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Walking zombie

Posted , 7 users are following.

jason1602
jason1602

Had depression for 4 years. My GP is no help at all, have given up trying to get help now. I'm self employed and just about drag myself out of bed each morning. I have no money worries but just incredibly lonely. Have been on various dating sites and tried to make friends by joining clubs but I have no interest in anything. Would rather sit and stare at the 4 walls wasting my life away. Can't wait for the day I'm no longer here. They say time is a healer. . . What a load of rubbish. . It just gets worse

2 likes, 21 replies

21 Replies

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  • jason1602
    jason1602

    Posted

    After a weekend of thinking about everything and nothing I realise that I will not be going to get any help from my doctor as I am where I want to be. I have no feelings or emotions towards anything or anybody. I can't remember the last time I felt happy or sad, laughed or smiled. Nothing at all. I will go to work and then just shut myself away in the evening's and weekends not troubling anyone. This seems to be the best thing for me.

    Thanks for all the replys

  • robin35600
    robin35600 jason1602

    Posted

    I'm sorry you are going through this. You sound so much like my son, except he has a few people who try to reach out to him and he still feels so alone. He is also severly depressed and takes (after a lot convincing from me) anti depressants. But I see it doesn't help as much as I'd hope. Please stay strong. I know feeling alone is awful. I do from time to time feel that way. I have no friends outside of work. I have two grown children that no longer live with me and one 4 year old. But life can be hard. We need to just figure out a reason to enjoy it. Dating sites aren't that easy now a days but you can try again, or try friendship sites. There are a few out there I had tried. I made one friend who helped me get past sadness even tho she was an online friend, I still feel she was a great person to chat with. I hope every passing day gets better for you. 
    • jason1602
      jason1602 robin35600

      Posted

      Thanks for your reply robin, your son and I sound alike. I have just got to the point where I realise it's not worth trying anymore. Have been on dating sites etc for 4 yrs and have not met one single person. I just can't see the point in trying anymore and have to accept that this is what my life has become and there is nothing to look forward to. I will be one of those people who you hear about on the news, where I have died in my home and the body wasn't discovered until the neighbours complained of the smell of my decomposing body. But on the bright side I won't have to worry about none of that
    • robin35600
      robin35600 jason1602

      Posted

      Have you tried groups? There are websites like friend finders. And some of those people eventually meet up to do things like hiking or movies. But just on a friend basis. Like there are groups out there for different hobbies. It's worth a try. Just to even have someone to chat with.
    • jason1602
      jason1602 robin35600

      Posted

      There's not much I haven't tried over the years . . I have just got to accept that sometimes things are to broken to be fixed and accept that this is how I will have to live out the rest of this existence. The quicker it ends the better
    • robin35600
      robin35600 jason1602

      Posted

      I'm sorry nothing has worked. I guess it can be hard, but sometimes I think with all this technology we have out there like the internet that making friends is easier than it used to be. I wish there was a magic wand that could fix everyones problem because I would do it. It is sad hearing stories about people such as yourself, my son and two friends I've crossed paths with in life feel that the answer is giving up. I'm not much help without super powers. I try. I try to be there for anyone, but in the end I know its not enough. I've tried so hard with my son. He fell into drugs because I guess he couldn't face life. He is getting better day by day but still feels hopeless. I won't give up fighting for him to get better. I can offer you an ear to listen to. I don't have many friends at all. And I'm not judgemental or anything. So the offer is out there if you need anyone to chat with I'll listen. 
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