Coming off citalopram. :(

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I've been on 20mg citalopram now for just over a year. I decided to come off about 3 weeks ago as I had

started to feel so much better, which I put down to a combination of counselling and the drug which really did do wonders for my depression. I actually hadn't realised quite how bad it was till I started taking citalopram and I felt normal!

I've come off it properly, one every 2 days, then half every 2, then quarter every 2/3 days. The whole process took about 3/4 months. Now I'm on nothing. The physical withdrawl hasn't been too bad. I've been dizzy and kinda sick for the first week or so and that's starting to go now. However I've been feeling awful emotionally. I feel just as bad as I did before I started the medication, worse even! I feel incompetent at my job and I've even started wondering if it's right for me, I'm a teacher and I've always loved my job. I'm becoming paranoid about my relationship and tearful at the slightest thing.

I feel very depressed and unstable if that makes sense. I almost feel suicidal. Is this normal?? I really need some reassurance that I won't need to be on this for the rest of my life. sad

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  • Posted

    I've been on Cit for abut 6 months and just came to the end of my pack and decided I felt a lot better and that I could just come off it straight away and get on with my life.

    But it hasn't been so easy, it in fact feels like I have gone backwards, Especially in the evenings I feel tearful and very alone, which for the past few months hasn't been the case! I keep meaning to go back to the doctors but it feels good to think I've come off it, the fact I was on it in the first place sanderns me. Which has now turned into a bit vicious circle!

    Do you think cutting down is a good idea? I feel what i have before was perfect! Though i know i can't rely on it forever!

    x

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    • Posted

      Oh my goodness; the reason you you feel so low is because you stopped taking them so suddenly. You should never do this on your own, if you want to come off them you must always seek medical advice first. I have been on citalopram for about 5 years and only just been able to come off them, but it was a very long process of weening myself off. First it was 10mg every other day, then every 2 days etc and I did this for about a month or 2 for each stage so that it was gradual.

      I have tried in the past to just stop and it has left me feeling so ill and teary. I think you need to continue taking them and when you feel you are in a better position, see your Dr and speak to them about weening off them.

      There is no shame in taking anti-depressants. So if you do need them, do not see it as a weakness x

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    • Posted

      I reduced down to 10 mg and then stopped. For a month I felt great, loads more energy and more my old self., confident and outgoing. Then I got suddenly worse, feeling alone, sad, suicidal thoughts. This was not just because of citalapram withdrawal (had some health problems) but  I am now back on 10 mg - thinking I now need 20mg.

      I just think my ability to cope with any stress has diminished and any blip in life and I go right down hill. I think citalapram helps the hill not to get too steep.

      hope everyone feels better soon xx

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    • Posted

      Hi everyone is different -You should see you doctor before doing anything .Sometimes like bad systems just fasle us into coming off them 
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    • Posted

      Hi Laura. How didyou find your withdrawal from citalopram? How are you now? I have been on them for 10 yrs and have recently reduced to alternate days of 20mg 10mg. Soon to be 10mg daily. Id love to hear how you are getting on x
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    • Posted

      Hi Laura.  I just read your post and have been using the same process as you to wean myself off Cit. I have been taking 10mg every other day for about 5 months now and all the withdrawel symptoms have disappeared.  I last took 10 mg around 3 days ago and so far have had no adverse reaction yet. From your own experience, do you think I can get away with stopping altogether now? I wonder how long it was for you to get from every other day to coming off them completely? Also and finally the big question - are you still managing to live without them after a year plus?  Any suggestions would be grateully received.

      Thanks, Simon

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    • Posted

      Hi Laura, I've been on Cit10 for about 3 weeks now and I feel great! I see life a much happier and better place, my relationship with my fiancée is the best it's ever been. Before I started taking Cit I didn't feel depressed a lot but I still felt somewhat depressed. Now after reading a lot of these stories I feel like maybe if I get off these soon while I'm still fresh on them I won't have problems in a couple months or years from now when I do want to get off them. All this seems scary! But Cit did help me a lot and still does. Is this drug really as bad as everyone makes it seem?

