What else am i supposed to do to get help?

I'm not going to lie, it sucks! It does. But I can promise you one thing, there well come a day when you realise that, ultimately, you have to make the first steps on your own. Only then well others actuallybe able tohelp you.

It was once said that depression is a selfish entity. It takes and takes and gives nothing back. This is a lie, it may break you downbut when you out yourself back together, you will be so much stronger!

Dan is right

I suffered severe depression after my mother died while I was expecting my first child, which was not elected to go full term as I was riddled with TB and if it did, it would be severely deformed. My 10 lb baby boy was born perfect, except for inheriting asthma form his father.

I had hellish depression whilst looking after a baby and as doctors talked over me to my husband a sir I was agoon, I decided to get this under way myself.

you know what I d di?

I took up knitting and within two weeks ha gone form knitting needles to a fully functioning electronic knitting machine and then onto knitting stuff for magazines, one prominent magazine nicking my design! But I did it .

Start small BUT START! Build on it.

YOU CAN DO IT! Even if it is just getting on with a job you have put off for so long, then write it down.

A friend of mine listed all the jobs needing doing on Post IT notes and stuck them on her mirror. She loved to do her make up in that mirror and could only see her face after she took the post it notes down after jobs were done. whacky I know but it worked.

Please that but harder and come back to us and let us know!

Hi there. just wanted to add my support to your cause. I think that keeping busy and doing exercise is a good way of staving off the worst depressive thoughts. Set yourself little targets and give yourself a pat on the back when you have achieved it. Keep a positive data log everyday. try to find at least 2 positive things to write about in your day. Even though you are feeling awful, force yourself to do the things that you know you used to enjoy. I don't know where you live but in Derbyshire you can self-refer to a private counselling service paid for by the NHS. I have just completed 6 CBT sessions and only had to wait a couple of weeks to get seen. Check this possibility out with your GP. Let us know how you get on. We are here for you

I know you are all doing your best to make me feel better but I just don't feel better. It's getting worse and worse each day. This is the worst I have ever felt. I can't be around people because I just want to cry. It does suck, big time! I'm going to go and try to go to sleep now because that's the only time I can escape from it. I want to escape from it so badly.

I don't think counselling is going to help me, i don't want to talk about it anymore, i just want it all to go away. I am fed up of people asking me how i am feeling. I told them i was tired of trying and it was too much for me to deal with and they didn't listen. I just want everything to go away. I don't think i will be coming on here again.

Itssofluffy, I hope you read this but the reason people that people are giving up listening to you is because you are not helping yourself.

This will not go away by itself an you have to chase away your demons yourself. We ALL know how difficult this is BUT, you are the one in charge of your emotions, no-one can help you unless you make superhuman effort to help yourself.

Expectations that things will turn around in a day or two are unrealistic.

I know this may sound harsh but you need to start pulling yourself together! Sleeping is not the answer and only another symptom of depression. Nothing goes away unless you chase it away.

We are here for you but you nut make those first steps yourself.

All advice given here is sound, so follow it.

Please excuse all the typos in my posts, I type as quickly as I think!

So sorry you feel so low and are leaving,but you have found somewhere we will listen and we have all been there and still there some of us.But if you really feel like a rest from here may be at a later date you will come back.Wish you well and hope you find some help.Take Care.

I'm sorry for all the attitude, i have been very up and down. I am grateful for everyone's support. I know that it is only me that can do things to help me get better, but when i am feeling very low i forget this. Feeling low brings tiredness and when i am tired and not eating i sometimes just want to give up. But i know deep down that i don't want to give up, because i try so hard to seek help when i feel desperately low, i walked to A and E and it's quite far! When i am feeling low i think and do silly things, but at the moment the sensible part of my brain keeps winning. I had a silly plan that i was going to just drive off somewhere tomorrow and leave everything behind, i was feeling like it was the only way i could be alone, so i could think about what i wanted to do and get away from having to talk about it and have people ask me how i am feeling. Then this afternoon i took a shower, i spent almost two hours in there just lying curled up in a ball, thinking. It has relaxed me. I decided my plan was silly and wouldn't achieve anything, because eventually i would probably come back and it would just cause everyone a lot of worry, and make me feel worse. That shower helped me see sense and i feel alot calmer now. I decided a better idea would be to make an appointment with my doctor instead, they are probably fed up of seeing me, but there's clearly something not working well for me, i know i didn't get much help at A and E which i was very upset about, and i think the doctors will probably just tell me that i need to wait a bit longer to give the medication a chance, but i won't know if i don't ask. They told me at the hospital aswell that suicidal thoughts could be a side effect of the medication, but even so it was quite a terrifying situation to be in. I expect the doctors can't do anything else to help me anyway though so i am not going to have any expectations.

Hiya,

Glad to hear you feel calmer no need to say sorry we all know how low you can get just think of yourself but also others that would be upset if you did something drastic.Good to hear you are going to the GPs and maybe they will change your medication just stay strong and remember we are all here for you so just come on and rant aŵay we all understand.Take Care.

Hi itssofluffy

Good to see you are back. you are making good choices now, and that is major step.

Keep going and come back to tell us how you are doing.

Nothing wrong with taking a long shower, I take two hour baths every other day, it is my time, my space and all for me to pamper myself!

xx

Hi Jimbo, only just seen your second message because it was waiting for approval. I live in the west midlands, I am not sure about there being a crisis team I can call, you would think the lady at the hospital would have told me whether there was for any situations I might need it again. I will have a look on the nhs website, is this where I would find it if there was one?

I have calmed down a lot since before the weekend but the change of mood happens so quickly I would still like to know what to do if I got into that situation again as the hospital gave me no advice. They really were not very helpful at the hospital, they gave me no advice on what I could do to stop me feeling like this. It was just suggestions that I need to start going out and doing things like hobbies and sports and seeing friends. I know all this and when I am feeling well I do try to do things to keep my mood up. I am not a stupid person, I know that staying by myself isn't helpful for depression, but she didn't seem to understand the way I was feeling. Anyway rant over!

Thanks for your help I will try to find out if there is a crisis team I can call on.

I have had my letter hearing from the NHS counselling service today, so I phoned to book an appointment and they have booked me in for tomorrow because they had a cancellation. They said it will be a 40minute telephone appointment.

Thankyou designergirl, I'm just having a quiet day today, thought I would do a bit of painting.

Hi Fluffy

I'm glad to see you are having a quiet day. they may not be every day but they might come to be more regular if you stay in charge.

The mind can b e a terrible thing when it takes over but all it needs is to be reset to factory settings and you can do it. Remember to reward yourself when you have done good and if the negative feelings come back do something physically exerting to stop them.

xx

There just isn't enough done, for depression. I've discussed this with my doctor. You go to see them, they give you pills and then you're left. Counselling was a complete waste of time, for me and even made me worse talking about my problems.

I think there should be drop-in centre open 24/7 - somewhere where people can go when they feel alone , especially during the night.

If I win the lottery, I will start those centre. It could save so many lives.