why did i test positive and my partner didn't?

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I have been diagnosed with hsv 2 last week, my partner tested negative.  I dont understand that how is it possible that i only have it? we had unprotected sex for a month. We are both depressed.  I feel disgusted with myself for having this. We care about eachother alot but i do not want to give him this nasty disease. Were both saddened by not being able to be with eachother. How do people continue to have a sex life if u can always transmit the disease? ?

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  • Posted

    I totally agree and feel your anguish. Do you have any signs or symptoms? Why did you get tested in the first place? What kind of test was done on you? I don't want to have sex with someone in fear of transmitting too. From what I've read wearing a condom reduces transmission by 50% , also taking antiviral meds a few days prior to having sex or not having sex during an outbreaks. 

    Your sex partner should be tested again in 3-6 months to see if he has any antibodies against herpes. I was tested recently and told by my doctor positive for herpes 1&2 from past exposure and negative for resent, yet my first outbreak was 3 1/2 weeks ago with one sore on shaft of penis two days after a blow job. I'm still in the process of trying to figure this all out, but in the mean time don't plan on having sex. It's the price imhave to pay for not being  careful

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    • Posted

      Hi Eugene no i do not have any symptoms. I ended a 4yr relationship earlier this year. The last time i had gotten tested was last yr in nov and everything came out negative . when i started dating my new partner i thought i was clean cuz i had only been with my ex bf for the last 4yrs. Well now that i am dating a new guy my ex bf decided to tell me he was not faithful when we were together.  So right away i went to get tested again and sure enough i tested positive for herpes 2. (I had blood and urine tests taken). My new partner was sure he had it since we had been having unprotected sex for a month straight,  but all his tests came out negative. Wich is bitter sweet cuz if we had it together atleast we would deal with it together.   Although i am happy that he does not have it. But now we care about eachother alot and dont know what to do, he does not want me out of his life and i do not want him out of mine. But i just feel so gross and ashamed and im scared to give him anything as i read u can still transmit it to someone even if u use a condom and take the meds.
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    • Posted

      You must of tested positive from past exposure, which means your ex could of given it to you and it takes 3 to 6 months to test positive. If you are viral shedding and have skin to skin contact or sex then your new partner can contract herpes. Most people are unaware have herpes and that's why so prevalent. Some people act like its nothing, but I don't agree.
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    • Posted

      The virus is underneath skin like when having a outbreak and surfaces when where is can be transmitted or contracted. I just came out of doctor office and said I could transmit it anytime to someone.sad
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    • Posted

      Hi 

      As I read all these letters and consider my own situation which I think is that I have herpes 2 but it's hard to be 100per cent sure until you get the positive symptoms, I am thinking why do we all feel so much shame for something we didn't ask for okay maybe some us could have taken more precautions but even so nobody wants it or deserves it we all just after love and intimacy and then along comes stds and all the s**t that comes with it. I really do believe I am a good person who shouldn't gave to feel ashamed about a virus

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    • Posted

      Thats the thing i didn't have any symptoms but i tested positive for genital herpes 2, and ya i agree we shouldn't feel ashamed because its not like we wanted to get it, but cmon the name itself sounda nasty, then the fact that u get sores is gross sad but it does help a lil too see that i am not alone and can talk to u guys on here.
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    • Posted

      You can test without symptoms via the HSV-1/2 IgG antibody blood test, which is type-specific. Only lesion testing requires an outbreak/symptoms, obviously.
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    • Posted

      I've seen you talking on many posts and you seem to know what you are talking about FelisCatus. I just found out im positive a few days ago and ive been with the same guy for two years. Do you know if he gets blood tests ( as he has never had symptoms) will it show up or not? Ive read so many websites that contradicte each other i dont know what to believe. 
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    • Posted

      Thank you! smile If he has carried HSV for around 3 months or longer, then the IgG type-specific antibody test will pick it up regardless of symptoms or not. Certainly for HSV-2 and probably for HSV-1, although the latter apparently misses some infections. A positive by IgG will not tell you the location of the infection without symptoms, however, but Type 2 is nearly always genital and Type 1 usually oral but could be genital. The IgM antibody test and PCR blood test (not swab) are useless for herpes, so are not recommended. Which type did you test positive for, and how?
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    • Posted

      How does he know if the infection is past or recent? Did your doctor explain that? because all I've been told is there's no way to know
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    • Posted

      Negative IgG + positive swab = new infection. Positive IgG + positive swab = "older" infection (over 2-3 months). Low index value that increases dramatically over a month or two = likely new infection. High index value that remains similar over a month or two = established infection. There is no test that can tell exactly, but there are ways to assess situations in some cases.
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    • Posted

      I just found out I was positive for HSV 1 and HSV 2. I went to be tested for trich because my partner told me he had been unfaithful and contracted it. So I decided to get tested for everything. I had the IgG test done and of course I was positive. Well he goes to the doctor and they do a swab test of his mouth and he says he received a negative result. How is that possible when he's the only person I've been with for years. All my test were negative last year. My doctor is adamant that he should have had the same test as I did. But he's hell bound on him taking the right test and that I'm at fault.
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    • Posted

      He is scared, hiding something and/or in denial. Do *not* take any blame from him and insist that he tests properly (IgG) before pointing fingers. His negative oral swab means absolutely *nothing*. Besides, HSV-2 is nearly always genital, so how is an oral swab supposed to test for that? Lmao, that's quite the joke and I'd be mad as hėll, because if you tested negative for IgG a year ago and have only been with him since, then you are not the source...
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    • Posted