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    • Posted

      Well, I came off citalophram, or am coming off citalophram, and you are right, I feel lousy--so exhausted with aches everywhere. I want to help myself naturally. Will St. Johns wort help me?
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    • Posted

      Laura, I know there is no shame in taking antidepressants, but I am looking for a natural alternative. I went off cold turkey and my dosage was 20. Now I feel so exhausted and I have to push myself to do anything! Thinking about St. Johns wort. What do you think?
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  • Posted

    I was only citralapram 20mg fro a year, I hated being on them ive always been a strong minded person and didnt really want to go on them in the first place but they did work for me and got me out of a hole!!

    I decided 8 weeks ago that I was in a good place and just stopped taking them (yes any doctor would tell you this is the worst thing you could do) but I just needed to do it. My husband has been incredibly supportive and we threw them in the bin together. Well I had two - three weeks of absolute hell, irritable, dizzyness, itching and sleepless night but I got through it. It has now been 8 weeks since I stopped taking them and I can honestly say its the best thing ive ever done not only am I happier, I feel more in control actually have some energy and some emotions back.

    Now i've just got to loose the 18lbs I put on wile taking it.

    Its not easy and you can't do it on your own but I DID IT!!!!!!! :-)

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    • Posted

      Thanks for sharing this!  The worst part about coming off Celexa is the insomnia!  I was on 40 mg. for 2 yrs.  Decreased it to 30 for a month and now I'm on 20.  Your post encourages me to keep going, even though sleepless nights are killing me!  Best wishes to you on your weight loss!
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    • Posted

      I know been over a year, but I wanted to find out how you have been? I have been off for 2 and a half week. Sleepless nights, tired most of the day. Lost a little appetite from lack of sleep. Feels like before mess, but 10 times better. Can you explain more of your symptoms when you got off meds. The two to three weeks of pain you refer to.
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    • Posted

      hi i also know this has been over a year ago! lol. i was on 20mg for a few months and doc says im not depressed so i should go cold turkey sad im kinda worried about this as im going abroad on my own for 3 weeks starting next week and i dont know what ot do if i experience bad withdrawals sad can i ask how u coped with the symptoms? i have a feeling ill need lots of it! also if  i get bad withdrawals,, would taking the 20mgs again stop them? rolleyes sorry i know ru not a doc. im just scared to ask mine cos she kept saying it was fine rolleyes blah idk

      Eva xoxo

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    • Posted

      Most doctors tell you to slowly come off, I did half pill for a while, thirds and than zero. I had mild dizzie, tired spells but overall was good. Than insomnia   Hit me. But I had to adjust my sleep schedule to try and get better sleep. I have seen on other blogs that if you feel symptoms, take what you was taking before, and if it goes away, it's a side effect. I would ask you doctor to help you come off slow. Most doctors will tell you a plan to cut down. I did my process myself, because that's what my wife was told by her doctor. Good luck and keep me updated please. 
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    • Posted

      Hi I have very slowly started to come off cit. I tried taking it every other day then every 2days then every 3 then every and so on. I got to 10mg every 8days so decided to completely stop but the side affects are still there, really dizzy zapps in my head, feeling sick, hot and cold and no energy at all. I have been on it for 3years now, after reading about seritonine syndrome I have started taking it again. I'm 24 and really want to get off and have kids. Has anyone got any advice for me. Hope you are all well
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    • Posted

      See if you can find my old posts but that is far too quick. To reduce. That's why you had a problem. I took a year to come off 20 mg. Reducing the dosr by 2.5 mg each time using a pillcutter on 10 mg tabs and staying on each reduction for 4/6 weeks . Finally was on 1.25 mg..approx! As my last dose. Been off now 3 weeks. 
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    • Posted

