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What to tell my gp?

Posted , 10 users are following.

BellaLuna
BellaLuna

Last year in November i had a 'breakdown', it was so out of the blue and without cause or trigger that i began to wonder if it had anything to do with the fact that i have been on diazpam for 17 years.

It didn't take much research to confirm it might be, it seems you can actually have withdrawal symptoms whilst maintaining your dose and i have had/am still having many of them.

I asked my gp who said she didn't think it was possible, in fact 5 weeks ago she increased my dose by 2mg per day, being desperate for relief i accepted this, it has done little to help, i stopped sweating for hours on end and stopped needing the loo 10 times per day but no other changes.

My agoraphobia is worsening, i have depression, i have no sense of balance and feel like my life is over.

I was thinking about taking all the info i have about tolerance withdrawal to my gp and having a discussion with her again but i fear that even if she believes me this time she may cut my dose down too fast.

I know the only way out is a slow taper but doctors seem to want to rush these things and i want to approach the taper at my own pace, at least if she is still prescribing i can do that and i can go back to my current dose if at any time i feel i am not coping but if she cuts the prescription that wont be an option.

Should i go in armed with information and risk her cutting it too quickly or should i hold back, start a slow taper but be scared of her not knowing what i am doing? The idea of doing it without medical support/knowledge terrifies me but then again so does being rushed off.

I'm a bit lost to be honest.

2 likes, 52 replies

52 Replies

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  • jason_39066
    jason_39066 BellaLuna

    Posted

    Benzo buddies to me is not a good place for someone who is scared to be. I know the people are nice and compassionate but its all horror stories. The only reason benzo buddies exists for people suffering. Most people that do get off this stuff never look back. Millions of people have done it and so can you! The mind is fragile and the last thing anyone wants to read is how awful life is going to be. Positivity is what we need here. Nobody ever post's about successful tapers because they are too busy living their lives. Go slow, enjoy the day, and dont give up!
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna jason_39066

      Posted

      Thank you, i have nothing against the people there, i have had some lovely people advising me in ways they genuinely feel are helpful and there are some very nice members who are truly compassionate but it's confusing because it's a lot of people with a lot of mixed opinions and my mind is already so very muddled so i can't take it all in.

       

    • tootsie58
      tootsie58 jason_39066

      Posted

      Jason there are sucess stories on BB.

      And as for tapering off benzos. You have to remember that we are all different and what works for one doesnt work for another.

      BB is there to help people as there is no help from the medical professionals.

    • dave92332
      dave92332 BellaLuna

      Posted

      You're quite right Bella. The information on some of the sites is very conflicting. The Ashton manual is only a guide as well.

      I notice that you split doses. I've always just taken mine in the morning or midday. I personally seem to be ok as long as there is benzos in my system.

      I initially went daily to start tapering. In the past year I've had allot to deal with and that's not happened. Sometimes I fear or get anxious at the thought of going out, but I notice that once in out and about I feel better.

      Fresh air gives you a natural head rush which can cause anxiety.

      What I've noticed is that overthinking or obsessing about an appointment or event makes you dread it. There's allot of brain training involved. Working definitely helped me first time I quit. Stupidity I went back after 8 months off.

      On another note, I know many people who have been on benzodiazepines and for years that have been taken off them completely with only slight anxiety. Most of them wouldn't ever google diazepam or look for side effects. Its not there way. So I've always wondered if there is any truth to ignorance being bliss.

      Come down and off as slowly and as comfortable as possible.

      Good luck and keep us posted

    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna dave92332

      Posted

      Thank you, yes some people have said that the tapering plans in the Ashton manual were too fast, others managed fine so it shows that experiences are very indivdual and that these things even when written by knowledgable people can only be used as a guide.

      I have the 3 doses and if I am even an hour late with one I really feel it, not in the sense of anxiety symptoms but muscle tension and feeling unable to think.

      I was once caught up at an appointment, actually lost track of time and wondered why I felt so strange, I was 2 hours late on my lunchtime dose and felt fine again about 30 minutes or so after taking it.

      I agree about the overthinking, almost everything I have done recently has had to be spur of the moment, I planned an outing and suffered terribly before and during then today we went to the cinema totally last minute and although I felt very wobbly and nervous it was better than the planned one that I had been dwelling on.

      I know what you mean about ignorance being bliss too, information can be useful but there does come a point where you can know too much and in that respect I think often we can suffer more.

      I was taken off it once after 3 weeks of ow dose use, my gp at that time just stopped it, I did suffer horribly and ended up back on it (regret that now) but back then there was no internet to look things up on and on reflection I am glad, it was a horrible time without having those additional fears there.

      I will certainly take it slowly, I am so ill as it is that I don't want to make it harder than it needs to be, it's also my daughter's birthday in a few weeks so I really don't want to be even more unwell in time for that.

      Hopefully one day I can post back that I am having some success with tapering.