      I was reading ur comment n I wanted 2 find out wen I go 2 da doctors if I jus got it or been had wat kind of test do I tell them 2 find out
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    • Posted

      If you're trying to establish whether this is a new infection or not, you need a positive swab test (viral culture or pcr) and an IgG (not IgM) antibody blood test done within a couple of weeks or so of a first outbreak. If the IgG is negative, then the herpes infection confirmed by the swab test is new. If already positive, then you've had herpes for at least a few months or longer.
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    • Posted

      Hi FelisCatus. How are you? What tests should i do to know if i am positive for herpes? I've done the blood test and it came out negative. But i do get symptoms. Thats why i want to know which test i should do to make sure if i actually have it or not. Thank you very much in advanced (excuse any grammer mistakes English is not my first language) xx

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    • Posted

      If you have lesions, you should get them swabbed within the first couple of days, if possible. Viral culture or (even better) pcr swab. In the absence of lesions and after 3 months from exposure, you can do the HSV-1&2 IgG antibody test (*not* IgM). Is that the blood test you did?

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    • Posted

      I did igg and igm. But today my dokter did confirmed that i actually have herpes. I showed him some pictures of a sore that i had. Is there something that can help me feel less tired? I've read that herpes causes you to feel tired and exhausted.

      Thank you very much for answering back

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    • Posted

      How did your doctor confirm that you have herpes? By looking at a photo? That is not exactly accurate, if so. Personally, I would do the IgG test only at 3+ months or a swab the next time you have lesions. Herpes does not typically make people feel tired/exhausted, especially not after the first outbreak. Are you sure it's related?

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    • Posted

      I will go to my doctor the next time i get lesions to do a swab test. The doctors here are so difficult its like they dont want to perform certain tests on people.

      Ive read about it online and saw that other people also had problems with being extremely tired or feel like havnt slept enough

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    • Posted

      The first outbreak can be accompanied by malaise and other flu-like symptoms (so likely tiredness and exhaustion as well), but recurrences are usually mild, sometimes barely noticeable, with few other symptoms besides the physical outbreak. At least that is true for many people. How often do you feel tired and exhausted? Is it constant?
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    • Posted

      Hello, im having trouble acceptting i have genital herpes type 2 also from my ex partner from being unfaithful in out long term relationship. I want to find someone new but im scared of rejection because of.this sad

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    • Posted

      Is it possible for your partner to test different than you? I tested positive for hsv-2 & my partner tested positive for hsv-1 but negative for hsv-2.

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    • Posted

      Yes. It's possible for a couple to have only one HSV type each and to not have infected the other. Actually, the partner with established Type 2 should not get Type 1, but the one with Type 1 (whether established or not) can still get Type 2. Just fyi.

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    • Posted

      so if I had got it from my partner would we both have the same type or can they be different?
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    • Posted

      If he only has Type 1, then you got Type 2 from someone else. They are two different and separate viruses, albeit somewhat related.
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    • Posted

      he had type 2 and I gave him oral sex and ended up with type 1. I had been tested before and came back negative for both types until he tested positive for genital. How does that work?
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    • Posted

      It doesn't. Either he also had Type 1, or you already did, and it was missed by the test (can happen with Type 1). Type 2 cannot give Type 1, or vice versa. Only Type 1 can give Type 1, or Type 2 gives Type 2.

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    • Posted

      Hi I'm not to sure how to use these things so I just jumped on someone's conversation but I'm pretty sure I've been exposed to herpes type 2, I had sex with some guy I knew months ago in May 2016 and his

      Ex-gf messaged me after saying they have herpes; he denied it and I thought she was just crazy and wanted me to stay away from him but anyways I thought I was having an outbreak last Thursday cause there was bumps in the inside that aren't usually there but they weren't painful just itchy so I finally went and got my blood drawn on Thursday and today I got a vaginal exam she said the exam looked perfectly fine it was all in my head but then told me they tested my blood as if I was an 84 year old so the test was inaccuracte and can not be used but the test came back for my blood being an 84 year old it was postitive for type 1 and 2. But there retesting it and letting me know next week what the actually results will be cause I'm 22 and levels are different or something but I'm going crazy not knowing!! Has anyone run across this kind of thing before?? And am I most likely going to turn up positive cause there should be no herpe strains even present in my blood whether I'm 84 or 22 right?! Someone please shed some light!! I'm going crazy and my boyfriend hates my guts right now:'( cause I probably gave him herpes now too. But if anyone knows anything that could be helpful please comment!! And sorry for who ever post I kind of took over I'm really sorry!! I just don't know how to use this and I was just using the newest one I saw!

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    • Posted

      Sorry, but I have no idea what you mean when you refer to being 84 and 22 years old! Bottom line: If you were tested for HSV IgG (not IgM) antibodies and your index values are both high positives, then you are infected with both HSV types. Doesn't matter too much your age. Do you know your index values? A swab would have been better if you had any lesions to swab at the time.

