I decided I will try to help others so as to find purpose again but ive been postponing it for very long now.

    • kevin09517
      kevin09517 steve1176

      Posted

      I have resigned myself to feeling bad all the time too, but surprisingly, sometimes I don’t feel so terribly bad.  Today I am kind of glad I didn’t have a gun when I wrote my comment on this page a while back.  Know that you are helping others, because reading your comment has helped me reflect as well.  Perhaps I can help others as too.  What could possibly be a truer altruism than to be in such a miserable state and still want to help others.  You have taught me a good lesson.  Thank you.
    • daena15942
      daena15942 kevin09517

      Posted

      both of you are really good souls and i'm sorry that you have to go through this pain. i hope you're both still here. i'm rooting for both of you. there's still happiness waiting for you guys and i hope you both experience it. best wishes.

    • kevin09517
      kevin09517 daena15942

      Posted

      i am still here. i have not thought about these posts in a long time until i got a notification to night. thank you very much for seeing my soul...

      you are a kind soul as well. i am doing much better. this life has so much meaning for all of us. sometimes it is very hard to see, but it is there and it is astounding!

    • daena15942
      daena15942 kevin09517

      Posted

      i'm really glad to hear that! i hope that you've experienced a lot of goodness and i continue to hope for more goodness for you. have a wonderful day 😃

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