Change of life or ruin your life?

Posted , 7 users are following.

What is wrong with me?  54 years old and enjoyed a life of good health - until I had my daughter I had never been in hospital - was even born at home.

3 months ago, at the end of a period I started getting period pains - never happened before.  This progressed into bowel cramping for a few weeks and a general feeling of being unwell.  Got so bad that I went to a doctor who referred me to a gastroenterologist.  Appointment’s tomorrow, but that has gone now.  It has been replaced by breathlessness - a feeling that my airways are narrower than they should be.  I’m trying to cough up phlegm but there’s nothing there.  Is this perimenopause?  If I could be sure it was it would really help because with each symptom I fear the worse - bowel cancer with the cramping and lung cancer with the breathlessness.       Feel like I’m going crazy - feel like I’m dying.  I wasn’t aware of these symptoms.  I feel very negative each morning when I wake up - I thought of death this morning - I’ve never been so frightened of it.     I lost my mum last year and all this is not helping with the grief.  I’m tempted to go on HRT - I need some relief from all this but can I go on it if I’m still having periods?

3 likes, 25 replies

25 Replies

Next
  • Posted

    You’re 54 and still having periods, so yes, you are perimeno for sure. Are your cycles starting to get wonky? All the symptoms hit me and coincided with spotting and also later or earlier cycles. 

    I couldn’t believe one could feel so poorly and not have something seriously wrong, and I really thought I was dying too. Diagnosed myself with many cancers and diseases. All tests showed no. Still hard to believe. 

    Now are you suffering from symptoms of peri? Probably, and they sound like normal peri symptoms, but still go get checked just for your peace of mind. Of course everything has the same symptoms so best to make sure.

    You aren’t alone, there are many of us here who have been through or are going thru the exact same things. It’s a total beeotch for sure. 

    Do NOT let health anxiety take over, don’t Google. Trust me

    • Posted

      Periods are regular as clockwork - every 24 days.  I’m getting checked out for the bowel cramping tomorrow but those symptoms have gone now.  I could book another appointment for the breathlessness and by the time Isee a doctor that probably would have cleared up too.

      I’m now trying mindfulness - to try and be calm and not some crazy wife and mother to my family.  I wonder where my chirpy self disappeared to and whether she will every return.

      It is very comforting to know I am not alone.

    • Posted

      Well said, Suzanne.  Just want to second/support the suggestion not to Google and not to let health anxiety take hold!  Very important.
    • Posted

      Mindfulness is good! I've downloaded an app on my phone and try to listen to it every day for 10 mins. I think this is so important as I too can get overwhelmed with all this horrible, debilitating symptims.

      Try and relax as much as possible and look after yourself and treat yourself as much as possible.

      I'm trying facials and massages and any other holistic treatment.

      Going to try reflexology next week in hope it might alleviate some of the symptoms. I've also heard that acupuncture can be helpful.

      I find this forum very helpful and reassuring. It's a great source of comfort!

    • Posted

      I agree, very well said Suzanne.  I don’t go on fb anymore bc there might be something sad. I turn health related commercials.  I counted one day.  You wouldn’t believe how many there are just in one show!  
    • Posted

      Ugh, those commercials... I don’t watch much TV these days, but when I do, there’s that ridiculous, ominous voice... “Tell your doctor blah blah blah.”  No wonder there’s so much health anxiety these days.  
  • Posted

    There's not a female going through meno Peri or post don't get the same symptoms ,some get it mild and short lived ,whilst others go through a tough time ,it's what hormones throw up . HRT doesent always sort the problems ,just keep saying it's just Hormones . Don't Google that's a no go area ,it will give you anxiety alone . It will get you down ,does this to us all . Go through the day your in . Stay away from Sugars and Coffee and Salt . All bad in menopause . Or at least limit . 

    • Posted

      Thanks, yes I will stop googling.  I need to get a little more positive - I booked a holiday away with my girlfriends in June and I’m wondering whether I’ll make it!
    • Posted

      Definitely agree about sugar and caffeine - working on this myself!  It makes a difference.
    • Posted

      I can also tell a big difference with sugar and caffeine as it relates to my stomach and reflux issues.
  • Posted

    Thank you ladies I can’t tell you how much your comments have helped me today! I started the day feeling rubbish.  I’m going to try to stop wallowing in self pity. 

    Today I have put on all my 80s music and dragged myself out of the darkness.  I’ve jumped on the treadmill and had sweat rolling down my face.  Still breathless but feel better for it.

    Here we are complete strangers, helping each other.  Very refreshing

  • Posted

    Go an enjoy your holiday ,I think females are the best at helping each other out ,were better at talking what we do best I say . If a problem out there lots will do research on it ,then get back with their findings ,then females can take things from there if needs be . Jaynee jay was brilliant at doing just that ,she was the one who found all the symptoms for Meno Peri and Post, which can be got up from Patient . Co . What I will say is see a female Dr in meno age ,or an elderly male dr . They're best by far . 

    • Posted

      Marlene, I like your advice about seeing an older male doctor.  I've had three gyn doctors during my adult years and the best one was an older male.  The two women who have followed were/are close to my age and really presented some serious issues for me.  The first one actually lost her license due to drug addiction.  I am seriously considering finding a good male doctor.

    • Posted

      I have thought about this many times.   There is a lot of wisdom learned from all those years of practice.  Probably isn’t much they haven’t seen.  I have a NP who is great, but she is a little younger than me and is probably praying she doesn’t turn into the fruit loop I’ve become.  I think even a NP in a busier ob/gyn practice would be much better for me.  It’s not her fault, she just doesn’t have the experience yet...and she is in a gp practice in a small town.
    • Posted

      You would think it would help to be around other women, but I find none of my friends have a clue as to what I'm going through. Even the older women, they all say they had no issues with meno. So of course they all start saying I should be on antidepressants. Then I found out that all were one something, either antidepressants or hormones! Guess they just never made the correlation between the two.

       

    • Posted

      Some women refuse to believe in the word Menopause . I've came across fair few in denial . Never admit that's their problem all along . Hey can't stay 21 yrs old for ever . We wish . These women continue in suffering silence . Strange .........Many get depression ,many get anxiety . Go for a pill or 2 if it helps you fight this meno battle .HRT whatever it may be . Atrophy that's a nightmare for women ,still not got that sorted here . Grrrr 

    • Posted

      I have friends suffering from the hot flashes  and insomnia but none have my problems so it’s hard to connect.

      I’m not suffering from insomnia, yet but often wake up around 2 or 3 and lay there waiting to go back to sleep - been like this all my life.  

      However this past week has been filled with deep wonderful nights’ sleep and I can only put it down to mindfulness that I’ve been working on.  I’ve been practising clearing my mind for about ten minutes each day.  I close my eyes and focus on a shape in the darkness - for me it looks like the peak of a mountain. The other day I fell asleep at 10am doing it!  Anyway, during the night if I feel myself coming out of my sleep, i clear my mind and I’m off again.  Really worth trying - I’m going to talk to my friend about it today - she suffers really bad.

    • Posted

      That sounds like a great mindfulness technique.  I’m glad it’s working for you and may try it myself!

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.