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    • Posted

      Hi I'm also not sure how this works but I'm desperate for some kind of advice/opinions. I have never had any STD's, ever. I have been with my husband for 5 years and have been beyond faithful. Two kids later, (just gave birth 10 weeks ago) I have just been diagnosed with herpes . I went in for a pap and mentioned that I have been kind of itchy and burny down there, so I had assumed I had a yeast infection or bacterial or something. During pap she asks if my husband has been faithful? I said to my knowledge, I hope.. why?? Apparently I had a lesion on my cervix. She had swabbed it and sent me to the lab to get hsv igg igm testing done or whatever. I thought nothing of it. Ive always been clean, I'm married. Figured maybe the "lesion" she saw was from the rough sex we had about a week prior. Well she called me a few evenings ago and told me the lesion tested negative, she said she figured it would bc it looked like it was healing. BUT my blood work said i had herpes and my numbers showed it to be a recent infection??? How?? Why??? My husband swears he has not stepped out. He said maybe he had it before we got together and didn't know it bc he's never had symptoms. But if that were the case wouldn't my blood work show that it's an existing infection?? I asked my doctor, could I have had this for years but it's just now happening?? She said no bc my blood showed recent. So I am broken and extremely confused. Is it possible that he had it and just didn't pass it until 5 years later?? I'm praying it's possible. can the tests be wrong?? I just don't understand and I don't know what to do. Please help

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    • Posted

      If the blood test was for IgM, then disregard the results. That is an unreliable and generally worthless test for herpes, not recommended by the CDC. The test you should have had done is IgG, and your husband can have that same test done, too. However, since your swab came back negative, it seems unlikely you have herpes. Double check the blood test that you had done.
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    • Posted

      They also did the IgG test I can't remember the numbers.. but they were confident it was a new exposure. I'm hoping that's wrong. Do you think it'd be possible for him to have had it prior to our relationship, and I just hadn't contracted it for five years? I still can't come to grits with any of this nor can I even slightly understand it

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    • Posted

      Or maybe the tests invalid all together and I don't have it, is that possible?? I mean, besides the itching and burning I hadn't had any "outbreaks" or symptoms. And before my labs came back they had said I had a bacterial infection. I just don't get it or see how it's possible for me to have it. I hope he didn't cheat on me I trust that he didn't but it's making me think it's the only logical explanation.. unless like i said maybe he had it before us and didn't know it.. and I'm somehow just now contracting it five years later??

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    • Posted

      The only way to confirm a new infection, besides a recent negative baseline test, is to have a positive swab and negative IgG result, as this would mean you have herpes, but not yet the antibodies (takes several weeks to a few months after infection to reach detectable levels). You had a negative swab, and I don't know your IgG scores. If they are saying it's recent due to your IgM result, which is a common misconception, then they are wrong. The recurrent nature of herpes renders IgM testing worthless.

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    • Posted

      I really appreciate your fast responses. I'll have to call tomorrow and get my numbers again and try to ask them more questions as well, the discussion is so blurred it just seemed and still seems unreal!

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    • Posted

      I called and they said swab was negative and lesion looked to be healing, IgG was 0.47 and IgM 1.51 they said they are positive it is new infection
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    • Posted

      I need advice

      My husband and I have been married for 3.5 yrs. I have 4 kids not his and we r struggling to stay together for many reasons. I worry he has cheated bc we didn't have sex for 3 wks and maybe once a wk before that. Used to b almost daily. Well this last time we did oral and had sex . The next night I had one blister in my mouth. Thought nothing of it but then the next day I had 5. Maybe allergic reaction so I didn't go to the doc till today. 4 days later. I have maybe 8 blisters in my upper bottom lip area and tongue. The doc said it looks like herpes and is testing via a swab. She said if it's type 1 I had it in my body prob. But if it's type 2 it's a std and when I asked if it meant my husband cheated she seemed to avoid the question but eventually told me I have had negative paps till now and this is somthing new my body was exposed to so he might have but to have him get tested once my results come back. I feel torn. If he cheated I'm done. I'm close to it anyway but if he didn't I don't want to jump the gun. So how would I have gotten this? It's been 4.5 yrs since my last partner. And I have had clean paps yearly since then. Advice please!

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    • Posted

      Wait for the swab results first. Fyi, Pap smears don't test for herpes, although they can look out for obvious makers if present. I have gHSV2 but still had a normal Pap saying "no evidence of herpes", lol. HSV2 does not prefer the mouth, so that is less likely. If it is, you would likely to have gotten it genitally as well. I am guessing it's HSV1, in which case loads of people carry it, often without symptoms. Could be from your husband or something you've carried. You can do the HSV IgG antibody test (not IgM) now for baseline purposes. That can indicate if it's something you've recently acquired or already had for 2-3+ months.

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    • Posted

      My concern and worry of it being type 2 is because I went down on him and then got this the next day. He is dark skin and so visually I don't c anything on him. I really hope he didn't cheat on me. He is already super defensive saying I better trust him that he didn't cheat. Thing is I haven't accused him.

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    • Posted

      It's not impossible, just less common. I'm assuming you kissed him on the mouth as well, so who knows which end you got it from, if you even have it! I would do the IgG test for baseline purposes now (or immediately after your swab results), so that you know where you stand HSV-wise. It takes anywhere between 1-3 months for HSV1&2 IgG antibodies to become detectable, so if you test asap, you'll know your status at the time of this incident.

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    • Posted

      Hi, I asked my doctor if she could find out how long Ive had HSV - 2 for? She said I could have had it for 5 years unknownly, I wounder if she said that cause i have a kid. i ended up in hospital a year after given birth with kidney issues and they tested for everything even for stds. They came back clear. I found out last year in march that I had hsv2. This was hard for me at the time I hadn't had sex since boxing day which would of been 3 months to a guy I was set up with and b4 him I was in a short realationship and they were the only guys i had been with since i had the all clear. This is the difficult part my doctor said their is no way to find out when and believes I could of had it in my system for longer. I don't get it. I don't know who gave this to me and I want to tell my ex's but how far back do I go? It's taken me this long to be ok with this as im taking meds to help with the outbreaks.I'm finally ready to open up and tell my ex's. I still don't think I'll get my answer of who gave it to me. I'm not angry by this anymore thou an answer would help ease my mind. I don't want to ruin some of my ex's relationships as I don't think half theses guys would get tested and blame me. I would love help on how to start this conversation. Thanks

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    • Posted

      Were you specifically tested for herpes IgG antibodies that time you were tested for most everything? Even if you were and tested negative then, it's impossible to know who gave it to you since that time, as your first outbreak did not occur within a week of sexual contact, which is what typically happens. It could have been either partner. Sorry that doesn't help!

