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Omg did i have the night from hell i was in terrible pain all over and only managed 1and half hours sleep because of the pain and the other day i lost my balance and hit my toes againts my steps and have maged to break two of them so more pain as well so not good and on top of that i accused my very carring hubby of having an affair i think im getting too parnoid its because the last 6 months i have lost intrestin all sexual things can anyone tell me if this hashaoened to them and how can i get some of that back i know my hubby says it doesnt bother hime but hes always making sexual jokes like if i say things like can you put this in so i think hes frustratedand i dont blame him so how can i get that back as i love hubby so much yet scared i might drive him away so having a very low day and still in terribe pain thanks for listening x

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  • Posted

    Hi Cheryl,

    I  have also managed to injury myself  almost two weeks  ago  now,  I slipped  when  getting  off my sofa and the arm went straight  into  my ribs then dislocated  my shoulder which  reignited  all my pains. The sexual issue from the reverse direction is always  going  happen  as all of us are in  pain know all to we'll.  When you  get  low and in a lot of pain  your  mind starts to  go mad and think up all these things  so chin up  and for all of us lots hope that we can find  a way to  control  our pain a bit better at the very least 

    • Posted

      Hi there

      Och you poor thing i bet that hurt hope your healing now yesi agree i just hope i can get my pain under controland thanks hun i feel so bad of accusing him as he really is a wonderful carring husband and does alot for me and im always thanking him and telling him that i really appreicate all that he does for me, we have been married 20 years now so hes put up alot with me but i still feel young at 51 i used to be so active as i was a dance teacher now i feel life has wized by me but many thanks

      love and peace

      Cherl

  • Posted

    Hi cheryel a good thing is a warm room good painkillers , use some almond oil with ylang ylang in it makes you relaxed and enhance the mood, sometimes with health anxieties we have to plan a bit as hard as it is in pain , nice bath oils candles really helps to relax, hard if you have little children and a hectic busy life , but we need to try and also be supportive to each other , very hard for you in pain, sympathys with you, also remember sex helps with pain release endorphins , you will feel so much better after x
    • Posted

      Hi there hun Thanks for your help firstly although i do have a bath i have to use bath lift and its not comftable so wont relax if its warm in room i get too hot and that aggreivates me but i do light lovely scented candles and soft music i cant use any oils as my skin recats badly to them god sound like a moaner now and my children all grown up as im 51 when i used to have sex it made thepain really bad as i also have bad arthritis in my knees lower back and shoulders so its really bad but will try and see if theres any oils i can use thanks ever so much take care 

      love and peace always

      cherl xx

    • Posted

      Ahh you take care any time want a hat offload you do so , sympathy with you so awful for you , I am 52 in lads pain today in shoulder blades breast neck head , horrible day drizzl dull . You sound far worse than myself sending lots angels👼👼🌟🌟take care Cheryl xx
    • Posted

      Hi Cheryl hope you don't mind me asking have you got fibromyalgia ? As I am on this forum as I have costochronditis and get email back on chat but not sure if it is the same condition we have , saying that I havnt been diagnosed still waiting on further tests as could be fibromyalgia as I ache like flu but I am mobile , I do allot of Pilates yoga still and walking . Must be so frustrating for you after being a dance teacher . Hugs to you 👯👯
    • Posted

      Hi there Hun

      I know the feeling well and thanks hun i wouldnt say im worse than you its this horrible thing we have with our other problems and makes us feel bad i hope you feel a bit better soon sending all my love to you and thanks for being there really appreicated 

      love and peace always

      Cherl

      xxxxx

    • Posted

      Thanks keep your chin up as my my mum used to say ,  funny time year this too I love spring summer 🌞🌞☀️🌼🌼🌹🌺 
    • Posted

      Hi there Yes i have been diagnosed with Fibro as we say and i also have a blood disorder called myelodysplasia proably spelt it wrong its where my blood cells dont work proerly in my bone marrow which means have to have blood transfusions when ever they get to low and i have heart disease and copd and chronic arthritis as well so its alot to deal with But fibro can affect people in different ways some of us can still get syptoms and still be very active and with others it can cause them to be bed ridden and that i hope you get a firm diangnose soon so you know what your dealing with it took them ten years to dignose me so good luck hun and now matter what you got happy to chat any time

      peace and love

      Cherl x

    • Posted

      Poor you'll those problems and copd and arthritis , you very brave lady must be so hard for you , my thoughts with you , what some people have to put up with daily is very sad , pain is awful and very dibilitating for you.

      thoughts with you and take care xxxxx

    • Posted

      Hi hun

      Thanks for your kind thoughts yes it is hard but life goes on and theres people alot worse than me and i wish them all the best and wishing you all the best yet again thanks

      love always

      Cherl

      xxx

  • Posted

    my husband and i slept seperate for 4yrs because the pain and the lack of understanding from my husband just made it impossiable to sleep together sex went as well .

