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Can't stop drinking

Posted , 33 users are following.

YLT
YLT

Hi. I've been drinking since I was 14. I'm now 39. For most of that time I've been a binge drinker. Often, like 2 or 3 times a month, drinking till I can't remember how I got home or what I was saying or doing. Now I drink most nights. Not loads every night but I do think about drinking  most days and look forward to the next time I can get melted.

Recently it's been affecting my relationship. My girlfriend has warned me that my drinking could be the end of our relationship. I love her more than anything but still I can't stop drinking. Sometimes I lie about what I've drunk or I hide empty bottles from her. I've  promised myself I'll cut down or I'll just have a couple instead of loads, but it never works.

I think it's now the time to stop all together but I'm not sure I can. I have a lot of good friends but socialising with them usually involves a night in the pub and I don't think I could do that without getting drunk.

I've also been trying to stop smoking for about 10 years and haven't really managed that either! I think I have an addictive personality and not sure what to try next. 

13 likes, 95 replies

95 Replies

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  • al5aph49
    al5aph49 YLT

    Posted

    hiYLT  i am recovering from alchol i told all them lies , i was hiding empty bottles all over my home,(even though i live by myself) it is a case of if you cant see them, you havn't drank them, i made so many promises i knew i was not going to keep, in my eyes you must seek medical help, and tell your doctor the TRUTH,before your partner gives up on you, because that will give you another reoson to drink'forget about giving up smoking for now (this WILL,kill you first)try changing your social life do other things rather than go to the pub, show your girifriend how much you love her by trying as hard as you can,

    i wish you realy good luck and i hope and pray you will be one of the lucky ones like myself 

    • hope4cure
      hope4cure al5aph49

      Posted

      Ohhh.. The ugly side of addiction.. Good support ..

      thanks for sharing!

       

  • matthew7979
    matthew7979 YLT

    Posted

    I also just realized this the other day. I don't know why it has brought me so much comfort but for some reason it has. Maybe because it's a goal?  Maybe because it's simplicity at its best but for the rest of my life I'll be thinking, "not one more drink"  I've come to the conclusion that I'll never get over binge drinking so I need to stop altogether. So that motto "not one more drink"runs through my head. Whatever it takes is my opinion. 
    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 hope4cure

      Posted

      About a month ago, 20 days or so. It will be an experience I will never really relate fully to people. I was talking to someone when they berated me for not going to AA. I think AA is a great place that helps people, but I'm not one of those people. I need to be able to forgive myself for the past and continue onward. It will be an ongoing project. I'd love to write a blog about my experiences called Sobriety: one man's great adventure into the unknown. Of course I don't know how to blog lol...
    • hope4cure
      hope4cure matthew7979

      Posted

      Hi Matt .

      All the things that u state in UR post is what every alcoholic really wants.. That is exactly what AA teaches. Many techniques to reach each goal u set for urself...

      How to forgive urself ask for forgiveness from others. Many ways to help u Heal.

      I see it as using another excuse not to seek AA because u have been berated For not going to a meeting. I wonder how many were berated and went anyway and have been sober for many years...someone made u feel bad hurt UR feelings is another way the cravings can sabatoge the brain of an alcoholic from achieving sobriety. U cannot do this by urself, my son thought the same way it undermines UR very foal to take that first step to find sobriety.

      If u could read a book highly recommended by many doctors...IT A WAY TO HELP U .. The book is called, "Understanding The Alcoholic's Mind".The nature of cravings and how to control it. By Arnold Ludwig, MD

      another good book written a true story of a alcoholic.."Born Broken". both EBooks ..

      Thiese books may give u some insight to helping u find sobriety. Writing UR blogs etc. There r many blogs online written by those struggling with sobriety. Google them they r useful in many ways...

      PEACE

      HOPE

       

    • YLT
      YLT matthew7979

      Posted

      Not had a drink for 4 days. Doesn't sound like much but feels like a small achievement. I really like Matt's thought of 'not one more drink'. I was in the supermarket last night and was really tempted to buy a bottle of wine but the 'not one more drink' thought was running through my mind and I bought lime cordial and soda water instead!
    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 YLT

      Posted

      Nice...  great job on four days. The thing is four days is a long time if you've never done it before. Be proud...  I totally know what you mean about the supermarket. The new thing at the store across the street from my house is that they sometimes give out free samples of booze. They'll be someone back there with these small paper cups (shot size) and you can sample whatever they're pushing. Talk about having to give that section a wide berth lol. Today is day 23 for me. All I know is that it's a good day and that I'm sober. Another day of not one more drink...
    • al5aph49
      al5aph49 matthew7979

      Posted

      GOOD ON YOU that is realy good news hang on in there kid

       

    • al5aph49
      al5aph49 YLT

      Posted

      well done YLT one small step is one giant leap
    • hope4cure
      hope4cure YLT

      Posted

      Matt is full of helpfull surprises.. It's also a great step u have taken to accept that as UR chant to remind u not to! I am nery hopeful for u to succeed...

      one drink at a time is the best anyone can do. 

       

    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 hope4cure

      Posted

      Thank you. I also have to say being able to talk on this site and just share helps tremendously also. I've just seen many things a bit different recently. I feel if I can just keep up the not one more drink, everything else eventually will become clear. I still have a long way to go obviously. I still do not feel comfortable going out at night yet so I've been a bit of a shut in, but it's all for a great cause...  me...  Thank you to everyone very much!
    • hope4cure
      hope4cure matthew7979

      Posted

      Matt I have a lot od confidence in u. UR intentions come from UR inner thoughts. U know the dark pain if not one more drink begins to slide...

      do u have support some one to help u?

      ur in my prayers I have great HOPE 4 U that this is the next day of the best day of UR life sober.. With many more in UR journey ahead.

      {{{ hugs }}}

      a bucket load of support I'm with u all the way. Never doubt ur or my tenacity 

      to stick with the chant....not one more drink... Beautiful !

    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 hope4cure

      Posted

      I have a friend who is also trying to be sober. I don't know if his is a long term plan but everyone has to go their own way. I'm just feeling really determined and honestly support comes from me. I have a few friends I've told and there behind me and support me but it's me who has to shave every day. 
    • al5aph49
      al5aph49 matthew7979

      Posted

      hi mathew  just bear in mind it matters not how many times you fall on the way what does matter is how many times you pick yourself up

      good luck mate 

    • hope4cure
      hope4cure matthew7979

      Posted

      UR outlook to stay sober is refreshing. U use no excuses..it UR face u see in the mirror every day..

      leu UR attitude.. Great job...

    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 hope4cure

      Posted

      I really have no other choice. I either succeed or do this all the way, or I lose everything I've worked for in my life. I really would love to date also but now have no idea on how to go about this. I just hope to make myself proud. 
    • hope4cure
      hope4cure matthew7979

      Posted

      This is not a good time to date.. It is usually a trigger.

      Take the time to live w/o any one.. 9- 12 months.. It's good advice for anyone. Coming off addiction... Healing takes time let go of all the stuff that keeps u back.. Even coming off relationships.. Divorce.. Always take time to heal UR self first or u will take all of the baggage with u to the next relationship..setting urself up for failure.. U have come so far remember UR motto., "Not one more drink". 

      Ur always in my prayers.....

      {{{{{HUGS}}}}

      HOPE

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