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    • Posted

      Hello FelisCatus. I was reading some of your posts and you seemed knowledgeable. I know it is usually 3-6 months for an igg to show positive. However I have tested negative 4 times over a year not going over .1 for my results. The problem is that I have these red blemishes that a std clinic said were herpes last September. Is there a reason I wouldn't be testing positive? Thank you!

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    • Posted

      Thank you, I try to be!

      IgG is good at 3 months for most people, just fyi. As for why you are consistently negative, the most obvious answer is that you don't have herpes, but some other issue. Visual diagnoses are prone to error. Have you ever had it confirmed as herpes by swab test? If not, the next time you find a lesion, get it swabbed asap, preferably by pcr.

      The other possibility is that you have gHSV1 and are one of the 25% who fail to ever show up as positive on the HerpeSelect test (the HSV2 test does not have this issue). I'm assuming your IgG test is type-specific and for both HSV1&2 separately, and most likely HerpeSelect, but correct me if I'm wrong.

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    • Posted

      Hi FelisCatus, I too was looking over this post and thought I'd give messaging you a shot, since as previously stated you seem very knowledgeable. My story starts back in May, when I got full blood work done for STD testing. At the time, I assumed herpes would automatically be tested for, and I believe I even specifically asked for it. A couple weeks later, they call back and I tested positive for chlamydia. At the time, the only symptom I'd experienced from that was having a difficult time pushing all the urine out, sometimes I'd be on the toilet a good 15 minutes pushing out tiny amounts. So, I took the prescribed antibiotics, and went about my life. Side note, I've been married since last September, but he and I didn't have the usual dating experience beforehand, as in we met, dated briefly, didn't talk over a whole summer, spoke again that August, then got married. I know, sounds crazy, but it's working, haha. But that means that before we got married, I'd slept with a couple different people semi recent to that. He gets tested regularly being in the army, and never came back positive for anything, even after I did. Since I didn't get that from him, that means I'd carried at at least 8 months before finding out I had it and somehow didn't transmit it. Anywho, fast forward to this past July, I begin getting these tiny zit-like bumps spread out on both sides of my nose. They weren't pus filled, it looked exactly like any picture of perioral dermatitis. I used coconut oil and apple cider vinegar, but it didn't go away, or sometimes it would almost go away and then come back. Eventually, by September, it had left my nose and traveled to spots on both sides of my mouth, a few centimeters from my lips, but not on them at all, and was still fairly mild looking, with occasional flare ups. I kept using only natural products on my face. Then it was only on my right side. Soon, this particular spot got much worse, with a bunch of annoying little bumps that were more tender than painful. I started soaking the spot in Apple cider vinegar, which seemed to anger it. That's when I felt actual pain and stinging, and the spot turned very red. After this, the spot kept drying up and peeling, then would get red again. It looked and felt sort of like I'd burned the skin. This went on for a few more weeks. It hurt to talk and move my mouth, but it stayed in the same spot. Eventually, I began using a pure honey based mask directly on the spot, putting a bandaid over it, and leaving it overnight. I still used ACV, though, just because my theory was to kill whatever it was dead, haha, and I didn't care if it hurt. Meanwhile, the end of October, I go in to the doc to get retested for chlamydia (bear with me, I promise this story is going somewhere), because I'd been having mild urination problems, just like I'd had when I tested positive but much milder. Tests came back negative. So I decide to go see the doctor about the face rash, 100% convinced it was perioral dermatitis because even when it was agitated it looked exactly like it. Night before the appointment, I scrubbed Frank's Coffee Scrub hard on the area, causing it look super red, be painful, and just all around look worse than usual. The doc's theories, when she sees my face, is that it's herpes or impetigo. Since it looked nothing like either to me, I was confident that my blood work (they took 2 samples, by the way) would come back negative. Well, today I get a call back from a nurse. She says I tested positive for herpes, but they don't know if it's type 1 or type 2, so for whatever reason I have to wait 3 months to go back in for more accurate tests. Meanwhile the doc wants me on valtrex. What's strange to me is, once I got home from the doc 2 weeks ago when she first tested me, I continued to dab pure honey on that spot and use hyaluronic acid on my face. A tiny red spot had also jumped back up and was slightly higher than the big spot, but instead of bumps this spot immediately looked just like the agitated spot. Anywho, literally the next day after the appointment and after applying honey overnight, the spot almost cleared up. 4 days later, it was nearly invisible, and today there's a tiny tinge of pale pink where the 2nd spot jumped, but no other indicator that I even had anything on my face. So, my questions are, why do I have to wait 3 months to find out which herpes I have (I've known I have type 1 for a while, I've gotten cold sores since I was a small child) because I'm panicking at the idea of having type 2, and having to wait 3 months is going to mess me up in the head, and why didn't they know right away which type it was, since everyone else seems to be told right away? Also, what does it mean if my husband doesn't have anything? It's so strange that people can get it from sleeping with someone once, but then other people can carry it and not transmit it? Ugh. I initially had a huge breakdown and told my husband to just divorce me now. He said no, haha. But the more I read about it, the more confused I am as to why I'm still in the dark as to what's going on, and I'm still not 100% the thing on my face wasn't perioral dermatitis. Any advice or brilliance from you would be much, much appreciated! Thank you so much.

