when will it all end ?
Posted , 9 users are following.
Hi I'm 52 and been suffering years now with the menopause thought I was just going round the bend but after reading these posts I don't feel like that now, My periods just stopped 3 years ago and never seen or spotted again so in that way I have been lucky but mental health wise anxiety and depression hot sweats vomiting without warning have blighted my life. I've only just bothered going to see a doctor as I just thought I couldn't cope any longer but didn't really get anywhere I take Paroxetine and diazepam and trying to control such negativity and weird thoughts in my mind. I worry about my health and dying and loosing my husband but assume that's the menopause after reading some posts I feel like I'm just waiting to die I have some agoraphobia and can't leave the house alone but will go to the shops in a car with my husband. Can I ask when you use the term peri or pari what does that mean ? Also how long do you think menopause symptoms carry on for ?
Hello btw xxxx
3 likes, 37 replies
jayneejay cazjaz16
Posted
sorry your feeling like this, i can totally relate and have felt the same
you must be post menopause then ..
12-14 months no periods is post menopause .( following peri)
peri menopause or premenopause is the years leading to post menopause .
jay x
kristi63 jayneejay
Posted
cazjaz16
Posted
jayneejay cazjaz16
Posted
i began peri menopause age 39/40 and it went on for 10 years.
had hot flushes, anxiety, felt faint, wobbly, night sweats, achey body, periods became irregular etc .
I didnt take HRT. Still dont ..
i am now 18 months post menopause and still dont feel right .. So it doesnt really end when you reach post meno ( not for me )
every woman different, no set time limite etc ..
i do have annual well woman checks now, and i have been confirmed post menopause etc ...
after peri, then it seems other things start, like vaginal dryness. etc, lack of energy ... Seems to just continue ..
( i have had shingles recently and 3 slipped disks in back) so i am trying to see if the way i still feel is down to that or menopause.
jay x
cazjaz16 jayneejay
Posted
jennifer01077 cazjaz16
Posted
I am so sorry things are so hard for you. A friend of mine has agoraphobia, but she has started to leave her house a little bit, very recently. Her husband is so supportive.
Did you just start on the Paroxetine? If so, it does take six weeks to start working. And if it doesn't work, you can try a different anti-depressant. And also, I remember when I started on it, I felt a lot of side effects like extreme sleepiness. I think it will wear off.
I think the problems with depression or anxiety are really strong during menopause because of estrogen peaking, with very low progesterone. So HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) might be really helpful for you. It looks like you are the perfect age for it. I think you can stay on it for ten years quite safely.
I am glad you got on this website! You sound like you've been suffering alone for a long time.
I guess your vomiting might be caused by nervous tension (they say the stomach is a second brain). Both the practices of 'conscious relaxation' and 'meditation' might help you. You can find out about them on the web. These practices cannot (in my experience) help like medication can, but they do improve the quality of your life once you have a kind of baseline mental health.
I learned to control my hot sweats with by eating less carbs, or eating carbs more spaced out during the day (5 times a day, rather than three). I also try to eat low glycemic index food generally. You can find out about them on the web too.
Good luck with trying new things. I know personally how hard it is when you are suffering from anxiety and depression. Really hard. I hope some suggestions are helpful for you.
Best wishes,
\Jennifer
cazjaz16 jennifer01077
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jennifer01077 cazjaz16
Posted
I do use progesterone cream. There's a lot of controversy about it, but it really helps me.
jennifer01077
Posted
kristi63 jennifer01077
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liggy42062 jennifer01077
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jennifer01077 liggy42062
Posted
I think progesterone was my first step to taking care of menopause symptoms, so probably I have been on it for about 5 years.
I found the same as you, that going off it really made things worse, so I stay on it all month, and I use a whole tube each month. (that's 4 oz, or 112 grams). I am using about twice as much as the bottle says.
I do think I am very estrogen-dominant, although (knock on wood) the estrogen is going down now I am 51. My periods have become less heavy and few clots, so it's changing.
The week a few days before and during my period must be very progesterone low because my depression becomes really strong despite being on anti-depressants. I had a month off work, so I could notice it particularly. I plan to really lay on the progesterone next month at that time. Ovulation is also a high-estrogen time. It's only a few days, but I am going to keep my eye on it. Roughly, I think estrogen makes the depression worse, but we will see after menopause.
Because I suffer from depression, like you, I have to deal with the symptoms of menopause really aggressively.
I hope this helps you Liggy, and it's nice to talk to someone else on anti-depressants. I use Luvox, 150 mgs a day. (that's fluoxetine) and I think the only side-effect I notice is lack of sex drive, which is fine because I am single anyway. Maybe my memory is worse, but it's always been pretty bad. I've been on it for about 10 years or so.
I am sorry you suffer from side effects. Can you tell me about them? I am just curious, so please don't bother if you don't want to, or if you are busy. I don't want to intrude.
Lastly, exercise. It really does help. It's important not to overdo it, and even a long walk three times a week will make a big difference.
Warm wishes,
Jennifer
liggy42062 jennifer01077
Posted
My mom and my sisters have been able to take antidepressants for their anxiety but every brand I tried makes me feel like I am gonna literally jump out of my skin. It is very scary. I have been able to take benzodiazepines in the past but I haven't asked my doctor for,any because I don't want to become dependent on them and have a hard time stopping. I am just using GABA bilingual tablets 2-3.times a day and they keep me calm for the most part, except when I am not also using my progesterone cream. Then I feel really nervous, cold, and worried.
This time of our lives with no pattern to hormone changes make it hard to manage symptoms, that's for sure. With tips and encouragement from everyone in this group I have been finding it a lot easier though than before. So glad I found this group! 😊
Ruthie49 cazjaz16
Posted
Sorry to hear you have been suffering but glad you have found this forum. It's helped me a lot.
I'm nearly 50 and still menstruating. I've suffered many physical and mental symptoms in the last year which have coincided with a change in my menstrual cycle leading up to menopause. I can relate to the anxiety and depression you describe and that awful feeling that you're waiting to die, as though your life suddenly feels over but you can't work out why because you know you have everything to live for, it just doesn't feel like it. It's a trick of depressive thinking brought on by the hormones. It will pass, I firmly believe it.
I think you are through the worst of it and will start to see an improvement soon. I remember my mother going through the change. She had a hard time for eight years before her periods stopped at 50. She thought she was through it but then suffered more problems in her early 50s. But by 55 she really was like a different woman - much calmer and I've never known her depressed since (she's nearly 80 now). By 60 years old she seemed happier and younger than ever! So there is hope.
I hope you turn a corner soon xx
annieschaefer Ruthie49
Posted
If nothing else, this has taught me to not react when another women may act out. Before I would think WTH, now it's I understand and let things go.
Thanks again for sharing!
Annie
caroleUJ62 Ruthie49
Posted
I experience depression and panic/anxiety big time. I know exactly hwat you mean about thinking your'e life is nearly over. I would really like to try HRT. I'm on Ad's already. Up to even six months ago I felt relatively youthful, was looking forward to my sone being 18, the excitement of him going to university, the relative freedom me and my husband would have to do lots of nice things together. We hadnt even totally ruled out living abroad again. We lived in the Far East for a few years where my son was born.
Now I can hardly even walk out of the house on my own, - mostly its just to the shops in the car with husband, I feel so panicky all the time.
I have suffered from depression for some years, but have been off the AD's for over 2 years now, then it all came flooding back. I'm sleeping badly, have feelings of dread, am not interested in the outside world because all news seems bad, have creaking aching joints, and the hot flushes have started. OMG, does it really have to be this bad????