Why now - relatives from abroad are coming!!! What would you do?

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Here I am getting myself in the 'zone' to have this operation and as we know it is bad enough 'going for it'.

I put off this surgery for 8 years, due to Breast Cancer, now trying to think positive picking up from where I left off.  Now I don't know whether to postpone this long awaited surgery which I am told should be a date in July.

My husband's relatives are coming over from Cananda!  It has been announced that they will stay with us for a week and have two children 5 & 8!  What annoys me is my OH does all the talking and my op has not been mentioned and I know it is because he wants them here, naturaly, and says we will manage. (he says when he went to Canada they were so good to him and he should return their hospitatilty - which I can understand - trust the timing to be against me. (feeling sorry for myself now)

Reading all your posts and with a date coming up in July - what would you do?  I have said to my husband I could postpone it to after they have been e.g. ask for September time and he announced but my sister, her daughter and her little girl could be coming then!  

I thought why is this happening after all these years - just when I want to sit in my own mess and get over this op.  So I will be 70 in July - I am afraid if I put it off for this year will I put it off for ever.

I would love to be able to get this operation over without staying guests.  OH said they can look after themselves and I think ' This is turning my home into a self catering cottage with me in the middle wanting to be in my own misery, pain and pyjamas.

OK - that's my moan over - it's good to talk. x

2 likes, 20 replies


20 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Gilly. It seems to me this is less about your operation (you seem to know what that will entail) than your relationship with your OH as you call him. If you have been clear with him and communicated the fact that for a minimum of 2 weeks you won't be able to do anything and will need constant help from him, and if he then still wants to have the visitors then just lie back anything!! 
    • Posted

      Oops I am a newbie. Pressed post by mistake!!  Meant to type lie back and don't do anything!
  • Posted

    Thank you all - will look in again later in week.  Very sad news my brother's partner died on Friday afternoon so he needed support and tough times ahead.  
  • Posted


    i had a bilateral on 27/11/14 and managnedj to have a very demanding mother in law for 10 days over Christmas with a full house over the new year. All the company, and the gossip certainly made the op a blip, and put my mind onto other things,rather me, and when it was all over -what a treat.

    it was also tempting to murder the husband though, still very tempting after he's put me through a week walking in the Brecons......

    caroline xx


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