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    • Posted

      Lol, that's a lot of background! But what you had on your face does not sound like herpes, and if it comes back again, get it swabbed. Why they didn't swab you and did a blood test for herpes instead is beyond me. It also sounds like they did not do a type-specific blood test, which means it could have been the IgM antibody test that is not advised for herpes (not type-specific, inaccurate, etc.). Should instead be the IgG antibody test for herpes, which is nearly always type-specific. The fact you had cold sores as a child also means that a combined herpes test will be positive, since you have HSV1 orally.

      I do not feel this was herpes, but get it swab tested the next time if you're concerned. You may also wish to confirm the type of blood test they did, out of interest. Even if it was herpes, it would more likely be HSV1, which you already have, not HSV2, which does not usually like the mouth and rarely presents with symptoms. Hope that helps!

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    • Posted

      Thank you so much for such a speedy response! Haha, yes, sorry, a lot of backstory to this, just in case something that seemed unrelated ended up possibly being related. I was thinking about it, and when it went away rapidly a couple of weeks ago, that was when I stopped using my fluoride toothpaste, which I read can exacerbate perioral dermatitis. I stopped that completely and used the honey on it, and it went away in 4 days, when I'd had it for months. The right side of my mouth is also the side I got the most toothpaste on, just because I'm messy and brush with my right hand, haha. So I'm convincing myself that it was still perioral dermatitis on my face, because if it were an outbreak of herpes, I feel like it wouldn't have started out as tiny spread out dots next to my nose and cheeks, then moved to the sides of my mouth never touching my lips, then to one side only. And it only became irritated and red when I soaked it with apple cider vinegar. Plus, how would an outbreak last 5 months straight? In my mind right now, I've convinced myself that it just showed the type 1 that I already knew I had, and the outbreak on my face was just some skin irritation from toothpaste or something. I mean, I wouldn't have even gotten tested for herpes had she not eyeballed my face and called it herpes. But on the other hand, I'm paranoid that this is how I end up finding out I have type 2, haha. Paranoia aside, I no longer feel like throwing myself off the nearest building, and your response certainly helped with that! Haha, I keed, I keed. But I did have a mental break down up until this morning. Sigh. Who even calls someone and tells them, "you have herpes, but we don't know which type, and you have to wait 3 months to even find out, but it's up to you if you want to or not"? I'm going to try to get in to someone else ASAP to get type specific testing, for ease of mind or for more torture, I don't know. I stopped using honey and it didn't return, so I think that's good news. And my husband doesn't want to divorce and is certain it isn't type 2, so I think that's also good news, haha. Okay sorry again for the long rant, and again I appreciate your response immensely!

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    • Posted

      Good evening, in early November I had itching in the vaginal area.  I had just finished a 10 run of antibiotics for an accuse kidney infection.  I started the yeast ingestion regimen.  After completion of the yeast meds I. It iced pain when I pee.   A very horrible burning pain.  I looked with a mirror and only saw redness.  I thought it was razor burn.  Then the pain continued and when I looked again I saw blisters.  I had my boyfriend of 6 years take a photo, so I could zoom in.  I know gross! We both looked and he commented it looked like genital herpes!  I freaked!  All the worst thoughts ran through my head! Did her cheat!?!? I felt so dirty and just cried.  He assured me we would get through it.  

      I made a dr appointment with my gyno.  In the exam she noted a swab would not work as the sores were healing.  She performed a a blood test Igg and a full STD work up.  I tested positive for both HSV 1&2.  My boy friend also tested for both HSV 1/2 Igg was what we requested, and got his results today, positive for HSV 1 & negative for HSV2.  

      This is is good news for him.  That means I have had it...prior to my current boyfriend I was in a 10 year monogamous relationship.  This was my first out break ever.  My gyno said it could have been dormit for years.  Being so sick with a weekend immune system can trigger it.  

      Now im freaking cuz both my boyfriend and I have unprotected sex and have for the 6 years we have been together.  If I have had it this entire time why is my boyfriend clean?.   

      How do I know when I'm shedding?? I read that after the first outbreak there ane a lot.  My first outbreak I had two blisters at the opening of the vaginal area. Two on my rectum and 1 on the outside of my rectum.  All are healed with the exception of the one by the rectum.  I noticed on my inner right thigh  three pimple looking bumps.  I'm worried these are more of an outbreak.  I have used essential oils to heal, tea tree and clove oil.  These both have helped with the discomfort.  It has been three weeks.  We have not had any sex.  I'm scare to give it to him know.... what next.

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    • Posted

      If your IgG for HSV2 was already a high positive at or around the time of your outbreak, then, yes, this is not a new infection. The most infectious period is the first year of infection and during outbreaks generally, but carriers can be infectious without symptoms at other times, too. Since you were likely infected years ago and your bf appears to be negative even after 6 years, then you are presumably not a very high shedder and/or he possesses some natural resistance of sorts (probably a bit of both).

      Just make sure you are fully healed up before sex, avoid sex during future outbreaks (or wherever you don't feel fully normal down there), and be careful should you fall ill again with whatever. Sickness can be a trigger, and your kidney infection could well be what caused you to have your first recognised outbreak. If you are truly worried, use condoms and consider daily suppressive therapy, but if your bf understands the risks and is okay without either or both, then it is up to you both how you wish to proceed.

