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Why can't I escape the pain of depression

Posted , 13 users are following.

gillian0503
gillian0503

I really am on a low at the moment and really looking for an easy way out as I can't take the pain anymore.  My heart physically hurts and I feel like I am pushing everyone away who is trying to help me.  I have never felt lonliness like it and although it really gets me down, I don't want anyone's company (does that make sense) .   I am on anti-depressants and have been for many years.  The doctors tells me it will pass but it never does.  A smile that hides a thousand sorrows and i feel like I'm drowning while everyone around me is living their life.

 

1 like, 55 replies

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  • lostsoul0604
    lostsoul0604 gillian0503

    Posted

    I'm in your same shoes. I didn't feel like myself yesterday, hardly slept, i was so restless. I began to cry for no apparent reason. Im not ready to give up. I have a 7 year old son who needs me. Why am i feeling this way. I just want help. Ive been on Antidepressants for about 3 months my doctor had me switched to a different antidepressant and im guessing thats what caused the sudden depression symptoms. I hope i get well. Im tired of this. sad crying for hours hurts me too much. 
    • gillian0503
      gillian0503 lostsoul0604

      Posted

      Lost Soul it's horrible being like this, please give the medication time to work it can take a few weeks, I have spent most of today crying too and it does get you down, it makes you tired and even more withdrawn.  I too have children and like you they need me.  Its a difficult situation to be in and I have been in this position for so long now it has become who I am. Please stay strong and talk if you need to, we are all here, dealing with the same issues. 

      xxx

    • lostsoul0604
      lostsoul0604 gillian0503

      Posted

      Thank you for replying to me. Ive cone to this site in hope of help. I just dont understand it. I honestly have no true reason to be depressed. Everyone here has gone through terrible experiences and ive gone through nothing. I wish you nothing but the best. My heart goes out to you. 
    • anne240
      anne240 lostsoul0604

      Posted

      Gillian is right.  I have battled for over 20 years.  Been as low can be, but I fought and fought.  I am still here, and still fighting.  I know it is difficult, and you really feel you cannot go on any longer, or find the strength to continue, but you do, somehow.  There does not have to be a reason for depression, sometimes it just comes out of nowhere.

      We all support each other here.  I hope we give each other strength to fight depression.  It can be so lonely.  Over the years I have read a gret deal about to help myself.  Yes there have been difficult times when dealing with depression, but I always feel things will get better, and I am a lot better than I was. 

      Don't give up.  Come here and talk to us, and hopefully it will help.  We all need support.

      God bless you and your family

      Anne

    • gillian0503
      gillian0503 lostsoul0604

      Posted

      Depression can hit us for no apparent reason, you can have all the wealth in the world and be the unhappiest person due to depression.  I often wonder if it's somehow in our genes and we are more suseptible to it than others, whatever the reason it hits us whether we like it or not.  I wish you well and hope that you find some comfort on here listening to others and realising your not actually alone in all this.

      Take Care xx

  • gillian20097
    gillian20097 gillian0503

    Posted

    Hello.

    Please don't ever give up. The process of finding the correct medication to suit you can sometimes mean months on each one. Some people try numerous for months on end thinking none will ever work and then find one that does. 

    I know how you both are feeling. I've felt exactly that way too. Ive been to the point where I've felt hopeless and lost,thinking that I will never get better. I've felt desperate and sad and scared. Sometimes I don't know what got me through or how I got through but I did. Somewhere deep inside us all is hope and somewhere deep inside us all is a fighter. Don't let this illness take any more from you. Get through today the best way you can. Think about tomorrow when it comes. And if tomorrow is like today,get through that day too. It will be worth it. One day all your pain will end. You will wake up and that cloud will be lifted and you will be so proud of yourself and your strength.

     

    • gillian0503
      gillian0503 gillian20097

      Posted

      Hi Gillian

      I am feeling a bit better today, went a long walk last night and really cleared my head.  Maybe not how I want to be be but better than yesterday which is good.  That feeling of desperation is still with me and the lonliness follows me everywhere but I'm still here and I am grateful for that. 

      I do not know how I would have got through the last few days without the help and support from everyone on here and for that I am truly grateful.  Its just so comforting to know that out there somewhere there is someone like me and they are struggling too and the fact that we can come together on here and help each other out is just overwhelming.

      Thank you once more for your kindness. xx

  • lawren26693
    lawren26693 gillian0503

    Posted

    Hey Gillian, you are not alone.  I have been there.  It sounds as if you are seeing a doctor which is good. Often, antidepressants are not always a cure. You also should incorporate other things besides medications.

    One thing you can do is to do volunteer work.  This helps take away the focus on you and focus on other people or animals. I do volunteer work at the animal shelter near me. 

    Other things you can do is to find a hobby that will take your mind off of your present situation.  I enjoy doing jigsaw puzzles.  Also, exercise is a big help. Try to exercise for at least 5 days a week 30 minutes a day.  I run 5 miles 5 days a week and I do strength training exercises using weights.

    If you do things that take your mind off you and focus on other things, this can help.  What activities you do, make it a regular activity.  Hope this helps....

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