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What to tell my gp?

Posted , 10 users are following.

BellaLuna
BellaLuna

Last year in November i had a 'breakdown', it was so out of the blue and without cause or trigger that i began to wonder if it had anything to do with the fact that i have been on diazpam for 17 years.

It didn't take much research to confirm it might be, it seems you can actually have withdrawal symptoms whilst maintaining your dose and i have had/am still having many of them.

I asked my gp who said she didn't think it was possible, in fact 5 weeks ago she increased my dose by 2mg per day, being desperate for relief i accepted this, it has done little to help, i stopped sweating for hours on end and stopped needing the loo 10 times per day but no other changes.

My agoraphobia is worsening, i have depression, i have no sense of balance and feel like my life is over.

I was thinking about taking all the info i have about tolerance withdrawal to my gp and having a discussion with her again but i fear that even if she believes me this time she may cut my dose down too fast.

I know the only way out is a slow taper but doctors seem to want to rush these things and i want to approach the taper at my own pace, at least if she is still prescribing i can do that and i can go back to my current dose if at any time i feel i am not coping but if she cuts the prescription that wont be an option.

Should i go in armed with information and risk her cutting it too quickly or should i hold back, start a slow taper but be scared of her not knowing what i am doing? The idea of doing it without medical support/knowledge terrifies me but then again so does being rushed off.

I'm a bit lost to be honest.

2 likes, 52 replies

52 Replies

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  • linda83143l
    linda83143l BellaLuna

    Posted

    Do it yourself. GPs tend to cut the dose took quickly there for giving you withdrawal symptoms.

    I did it.

    What dose are you on daily and maybe at night?

    You cam do it.

    Mail me anytime xx

    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna linda83143l

      Posted

      Thank you and I am so pleased for you that you did it, it must be a wonderful feeling to be benzo free.

      I think doing it myself is for the best, i know what doctors are like, fast cuts and no allowing for relapses which are frightening prospects.

      My dose is 20mg per day, 9mg in the morning (was 7mg until 5 weeks ago), 4mg at noon and 7mg at night.

      The anxiety did not improve when the dose was increased, the sweating and toilet trips did but not the anxiety and the agoraphobia has worsened.

      I have awful unsteadiness too that is worse until about 3-4pm, it remains but is not as bad as earlier in the day, this makes me think it has something to do with the increased dose.

      1 hour after my morning dose i am struggling to walk around the house, it is now almost 8 hours since my last dose and whilst the floor is still 'moving' i can walk around the house much easier.

      At 10pm i will take my next dose and about 30-60 minutes later i will struggle to walk up the stairs.

      Panic 'zaps' me awake all night, the docs say this is just my anxiety but despite suffering anxiety for many years which at times has been chronic i have never felt this bad and always been able to get myself through a rough patch but this time i can't xx

    • jason_39066
      jason_39066 BellaLuna

      Posted

      GP doctors are idiots. They have no clue on what they perscribe to people. They just dont understand the medicine. Benzos are not meant to be taken long term. Period. It was my GP that perscribed the pain killers and benzos to begin with. Its bad when you understand the medicine more than they do. I guarantee they aren't taking this stuff. Get involved in a hobby you enjoy. Obsessing over it will only make things worse. Find you a good psychiatrist and they can help. There are other medications out there that can help. I nevertook anything befor benzos but now I take 3 meds everyday and Im functional. You will make it through this!
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna jason_39066

      Posted

      Thank you, i agree about gp doctors, mine started with a gp prescribing although i have seen consultants over the years who have been as ignorant, it beggars belief really and no none of them will be on these drugs or advising relatives or friends to take them either.

      Getting off them however hard seems the only answer, there are better meds out there should i need them and i expect i will, you have done so well and i hope one day i can say the same.

  • jason_39066
    jason_39066 BellaLuna

    Posted

    Find a addiction psychiatrist who is benzo wise and come off slow. I am in the middle of the same thing. I have recently come off pain meds, alcohol, and now trying to quit benzos. Dont believe in everything you read on the internet. That will scare you into even more anxiety. Go slow and listen to your body and stay off the internet. We can do this.
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna jason_39066

      Posted

      Thank you, i will look into that although i am not sure how easy it will be to find a psychiatrist who has the right knowledge especially on the NHS, my CPN has been promising me a home visit from the consultant for about 3 weeks now but it has yet to happen.

      I will definitely go slowly though, this is not something that can or should be rushed and i know everyone has a very individual experience of withdrawal too.

      Good luck on your journey to being benzo free smile

  • dave92332
    dave92332 BellaLuna

    Posted

    Hi there

    In my own opinion do it yourself. I myself have been on diazepam since I was 21. I'm now in my mid 30s and in a pretty similar situation to yourself. I'm on 28mg daily and on twice weekly pickups. I've lost everything although I don't have any side effects that are as extreme. Possibly depression.

    I've went armed with information (ASHTON MANUAL & GMC PRESCRIBING PDF) that ANY and ALL benzodiazepine prescibing gps and phyciatrists definitely know about.

