Posted , 7 users are following.
I'm 65 and my wife has stop desiring sex for about 15yrs . I'd rather have sex with her but what can you really do. I've been masturbating since I was about 10yrs. old and it hasn't killed me yet in fact my doctor says it's good for me. I do have an enlarge prostate but that just comes with age 😦
0 likes, 32 replies
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mary_24931 very05565
Posted
Have you tried talking to her? She must have her reasons for not wanting sex. She needs to feel loved, not just someone who is wanted only for sex. Obviously I am speaking as a woman and we feel differently about these things, but it's not uncommon for the sex drive to lessen as people get older, women particularly. Buy her some flowers and chocolates and spend a nice evening with her, cuddling, but not expecting sex and maybe gently approach the subject without her feeling pressured. Forgive me for asking, but do you tell her that you love her?
very05565 mary_24931
Posted
I 've been told that women give sex for romance and that man give romance for sex. I've given her flowers, take her out to eat, cuddle up to her while we're watching TV, and even give her a massage when we go to bed and all that does is put her to sleep. you just don't know what I've been putting up with I even go to a psychiatrist for this and other stressful problems.so I just go on accepting things the way they are and yes I do love my wife and desire sex from no one else but her that's why it hurts so bad.
mary_24931 very05565
Posted
Very sorry for you. It must be very difficult. It's a shame that she won't address the problem though it seems as if she doesn't see it as a problem, which is sad. You do sound as if you have respected her and tried to be respectful.
very05565 mary_24931
Posted
Yes!Yes!Yes! After doing research on my own I figured out that my wife has reached early menopause but refuses to get any treatment do to heath risk.
very05565 mary_24931
Posted
Thank you for your understanding and your right. And I do love very much and told her there is no other women for me but her. More to my story just don't want to write book in my comments.
Guest very05565
Posted
I think if they lived you they already understand and would let you went out to them.
Jeanie2222 very05565
Posted
My situation is the opposite. I want to be with my husband but he prefers to masturbate. He is 65 and I am 64. This has been going on for 15 years as well. But..it's worse than that. He prefers to masturbate to 20 something year olds while watching porn, and my heart is broken. I am still good looking for my age but my husband has no interest in me whatsoever. We have been married for 40 yrs and this is truly devastating for me. I've tried talking to him to no avail; he thinks he is doing nothing wrong..even though he knows that I have no sex life at all. I guess he just doesn't care.
SteV3 very05565
Posted
Hi very05565,
I am in a similar predicament, the trouble is I have no idea of how to fix it.
We've been married for 29 years, and we enjoyed regular sex. However, now I cannot remember the last time we had sex, it's been that long.
My wife masturbates, and even tells me - but she will not let me lie on her bed at anytime, we have separate beds now. Doctor's have mentioned she should be on a diet, okay she maybe obese but that did not stop us before. Lately, it has become worse - if I wake up before her she turns around as though she is afraid to show her own body to me!
If I mention the word sex, she just says you would never cope. Okay I do have bad mobility, but that does not stop me moving around on a bed. Yes, I masturbate - but if I tell her, she always yes in your dreams.
That last sentence may seem strange to some people, but some men do masturbate while asleep, Google it and you'll find it is common in men. At first I thought she was having me on, until she took a photo of me!
Yes, I look at porn, but that does not do anything for me... It's not the same as sex with the person you have loved for many years. I'm 56 this year, and my wife will be 50... it must be at least 7 years now since we had sex. I have tried everything I can think of but I get nowhere.
There you go, masturbation does not even come close to real sex, but what else can you do?
Jeanie2222 SteV3
Posted
Many women are humiliated when they discover that their husbands are watching porn..because many women feel as though they cannot compete with porn stars in the body department. And, if a woman is overweight..well she can completely lose her self esteem..if her husband is watching porn. No woman wants to feel as though they have to compete with other women..and porn stars are definitely other women to compete with. Wives will give up sex with their husbands and hide their bodies if they feel they are competing with porn stars.
Guest Jeanie2222
Posted
Can i say that porn is porn and sex in real life is sex in real life?
very05565 SteV3
Posted
Thank for your comment and your honesty. If more men would talk about this there might less stress on them.
very05565 Guest
Posted
Yes.
Jeanie2222 Guest
Posted
I'm not sure what you mean by that because there are men who give up sex in real life because of porn. There are men who no longer have sex with their wives because they like porn better. And, there are wives who feel completely humiliated by their husbands..when their husbands prefer masturbating to porn stars over having sex with their wives. That is a competition that no woman wants to be compete in.
Jeanie2222 very05565
Posted
Men may view porn with a grain of salt..like it's no big deal, and means nothing. But, many women view porn as a threat and a competition, and most men don't seem to understand that. Even virtual women are viewed as a threat to a woman's self esteem. And, how many older women feel as though they are physically able to compete with young porn stars?? Porn can be DEEPLY wounding to a woman's heart, and her self worth.
very05565
Posted
Here's a little for thought for you guys. If married man put aside a marble every time he had sex with his wife the first year of marriage and then took one out after the first year he would have marbles left over when he dies. My problem is I ran out of marbles the second year : (
Jeanie2222 very05565
Posted
My husband of 40 yrs would have used up all of his marbles weekly for the past 40 years..if he had interest in me. I was always willing.
Jeanie2222
Posted
I think I said that wrong. To be more blunt..I would have had sex with my husband whenever he wanted these past 40 years. And, we did until about 15 years ago..when he discovered that he likes porn better than me. Not every woman is like you are describing.