    at least it sounds like your husband is understanding. 

    we are back on track now but its still hard 

    spend more time together laughing , increase magneisum and that will help with your sex drive well it did mine. if you cant take internaly buy some in the form of oil and apply topicaly , night and morning[does sting a bit ] this will also help with pain . magneisum flakes also added to a bath will ease stiffness and pain. 

    i also take q10 b12 vitdk2 and colidual gold . which all pay there part . 

    i am not pain freebut it helps as does massage why not see if he will give you a gentle massage before sex  .then have a warm bath after . thats what i do .

    hope this helps a little .biggrin

    • Posted

      Hiya Hun

      Glad your back on track now and thanks for the advice will give it a go

      lots of luck

      Cherl x

    • Posted

      Tiswass .. This sound interesting magnesium flakes were do you purchase them from, does magnesium help fibromyalgia ? I am not as bad as cheryel as still mobile and still walk keep fit but feel general malaise ache like I have flu, still undergoing tests , I am healthy don't drink smoke , only vice I am a worrier but getting CBT for that , I love excercise but don't go over the top, any alternative for aches pains be good . Xx
  • Posted

    Hi Cherl. I'm just 30 myself and like yourself a bit paraniod about my husband. Hes 26 very good looking popular with the ladies! We've only been together 3 years to begin with I was skinny, long haired full of energy. Now Im in constant pain, hairs fallen out and plus 4 st! I manage to keep him sexually happy by quality over quantity haha. I have to really push myself to start but get into things. We stop for breaks etc when my legs cramp and hes fine with it. Hope that helps x
    • Posted

      Hi there Dee

      like you my hair is fallen out almost too scared to brush it , my hubby is a ladies man also but thats just him unlike you i used to be a big girl size 20 in clothes now for some reason the weight is fallen off me rather fastim now in clothes size 14 and thats just been in last two moths yet i eat 3 meals a day but i mainly eat fish and salad apart from two days where one is my sunday roast and the other is a junk food day but i dont eat anything after 6pm as i will feel bloated but because of the loose skin and pain and arthritis and no sex drive at all doesnt help, buti will take note of everyones suggestions and try them wishing you all the best speaksoon

      Love and peace

      Cherl

    • Posted

      have you had your thyroid checked i dont like the sound of such weight loss although like you said you do eat right but along with the weight loss you say you are loosing your hair , if you havnt allready i would get the thyrod tested . it might be perfectly fine but you have to be realistic it could be graves diesease and if it is it needs to be treated . sorry dont want to scare you , but best be safe , fingers crossed. its ok . maybe you just need supplements . and hot oil treatments for your hair .

      magneisum improves your sexdrive lolcoolbiggrin

       

    • Posted

      isent it awful , its almost like sex by numbers isent it. haha you gotta to laugh .have you tried the supplements for hair loss on the market. theres loads on net. i keep checking mine because i get worried about my hair sometimes i seem to be losing a lot then it seems ok . nothing to worry about yet. i just by my self a couple of light weight wigs if it does ,. its more over sensistive bladder i get upset about. 

      did you know that some jewish women have all there hair shaved of when they marry and have to wear wigs all there lives . find that i bit confussing . . lol

    • Posted

      HI there

      i wouldnt shave my hair off for no man mind you i have a bold spot on my head so mayby i should look at nice wigs lol i have a sentive bladder so embrassing but hey ho its our live take care to both of you xxxxx

    • Posted

      Hi there yes throid is a little low but they said nothing to worry about the doctors are worried about the drastic weight loss and thanks for adivewill look into in rolleyes
    • Posted

      they shave there heads due to reigious beliefs , i am not sure which do it orthdox or the others , glad i am not on my own with the sensistive bladder i get very upset about it sometimes . i dont know if i mentioned the retraining programme i am going to start soon , can lead to a full recovery i v just got to get a recliner for my spare room and i can get started . i am hoping with all my heart it works . like everyone with this blooming condition i am sick of being sick .keep your fingers crossed for me, maybe not they proberly stay that way .keep well .
    • Posted

      As a 43 year old male  in this conversation I struggle  to  find  the right words so knock me if I say anything out of line. 

      I have put my wife off in this area but when we do manage slowly  is the key but we do end up with a  bit of  a high speed finish. ....but I do have to say by the time we have finished I am absolutely  finished. 

      I sometimes end up feeling like I can't catch my next breath and this is with me taking the easiest option of lying on my back.(I used to  be  on top)

      What I have to  say is that I liked to an hour  or  two  with bedroom activities and since the onset of fibro I now manage twenty minutes every 3 months instead of every week  at the very least and that is  down to me having so much pain and my wife not wanting to hurt me. 

