Why I am so depressed, is it getting worse?

Posted , 6 users are following.

Hi I am a 17 year old teenager and It feels like I am stuck in time. I can't shake this. My depression is getting worse. I didn't go to school the other day because I simply woke up with the worst feeling ever. I feel like there is no point to life anymore. I have lost all of my friends. All I have left is my boyfriend. I don't want too lose him because of my depression. I recently started a new job at a nursing home and they have me working full time AND I have school. I feel like this shadow is stuck over me and like there is no point to live. No I am not suicidal but, I'm tired of doing the same routine everyday, I am tired of waking up. I keep having major mood swings and everytime I try to tell my mom about my depression she makes a joke out of it and does not take it seriously. I don't know what much else there is too do. I feel like I'm running out of options. I feel like I don't want to do this anymore. It's like a constant fight with myself everyday. I hate it. This is not the person I should be and this is not who I used too be. I want me back and it feels as if a black hole has swept me away and now I am left here lost and trying to figure out who I am. I feel like it am doing something wrong in life and I don't know what....why can't I just be happy. I don't even have motivation too wake up in the morning and go to school. I am scaring myself. I am embarrassed and scared of the future and I just need help please....

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  • Posted

    So Bowling....You're telling me your mother just lets you stay home from school and she is making a joke out of what you are trying to tell her. Something is very wrong with this picture. How long has this been supposedly happening? Well, if what you are telling me is true, I would seek out a school counselor or teacher that you can trust. Preferably a female. If that avenue is not there, maybe go to your Principal of your school. Is there an older Aunt or cousin you can trust? I don't know Bowling, that's a tough one to call if you are saying your mother is making a joke out of it. I assume your Father is out of the picture huh? You have to get some help and professional at that too. As far as your Mother, shame on her. Do not put this off. GET HELP. But just be careful from whom you choose it. That's all I can say for now. I also would keep posting and updating here what you are doing. Good Luck and take care.
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  • Posted

    Yes my father is part of the problem why I think I have depression and he won't talk too me and all I have is my mother but I can't talk to her because she makes a joke out of it, I'm too scared too talk to anyone the only person I talk too is my boyfriend and I also tell my thoughts on here. My bf tells me I should go talk to a counselor but I am too scared and embarrassed.
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  • Posted

    She's still a minor, she will probably need her mother.That's why I thought a figure of authority talk to her mother. But maybe not. Anyone have the specifics on that?
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  • Posted

    I thought 16 was cut off point for minor/ adult at doctors? I know I went at 16 without parents present but things might have changed? Also I'm not recommending keeping it a secret, but maybe it's a step to take?
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  • Posted

    Yeah, she might be under some kind of insurance or health care. I guess it wouldn't hurt to try. Bowling, call your doctor and see if you can make an appointment with him/her. OK? What do you think ali?
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  • Posted

    I think yes, try to make an appointment. I've just done a search on age/ minor limits but didn't get any definitive answer! Also bowling, be as honest ad you can- I learnt that even though I thought my problems were a waste of their time, they are trained to see things we don't, and they have seen everything so really do tell them sll, they will not judge but they can help
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  • Posted

    Excuse my typos. Bowling, you have my love and support. Not everyone accepts meds/ doctors help, I am of the belief that if it halts the desperate feelings then it has worked for the good. not a cure, but a step in the right directionxxx
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  • Posted

    Well my boyfriend is 21 so I was wondering could he take me too the doctors too get help? Without my mom knowing? And thank you too everyone that is showing a concern this site helps me too realize that I am not alone and that I have support. I will deffinelty keep you guys updated.
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  • Posted

    Ah sweetheart I'm an idiot, just realised your from US so maybe you have different cut off points for confidentiality. I still recommend trying an appointment with your GP, surely they cannot refuse you when you really need it? If the age thing is a problem and you don't want to tell you mum, and trust your boyfriend, then yes make the appointment in his name. I am saying this advice for the first step! If you live with your mum, at done point it will be helpful to let her know the score, BUT only if you feel comfortable doing so. Just make sure you talk to people who will support you mo matter what, then you will have the support network needed if you tell your mum what's going on xxx
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  • Posted

    My mom won't understandsad I've tried but she just makes it a joke, so all I have is my boyfriend, it's just very very hard I'm losing sleep at night because I have so many thoughts running through my head and I keep having bad dreams everytime I sleep.
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  • Posted

    Ok so sweetheart you need to do it on your own. I know nothing bout US healthcare costs so I'm not pretending its easy but you have to get someone to listen to you as your own person, as you obvs not close enough to your mum to share. And you shouldn't have to be, you are 17 which is plenty old enough to seek help yourself. Again, I am naive to the US system, but even of it takes you to the A and E department they will have to listen to you as your own person. You are presenting to me as an acute case who needs immediate relief ( if just from the insomnia), bit really Bowling you have to look after yourself now, maybe be selfish, do what it takes to get yourself seen. Xx
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  • Posted

    Thank you so much for all of this supportsmile I think as soon as I get my first paycheck from my new job I'll use it too seek helpsmile
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