  • edna69270
    edna69270 BellaLuna

    Posted

    Taper off on your own. I am trying to do the same thing. We can tell If we are cutting back too fast. I hoe you can do this slowly.  It is very hard. I am trying.
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna edna69270

      Posted

      Thank you, yes I think doing it our own way is best, good luck with your taper, I know it's very difficult and I really hope it goes well for you.
  • valerie39285
    valerie39285 BellaLuna

    Posted

    I am trying to taper off Diazepam too. I am doing the daily liquid tapering method and am now down from 12mg to 4.5mg daily. I had reached ‘Tolerance’ so I had no other choice but to take my ‘life’ into my own hands – that’s the scary part or at least it was for me! I joined BenzoBuddies and spent a good few weeks reading posts in all sections and gathering as much information as I could. My taper was relatively easy while I was above 5mg. I started off by tapering 1mg every 14 days. It was only when I had reached 5 mg that ‘serious’ problems began, but I managed to pluck up enough courage to post on BB’s and ask for help. I was amazed at the response that I immediately got… they were so very helpful; they understood; they explained why they thought I was experiencing such problems; suggested what I could do to ease the situation, etc., etc. The advice I received from BenzoBuddies members was a ‘lifesaver’ for me as I had reached the point where I thought that I couldn’t take anymore! I’m ‘holding’ at 4.5mg at the moment and today most of the w/d symptoms are gone and I feel quite confident in that I understand how to listen to my ‘body’ now and will know when to commence tapering again. My ‘Tolerance’ symptoms were similar to yours so my heart goes out to you in your suffering. Good luck on your journey to being benzo free. I’m not there yet but this morning I took my dog out for a walk – my first ‘trip’ over the doorstep in over a year! I’m getting there and I hope you will too! 
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna valerie39285

      Posted

      Thank you, I did post on BB for advice, lovely people but with so many varying experiences I just found it all a bit confusing, it doesn't help that I  am so unwell at the moment because everything feels confusing and overwhelming.

      It sounds like you have done incredibly well with your taper, that is a brilliant reduction that you have made and I'm so pleased that you are seeing good results now, that walk was incredible and such a huge step in the right direction, it's actually exciting to think of the good possibilities that come with tapering and it's what makes me want to do it.

      The tolerance symptoms are awful, I knew one day it would stop working but never knew I could possibly have withdrawal symptoms whilst still taking it, if I had know that I never would have started them but it's no use looking back now, the only way is forward.

      Good luck with the rest of your taper, you are doing great.

  • carol20979
    carol20979 BellaLuna

    Posted

    I was on xanax for lack of sleep that was caused by anxiety. My Dr. gave me .05 dosage it was ok for quite a while I did not take it evey night.After  four years of this I now feel withdrawal if I do not take it every night. My Dr.seems clueless as to how to get off this stuff. I researched the Ashton method and told her my plan.So now I am on 10 mg of valium and plan a very slow, 1mg reduction over along period of time it takes the brain a long time to go back to normal. I am on steroids for PMR and have learned the value of slow reduction from it.I plan to return to my Dr. and get 2 mg tabs so I can reduce 1mg at a time.I know this may take months to accomplish.I was referred to benzo buddies but have always found this site more responsive.Go very very slowly in your reduction, give your brain time to adjust. Good luck be positive you can do this!
    • linda83143l
      linda83143l carol20979

      Posted

      Are you in th UK?

      There is C.A.D.A.S and UNITY If you want their numbers let me know

      There is also lifeline.

      If you are really down and need to chat ring Samaritans for,a chat you dont have to be suicidal to speak to them

      Xx

    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna carol20979

      Posted

      Thank you, I really hope your taper from valium goes as smoothly as possible for you, slow is definitely the way to go with this, I don't mind that because I'd rather take months and suffer less than try to rush it and feel worse than I need to, time, patience and positive thinking all seem to be key with this.
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna linda83143l

      Posted

      Hi linda, I use the samaritans and find them to be absolutely wonderful, I am in the UK and would really appreciate the numbers of the others too, thank you xx
    • carol20979
      carol20979 BellaLuna

      Posted

      Patience is the key I also keep a very detailed journal that has been invaluable in tracking syptoms and reactions. After a while patterns will develope and they can be a guide for you to track your progress. I highly recommend this.I also call it my cheap therapy as I vent my frustration in it.As I like to say I can vent there but my journal doesn't judge me ! We can do this ! stay positive as I like to say live to fight another day! hugs to you!!
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna carol20979

      Posted

      What a great idea, it probably sounds a bit odd but at the moment I feel like two people, one with symptoms of anxiety and agoraphobia and one with side effects of benzo use, it can be incredibly hard to tell the difference between my natural anxiety and my benzo related symptoms and I imagine withdrawal to be much the same.

      Thank you for the excellent idea.

    • carol20979
      carol20979 BellaLuna

      Posted

      Yes,keeping a journal will help you sort ths out. Be specific as possible track changes you feel throughout the day note times etc.I know this sounds anal but you will see a pattern of mood and behavior.The good thing is you can go back in the journal to find prior occurances and look at that day as to what when and how. What happened what you took etc. It gives you a broader picture of what is happening and hopefully help. Like solving a puzzle.
    • carol20979
      carol20979 BellaLuna

      Posted

      Keep a very detailed journal,as to time of day how you feel what and when you took something. After a while you can look back in the journal to look for symptoms and what might have been the cause.It is amazing how often patterns become apparent. I also vent to my journal. I find writing out my feelings to be stress releasing.
    • BellaLuna
      BellaLuna carol20979

      Posted

      I will definitely do that, the problem with being so unwell is that you become confused with it and can't make sense of what could potentially be very obvious looking back on a journal, I can imagine the stress relief must be great too, I could certainly use some of that.
    • linda83143l
      linda83143l

      Posted

      Hi Carol.

      UNITY

      01228 882299

      CADAS

      01228544140

      If you ring Samaritans use this number

      116123

      You,will not be charged,

      Hope it helps xx linda

    • linda83143l
      linda83143l carol20979

      Posted

      Start with Social Services,and,ask them for,a list of numbers and organisations that can help you.

      Samaritans have lists of numbers next time you speak ask them

      Hope this helps Carol

      With live, Linda x

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