      I hope  that  this  has come  over the right  way...😕 

    • Posted

      Hi there

      yes hun that has comeover the right way and thankyou for you kind message last time we made love like you i needed the finish to be done quick and i was in that much pain that my gp had to come out and give me injection so maby this is playing on my mined and put me off so i needto try when im not too bad my problem is finding that right momnet as im having problems keeping pain under control.

      With love and peace always

      Cherl 

    • Posted

      Hiya hun

      I hope it does work for you and it makes you feel better my problem is that althought ive been diagnosed with fibro they are also checking meout for Ms as my syptoms seem like alot of Ms so ill keep you posted hope all goes well

      love and peace

      Cherl

    • Posted

      I've  had a brain  scan to rule out  MS  but it came back negative. 

      I sometimes  wonder  if  it would  be  better  that way as the Dr's here don't have enough  experience  with  fibro  to  help  me  the way I need  it

    • Posted

      il keep my fingers crossed it is not . hun ,

      hope you have a nice day.

    • Posted

      Hi hun my brain scan came back normal too but my bloods and that indcate that something is going on and they arealso on about doing a lumber puntureas they say that although the brain scan is normal you could still have ms, i did have a really bad docwho kept saying it was all in my mine so i changed doctors now i have a very carring doc who is very good and understanding well wishing you all best

      Cherl x

    • Posted

      cherl sorry just had a thought hun , [dosent happen often] hahah

      i know theres help through the medical proffession to get help in this area i know its a bit emabarrising but maybe u could ask your gp about it

      i know when people have cancer they get advice on how to keep your relationship going.sorry its a bit vague , worth a try ,lolcheesygrin

    • Posted

      iv known a lady with MS who used to be a model and it is a horriable condition , she devolped it when she was 25 her husband left her and went of with a younger women , she was ill for ten years struggling with two kids

      then it went into remission , till she was 45 and came back really bad.

      but i do get what you mean iv said simulair things which is wrong i know but you just get so frusrted with this condition, doctors often think your swinging the lead and other people think your winging on about a few aches and pains .

      i wish everyone who thought that  could have fibro for 6 months and see just how much it impats on there lives . but tell someone you have cancer you get all the understanding and support in the world and know one calls you a winger.madfrown keep loving and giving your best thats all you can do . i am sure your wife understands .i went 4 yrs with out sex sleeping in seperte rooms i know how hard it is when you still have a sex drive but everything hurts so bad u just cant be bothered sad. but we are back on track now wink but  like you and yours its not often and sometimes i just want it over . the slightest wrong move and i could be in pain for weeks .kinda puts you off. sad wish you well hope things improve for you smile

    • Posted

      I might  have given  the  wrong attitude  then I  mean at least  all Dr's  know what MS is but with  fibro  it's  not  the  case 
    • Posted

      i really would try to avoid a lumber punture hun us less its totaly unavoidable , heard such bad things about them .you dont want to end up in even more pain .eek
    • Posted

      i have had two lumber puntures in the past so know what to expect but it might not come to that yet
    • Posted

      My wife had breast cancer in 2010 and we were given advice on how to continue our sexual relationship, make sure it's slow and always use some kind of lube there is quite a few on the market these days

       

    • Posted

      i know hun we do and we use shall we say devices to help which they do and we have brought some feathers to use for arsoul  which is very nice .

                         razz 

    • Posted

      Hi there

      thanks for that will do

      Cherl hope you wife is as well as she can be i know its hard as my late mother died of ovrian cancer so wish ing both all the best xxxx

    • Posted

      oh god rather you than me hun .epidurals ihad were bad enough .

      hope it dosent come to another hun .eek

    • Posted

      My wife is doing good and is back at work loving her job most day's.

      The Consultant told her last month that he doesn't need to see her again which is a big milestone and she is now on the committee for raising funds for a ne cancer centre on the Isle of Man which was sort of forgotten about when our Government built our nice new hospital.

    • Posted

      i know hun i greed with your point iv wished sometimes i had cancer at least you either die or get better , with fibro its like your hanging around in limbo , but neither of us would really want to suffer cancer or MS . 

      please dont be ofended i was agreeing with you .confused

    • Posted

      not offended at all I've thought sometimes I would be better having MS then the Dr's at least know what you need to help you get through the day, down side of that i suppose is that it does get worse. I'm not sure with fibro if this is it, what I am like now is what I will be like in twenty years..... but still I am able to get up each day which is a bonus I guess
    • Posted

      iv been reading alot on preventing illness and alot of people say that keeping your body on a 80% alkaline and 20 acidic diet helps keeps you healthy and reduces pain .might be worth looking into 

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