    It seems they're trained to be ignorant and they even deny there is any withdrawal symptoms. There's allot of stuff coming to light about just how horrific it can be from person to person and I think its a basic case of plausible denial. As soon as its recognised they'll be paying out millions. Hence the reason that there is NO help or rehabs for benzodiazepine addiction, but if you're a heroin addict there's lots of substitution options.

    Personally I'm terrified of coming down and off as its really unpleasant .

    God speed

    I wish you all the best .

    Were definitely on our own so cut down using your full prescription as required

    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna dave92332

      Posted

      Thank you and i'm sorry to hear you are in a similar situation yourself.

      It makes complete sense as to why these doctors are in denial, they are inflicting the problem by prescribing these drugs and of course the fall out of admitting they knew would be huge, personally i am furious that i was never warned about any of this but that cannot be changed now.

      I am terrified too, if i am this ill now i dread think what is to come but i try to think that although it will be a long, hard road it may well be the only route to what will eventually be a better life.

      I don't read the horror stories anymore, i just seek out tapering information and support as i am clueless on where to start or rather i was.

      My plan is to cut 0.5mg and hold, see what happens then carry on, it's slower than ashton says but for me i'd rather go a bit slower and get there in time than go faster because i am so ill as it is.

      Benzos really are a nightmare.

  • dave92332
    dave92332 BellaLuna

    Posted

    I also agree with Jason on the fact of staying off of the internet.

    Any time that I've went cold turkey my biggest problems seem to be socialising which is horrendous for me . I don't seem to get vertigo or particularly shakey. I personally just feel really nervous around new people which makes me clam up and in a way I become very shy and introvert. Its mind boggling considering I was always so confident and outgoing. When I stop I cant look anyone in the eye , my stomach churns all the time and I get palps but I wouldn't say I get panic attacks.

    Its definitely mind over matter .

    Also stay away from benzobuddies . I've noticed on a few threads there's people trying to promote it. I find the site a complete circus. Especially when you have people telling horror stories experiancing every known symptom after only being prescribed 5mg for 3-4 months.

    All the best

    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna dave92332

      Posted

      That's the key issue with these meds, they seem to produce issues that are baffling in the sense that you never had them before, i used to love going out, would travel for miles as a hobby yet now i panic at the thought of opening my front door.

      I did find benzobuddies confusing, there was a lot of conflicting advice and also you end up thinking your own withdrawal will be like the ones there, some awful, some not so bad so it sends your head into a spin when really the only withdrawal experience you need to be concentrating on is your own.

    • linda83143l
      linda83143l carol20979

      Posted

      Carol where do you find benzo buddies, I want to see exactly what its,about x Linda
  • tootsie58
    tootsie58 BellaLuna

    Posted

    I have just read what dave as said about benzobuddies.

    Dave you are so wrong. Some people do suffer after only taking benzos even for a few weeks.

    What you have to remember is that we are all different. Some people can just stop taking benzos with no problems.

    I happen to be a member of BB and if it wasnt for this forum. I wouldnt be sat here

    today. I would probably be still on the psych ward being fed more benzos.

    Because here in the UK they havent got a clue on how to taper you off your benzo. Because you are not supposed to come off your benzo.

    I am now benzo and drug free just over 30 months. I was told that i needed to take mine for the rest of my life.

    • dave92332
      dave92332 tootsie58

      Posted

      I'm not gonna be drawn into an oppinuated argument over a site which has very little to no UK members.

      So lets just agree to disagree ok toots!

      What I don't understand is why I have 2private messages from yourself promoting a site, which if you're 30months clean from benzodiazepines serves you no interest.

      Surely after 2½ years of sobriety its time to let go .

      At least on these smaller forums the advice isn't all doom and gloom. Just as Jason said above ... Stay off the internet as much as possible. Its true as half to 90% of all they symptoms come from pre-existing disorders made worse by benzos.

      Thanks for both you're invites but ive already been on and I find it a pantomime.

      Just my opinion

    • tootsie58
      tootsie58 dave92332

      Posted

      I am not going to get into a argument either. With regards to my pm to you.

      I did not get notification that i had one from you until I had posted to bella.

      You ask why do i promote about benzobuddies and that i am benzo free myself.

      Perhaps it is because that I care and that I dont want others to go through what I did.

      Yes in one sense it is time to let go but it is people like me that is getting the word out that coming off benzos is possible.

      You are so right about there not being many from the UK. Perhaps it is because people in the UK trust their doctors and havent got a  clue as to what is going on re their benzo.

      It wasnt until i researched and realised that i had become tolerant to my benzo. I was already on teh highest dose for sleep. My GP told me to take more. He was as cluless as most Drs are where benzos are concerned.

       

    • carol20979
      carol20979 dave92332

      Posted

      You know Dave advice is just that it is a treasure to have some one like Tootsie there to share experiences with as this can be a lonely journey. I tried the benzo buddies site but I do like this one better.But I do not question her motives or sincerity. 
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