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    • Posted

      thanks for the quick reply.  We are both new to this. There is a lot of misleading info around the topic.  He does not want to get this either.  When you say the first year is the most contagious, does that mean 12 months from the first outbreak?  Was the description on my outbreak considered a bad outbreak?  Is shedding done before an outbreak occurs?  Can u feel the symptoms of shedding?  

      I have gotton coldsores my entire life an feel when one is going to come on.  Is it the same with HVS2?

      you mentioned suppression treatment, is that the meds from a dr? 

      Appologies for for all the questions...

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    • Posted

      No, I mean 12 months from infection, which might have been years ago in your case. What were your IgG scores, by the way? Your first outbreak sounds similar to many others on here, but it makes no real difference.

      Shedding typically occurs before and during an outbreak until fully healed, plus at other random times without an outbreak or any noticeable symptoms (so, no, you wouldn't necessarily know or feel it). Even oral HSV1 can shed asymptomatically without a cold sore present, just fyi.

      Daily suppressive therapy with acyclovir or valacyclovir requires a prescription, but the odds of your bf getting it after 6 years of remaining negative are likely lower (but not zero). Most new infections occur within the first three months of a relationship, and the longer a person remains negative with a positive partner, the less likely they will contract it (although it can still certainly happen).

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    • Posted

      Thanks, I have to. All and get the IgG results this morning. My hsv1 was at 28.2 and the hsv2 was 8.4 I guess this is high but not as high as the hsv1. Like that matters... I still have it. My boyfriend IgG for hsv1 was 3.2 and for HSV2 0.2.

      In speaking with my gyno I am most contagious the first 12 months after the first outbreak. This as you noted, I will likely have more outbreaks in the first 12 months from my initial outbreak. It appears that if all sores are healed that is the time you are not contagious.

      I asked what test STDs are checked when pregnant at I have three children, but the HSV is not checked. HIV, gonaria, clamidia are all checked. So I can not narrow it down by this.

      Anyhow... it still sucks

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    • Posted

      That does appear to be a clear positive for HSV2, unfortunately. The HerpeSelect IgG is never as high as for HSV1 for some reason. Some corrections, however.

      You were more infectious 12 months from time of initial infection, not first outbreak, as that is when the virus was still new to your body and you were developing antibodies, etc. (same as for other diseases).

      No outbreak only means you are less likely to be infectious, not non-infectious, as gHSV2 often randomly sheds from the anogenital tract without any symptoms and is transmissible at such times (most new infections are actually acquired during such periods of asymptomatic shedding), although your bf seems fine for the possible reasons noted previously.

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    • Posted

      Hi there again, I just got over my initial outbreak, how soon could a recurrence outbreak take place? I have been having some itching and am freaking out.
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    • Posted

      Itching could just be an after effect of your first outbreak. Recurrences can be any time. Hard to say when. But if you never had an outbreak before falling ill, then perhaps you won't have another unless you fall ill again.

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    • Posted

      I have been reading about peeps who have outbreaks every two weeks? Seeing that I am new to this not sure what is real or not. My first out break started as my menstral cycle commenced also. It was like a perfect storm of being ill.

      I have also read the outbreaks are caused around a menstral cycle and after sex? I really don't want to experience these anymore... my first out break lasted for a little over 3.5 weeks, actually all of November with the sores healed by roughly three days ago. It seems like a long time. So obviously to have a consecutive out break has me concerned? It there typically itching after? I recall the itching and burning in the beginning also?

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    • Posted

      First of all, recurrences for most people are nothing like the first outbreak. Usually just a single lesion or two, no painful urination, no systemic symptoms like fever and malaise, and all gone within a week. I have had several recurrences now, and I can personally attest to that. I barely know it's there except when wiping, etc.

      Second, I bet you may not get too many recurrences, since you never had any outbreaks before you were ill. Outbreaks every two weeks is not the norm for most people, and I would be suspicious of such claims (like, is it even definitely herpes that's causing problems so frequently?).

      If unprovoked, I doubt you will have a second outbreak so soon after. You might (or might not) in a month or two, but not normally straight after healing. Topical acyclovir cream really helps with healing, I've found (but does not reduce shedding or transmission).

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    • Posted

      My boyfriend wants to be intimate with protection. What about oral. If he does not wear a condom will he get it? I'm allergic to latex and all the info says a latex condoms will reduce risks.

      Can we use synthetic?

      I'm not ready though still trying to absorb all of this. I feel like it is has changed everything.

      Prior to this we had relations 5-5 times a week not kidding, very active. Now I feel tainted

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    • Posted

      But you are no different to before, except your kidney infection triggered your first (and possibly only) outbreak, so of course now you are aware of your status. Try to think of it like that. I believe any synthetic condom should be fine, so long as it isn't one of those natural ones that are porous.

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    • Posted

      I was tested for every STD at that time. I've become used to it now. Hardest part is getting into contract with those I had slept with even if it was protected. Some won't contact back and I don't want to leave a paper or voice trail. I had an idea who may have given them to me. Thanks to everyone that has opened up.

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    • Posted

      I want to know if a person knows they have only had one sexual partner and they tested positive for hsv2 and yet the other partner says they have no signs of being infected. Can they be the carrier of hsv2?
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    • Posted

      Hi if I've tested positive for herpes 2 as I had sores on my genitals through a Swab culture test does this mean it's recent exposure or past?

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    • Posted

      Of course. If a person has the virus, they will have the IgG antibodies for it and test positive, provided the test is done after 3 months, and subject to the accuracy/reliability of the test kit used.
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    • Posted

      It just means you have an established infection (not brand new) and that your body mounted a strong immune response. HSV1 tends to produce much higher sores on the test, I've noticed. It doesn't mean anything else. I have quizzed an HSV expert on another forum and been told it means nothing other than what I just said above. Seems hard to believe, but that's apparently the case. It has no bearing on outbreaks, infectiousness, prognosis, nothing.

