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Can't stop drinking

Posted , 33 users are following.

YLT
YLT

Hi. I've been drinking since I was 14. I'm now 39. For most of that time I've been a binge drinker. Often, like 2 or 3 times a month, drinking till I can't remember how I got home or what I was saying or doing. Now I drink most nights. Not loads every night but I do think about drinking  most days and look forward to the next time I can get melted.

Recently it's been affecting my relationship. My girlfriend has warned me that my drinking could be the end of our relationship. I love her more than anything but still I can't stop drinking. Sometimes I lie about what I've drunk or I hide empty bottles from her. I've  promised myself I'll cut down or I'll just have a couple instead of loads, but it never works.

I think it's now the time to stop all together but I'm not sure I can. I have a lot of good friends but socialising with them usually involves a night in the pub and I don't think I could do that without getting drunk.

I've also been trying to stop smoking for about 10 years and haven't really managed that either! I think I have an addictive personality and not sure what to try next. 

13 likes, 95 replies

95 Replies

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  • al5aph49
    al5aph49 YLT

    Posted

    mathew7979 you have done well at 20 days ,it is a start, try to think of it as a journey of adventure to a new life, you have got so much to gain, and a lot more to lose

    i wish you so much luck, keep up the good work 

    • hope4cure
      hope4cure al5aph49

      Posted

      Well said...AL UR a great source of support..LIKE THE DOGS IN MY PIC..this breed is compulsive with chasing .... Senerio for Chasing sobriety...it always falls into a whole..picking urself up is key...

      MATT IS SO LUCKY TO HAVE YOU !

      PEACE LUV & LAUGHTER

      {{hugs}}

      HOPE

  • YLT
    YLT

    Posted

    Hi all. So I managed to get through the weekend without a drink. First time I've done that in maybe 6 months. My girlfriend didn't speak to me for 4 days after my last bender last week but we had a long talk last night and I told her I now realise I have a problem and I really want to do something about it before I mess everything up for good. She's supportive but if I go off the rails again it could well be the end of us.

    I feel positive and really determined but I am worried about how long I will be able to sustain my sobriety.

    Once the 'novelty' of not drinking wears off I can see myself thinking I'll just have a couple of drinks after work, or just some wine with dinner, and then I'll be right back where is started. Any tips for staying stopped, which I think for me is going to be much much harder than stopping initially?!  Cheers

    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 YLT

      Posted

      I can tell you this, it sounds like we are two peas in a pod.  I am not worried about today, or tomorrow, but three months down the road.  I can never just have one so I need to realize that me being social ever with alcohol is an impossibility.  All I can say is this, we cannot control the future.  But we do own the day.  If we have no drinks during the day that is another one done.  This is something I heard a person say once which I totally agree with, I cannot control the future, but I am sober today.  Today is a good day...
    • al5aph49
      al5aph49 matthew7979

      Posted

      very wise words mathew, one day at a time, and before you know it, it will be one week at a time
    • YLT
      YLT matthew7979

      Posted

      Hi Matt. How's it going? Hope you're still booze free. I'm on day 18 now and although there have been a couple of tricky moments, it's mostly been good! 

      Anyway, wondered if you'd seen this? http://livingwithoutalcohol.blogspot.co.uk

      ive found it a really helpful chronicle of starting at day 1 of a booze free life and all the challenges, opportunities and benefits that arise along the way. She has grouped her blogs together month by month so you can read through them pretty easily. Might help you too. Cheers. Z

    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 YLT

      Posted

      Thank you so much for asking. Yes it's going great. I just got through with my fifth week of sobriety. I went to a sports bar on Saturday and while those around me were drinking I stuck with ice tea. I think one person asked me if I was going to drink. I said no with no explanation and everyone just moved on and it was no big deal. That was a great moment for me. 
    • YLT
      YLT matthew7979

      Posted

      5 weeks is brilliant. Well done.

      I don't know about you but I'm actually really enjoying being sober and determined to make it last. Got a night out next week with friends in the pub though so that will be my first big test. Determined that I will to drink though. Wondering what their reaction will be like! 

    • matthew7979
      matthew7979 YLT

      Posted

      I love not feeling like crap in the mornings. Like I said it was so anti climatic for me no one really said anything. I can't predict the future or even what will happen tomorrow but today I'm sober and today is a great day!  Matt
    • PaulJTurner1964
      PaulJTurner1964 YLT

      Posted

      Congratulations YLT, you are doing brilliantly, keep going!!
  • al5aph49
    al5aph49 YLT

    Posted

    hi YLT    VERY WELL DONE  the way i ovrcame the urge to have a drink was thinking that my next drink could be the one that kills me,i also thought of the hurt it would cause to my family and my relationship, good luck 
  • al5aph49
    al5aph49 YLT

    Posted

    VERY well done ylt keep thinking like that
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