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    • Posted

      A brand new infection would still be negative for IgG antibodies. A recent infection would be low and subsequent tests would show a significant upwards trend. "Old" can mean anything over 3 months to many years, but if you've had no suspicious outbreak-like symptoms of late, it's probably pretty long-standing. No other way to narrow it down.

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    • Posted

      They can be that high even after many years, and 3 months is just a rough timeframe. Some people seroconvert earlier. If you didn't have an outbreak soon after exposure, you can't prove anything with your IgG at only 9-10 weeks. Fyi, I tested for HSV2 at 4 months post exposure and was practically off the charts (different test kit). It's still pretty high well over a year late.

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    • Posted

      Yes, that's possible. Many people have HSV1, in fact, usually orally and without any symptoms. I had an outbreak, so knew to get swabbed, blood tested, the works.

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    • Posted

      I recently found out that I tested positive for hsv2 she to a lesion being swabbed and blood being draw, but 2 months ago I tested negative. How is it possible it changed so fast? How do I go by mentally accepting this?
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    • Posted

      If you tested positive by swab, you are infected and a carrier, as it is rare for the swab to be wrong when positive. I would question the negative test. What type of test was it? If blood, which type of blood test?
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    • Posted

      I had a swab done and the bag 1 and 2 with igm and igg. The doctor just said that I tested positive and everything else was negative.
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    • Posted

      Apologies. Think I misunderstood. You were negative for herpes two months ago, but are positive for HSV2 now? That means you were recently infected, not long before you developed your first lesion(s). It is hard to accept and distressing, I know, but once you do accept that you have it and move on, it becomes easier to deal with, both emotionally and physically.
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    • Posted

      So I've been with the same person for two years, did this come from him because he has no symptoms at all. He has not been tested but is going. The lesion is the only symptom I have results came back within 3 days.

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    • Posted

      Changed name but I keep. Having breakdowns like how am I suppose to accept this it is really driving me crazy.
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    • Posted

      So I've been with the same person for two years, did this come from him because he has no symptoms at all. He has not been tested but is going. The lesion is the only symptom I have results came back within 3 days.

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    • Posted

      If you tested negative by IgG two months ago and have not had any sexual contact outside of your relationship, then your recent outbreak that tested positive by swab is new and could only come from your current bf. Were you also tested for IgG at the time of your outbreak? Ignore IgM, as it is unreliable and inaccurate. Carriers can be asymptomatic. Based on what you've said, your bf ought to test positive for HSV2 IgG (again, forget IgM).

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    • Posted

      Yea both and the swab I don't have the physical paper results but i think they all 3 came back positive. I am in the middle of outbreak. Going away and on meds at the moment. I had a 2 swabs of same type done I guess to double test. All the doctor said was sorry but test positive.

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    • Posted

      This is where I'm a little confused, and it may be because you don't have your lab report to check against, but this would appear to be a newly acquired infection for you, so your latest IgG (if done at the same time as your current/first outbreak) should still be negative. Only the swab should be positive for now. A month or more later, you'd expect the IgG to turn positive. You might want to ask for a copy of your results.

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    • Posted

      Ok I have question. Last week my dr said I have herpes simplex 1 virus but I've been faithful to my partner we been together for two years daughter was born March 2016 and I was tested for everything came back negative .  Well I had outbreak outside vagina and when I went to the doctor two weeks ago when my tests came back positive last week. He said he has never cheated and he got blood tested came back negative and swab test negative. But I haven't gotten blood test yet . So how could I have it if I've been negative  and all of sudden I had a outbreak doctor said I had to of gotten it recent I am lost and confused . I don't know if he asked them to take his blood for that exact test because my doctors don't test for it through blood unless you ask 

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    • Posted

      It depends on the type of blood test (some less reliable than others), plus the blood tests for HSV1 generally aren't as good. The HerpeSelect kit, at least, supposedly misses 1 in 4 positives. Fyi, IgG is the better blood test to do, not IgM (not advised for herpes testing).

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    • Posted

      I got tested last week and my results can back positive for Hsv1 & 2 both IGG . Type1 was <0.90 negative

      Type2 was >1.09 positive

      Are these recent infections or have i had them for years...

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    • Posted

      Equivocal means indeterminate, so basically your HSV2 result is unsure. I suppose you can retest for IgG again to see whether there are any changes in your status.
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    • Posted

      You can. Up to you. Some people just test equivocal for some reason. If that continues to happen, the only way to know for sure is to order the much more expensive University of Washington western blot test for herpes, which should hopefully give a clear yes or no answer. But try another IgG test first.
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    • Posted

      Ok thanks...i just so frustrated I just don't understand none of this I haven't had any breakouts I only got tested just to make sure just to actually know so I will re-test

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    • Posted

      You're probably negative, but for some reason you test equivocal on the IgG test. Hopefully a second test will give more clarity. Let me know how that goes, and good luck!

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    • Posted

      I just was told I tested positive for hsv bc my igm came back at 1.34al but my igg was negative at .02 my husband swears he has never cheated but if igm is a recent antibody test what other option is there?
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    • Posted

      It's not a recent antibody test for herpes. Recurrences can also protrude IgM. Secondly, it's very unreliable and probe to false positives. The CDC and ASHA even say not to use it for herpes testing. It's IgG only, forget IgM.

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    • Posted

      I also had mono in my early 20s and read that that could also produce a false positive due to the antibodies being in my system 
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    • Posted

      If your IgG is negative and you've had no risky encounter in the past 3 months, then you're fine. It's possible mono threw off the IgM, as mono is a herpes family virus. Ultimately, the IgM test is just rather rubbish generally.

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    • Posted

      Hi. I need your help!!

      So confused. So much conflicting info. So sorry im jumping into diff question but dont know how to message you directly. If this is not the way-pls let me know how to.

      Question: my bf of 1 and half years got cold sore near his lower lip last week after giving me oral sex. I havent had synptoms or had any reason to get tested til now. Cold sore slowly went away, however, he now has genital sores painful raised bumps. He's sure there is no way this is a coincidence and he's convinced i gave him herpes. We have always used a condom. I haven't been with anyone since i'm with him and he says he hasnt either. I went for testing this morning. Sorry - here's the question- is it possible for me to test negative if he has it?? Is it possible he had it from years ago and lay dormant til now and nothing to do with me or fact that cold sore happened morning after he was exposed orally is too much of a coincidence?

      Also- if he tests- can he at least figure out when he contracted it?

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    • Posted

      He needs to get swabbed for herpes asap while the bumps are still fresh. At the same time, he should do the type specific HSV IgG tests (no later than a month after the bumps, and not IgM). If the swab is positive and the IgG negative, that is proof it is a new infection. If his IgG is already positive within a month, it is an existing infection. Once you pass this narrow testing window, it is impossible to tell. You should also do the same IgG test as him at or around the same time. You will either be negative or an existing carrier. And, yes, you can be negative while he isn't. Depends on who has it and who doesn't, if indeed it is even herpes in the first place.

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    • Posted

      I have been married over 30 years and never strayed. I started with what I thought was a yeast/ uti a week ago. My Dr told me today it was herpes and did a swab. Can herpes stay dormant over 30 years with no breakouts?
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    • Posted

      FelizCastus. Seems your the go to person on the forum. So help me wrap this around my head. 12 years ago I was with a man who had something on his lip an than we had oral. We were young and stupid and didn't know much about diseases. Anyways shortly after him going down on me I had a reaction. I looked up pictures of herpes and thought the worse. I had several red bumps and it was very irritating. So I went to my local hospital and told them what happened. Now what I can't remember is if they just looked at me and confirmed it without testing or if they did a down on the bumps. I'm sure it would be on my file with my doctor so I will have to ask. What I'm getting at is uve been with a same sex woman for over 9 years and she never got anything. We've had full skin to skin contact many times and she never had a reaction. So do I not even have herpes. I've also been with another woman and same thing they didn't have a reaction either and it wasn't just one time with skin to skin contact . So until recently when I forgot to mention to my sex partner about my herpes did I start rethinking it. This new partner we only had oral contact tho. She's freaking cause I never told her and I get that. But maybe I've been thinking if with the other two woman I was with if they never caught it maybe I don't have it. So I went back to the original guy I slept with and asked did he have herpes. He's been with other woman since and even they didn't get it. He continued to tell me that the lip thing he had was impetigo.. So was I misdiagnosed. I go see my doctor soon to see what it says on my file cause I just don't remember. As for not telling my recent partner trust me it eats me up every day and it's been a week. It's not like me to do that. It was a mistake and she can't look past that. It's something u just don't keep from someone. We never had the talk beforehand about whether we were clean or not cause really who does am I to be blamed of course. Will she get over it prob not so I lost something good that was making me happy cause maybe now all these years later I never really had it. So I'm getting my levels retested to see. I never had an outbreak or reaction since that time with the guy nothing makes sense now that I relive it. She won't get past the initial fact I never brought it up and it will hurt forever cause I am a good person. Even if my test comes back negative. That time I reacted could have been to his impetigo and I hear it looks the same and is misdiagnosed. Often. Anyways hope u can enlighten me. Or not. But I needed someone to hear this! .

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    • Posted

      Abt 1 month Before my current bf i was being a littke reckless sexually, well not in a crazy way but i had unprotected sex. Almost a year ago i went to the doctor because i saw a snall sore...the doctor swabbed it and said it was just friction from shaving. I got with my now boyfriend in October of 2017 and we would use protection off and on. In april of 2018 i went to do a pap smear and routine std testing, everything came back negative except for trich. I took antibiotics and retested many times up until june 2018 and all came back negative which is confusing because my bf is my same partner and we had unprotected sex again so idk how when i retested i came negative. Fast forwRd on one event of restesting i did a home std full panel. I tested positive for hsv 2. Shocked... i never had any signs or symptoms and i did not kno that hsv testing was only provided when asked. My index value is 2.85 im not too sure what that means but i am worried. and only these past 2wks have i experienced tingling and frequent urination but no blisters. My last hsv test was in 2013 and it was negative so it had to be passed to me in these last 5yrs but idk when and from whom. What should i do? Why am i just now tingling? And should i retest? How can i find out when i got it? My bf gave me unprotected oral last week and if he has it wouldnt he have symptoms by now? 
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    • Posted

      Hello FelizCastus,

      I hope your still reading and replying to this thread. I need help. Just yesterday I had sex with a woman who informed me via text message this morning that she has HSV2. I am scared beyond measure. We did use protection but I did give her oral and she bled on the condom and there was a little blood on the base of my penis. She told me this morning that the only way I'd have it is if she had an outbreak and she says she hasn't had an outbreak in 8 years. She also says she takes the meds daily and have done so for the past 8 years. I want to know for myself but don't know what to do or where to go....please help!

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