      Thanks so much for posting. Like you, I was against anti-depressants and had never been on them. I got talked into going on Cit for anxiety and insomnia almost two years ago. I was on 10mg until earlier this year when a few situations in my life made me feel like I needed a stronger dose. I asked for a 20mg prescription, but by the time I got it, I didn't feel like I needed it so I cut the pills in half for a while. Then my mother died unexpectedly. I started taking the 20mg pills that day. It's been 2 months and now I really want to get off of them completely. Your post gives me hope. I gained 15 pounds while on Cit. Hope we both have luck with that issue!
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    • Posted

      Well I was just saying to another post tnat I was so irritable last few days have decided to look at St. John's wort which my GP did suggest at one point and I dismissed . It's so easy isn't it to think up tne dose..believe me I have thought the same way whilst I was reducing them ....my parents are both in nursing homes , neither of them well. Life gets more stressful doesn't it . By the time these tablets arrive I will have had 4 weeks off cit so shouldn't have a problem with seratonin syndrome . I am a big boned ..ha ha..woman anyway but am sure I have tne weight gain too...
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    • Posted

      Hi! I see that you posted this 3 months ago. If you are still getting these messages - could you tell me how you are doing 3 months later? I went from 20 to 10 last 2 weeks and now for the last 4-5 days the exhaustion is very bad during the day... I will try cutting down by 2.5 every 4 weeks - maybe it will help... Did you have any withdrawal symptoms??

      Any suggestions would be great! smile Thank you!!

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    • Posted

      No I didn't but I took a year to get off cit. then on the cit free month that followed   , by the end of the month as the ridiculous low dose of 1,25 mg left my body, I cud feel the problems return

      I put mysrlf on st Jon's wort one tab.. At night...332mg I think but after two weeks upped that to one on morning as well. Am holding my own in wat I see as a low chemical balance problem. But I am at gym 3/4 times a week. Do meditation classes. And listen to meditation podcasts on iTunes daily.  It helps. I will never be able to cope on my own because I do feel it's the chemical balance that tips me sideways!  

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    • Posted

      Hi been reading down through the discussions and glad to see that you got got good advice from some where.  Have been trained in chemical imbalances - mainly due to counselling in a drug rehabilitation christian centre.  I have been on 20 mg for 4 years due to hormone imbalance which is causing the chemical imbalance.  Most people don't know this but your hormones actually control over 400 functations of your body.  When I started going through perimenopausal years I had a breakdown due to my hugh hormone fluctuations - which a lot of women end up experiencing.  Have lots of experience on this and I myself will be coming down off citalopram now that my hormones are coming back under control due to extensive research and being under a professor.  They actually had to shut my pituitary down at one stage to get things under control - my case was severe.  The guy I trained under for counselling advised me that you should drop very slowly like you did - but you should drop the 2.5 mg - then let your chemicals rebalance for 3 months before dropping again - it takes approx 3 months for your body to level out properly.  Have been given a good herbal remedy to help you if any one is interested.  This is a subject very close to my heart, along with infertility - I know some one who got pregnant using hrt due to hormone imbalance. I have helped quite a few women who have had hormone imbalances caused by 5 year implants, etc. etc. As hormones have such an impact on the brain and can cause depression, anxiety, insomnia and even more severe symptoms like I have had the list was endless.  I hope this helps.
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    • Posted

      i have been on citalopram 40mg for about 8 years & a few months ago managed to knock it down to 30mg but every time I try & get it any lower I go through horrific withdrawal symptoms inc awful headaches, cramps, sickness but worst of all really bad mood swings/irritability & tearfulness. I am trying to knock it down again for the last week & now my husband is threatening to leave me because I lost my temper so badly last night. I was advised to try to come off it as I have been diagnosed with adult ADHD in the last yr & am on Concerta XL 72mg/day & apparently these 2 drugs can make anxiety worse...?  Given your experience & training do you have any advice as I am wondering whether to abandon trying to come off it again as these symptoms all come flooding back. I am a teacher with children & simply can't take time off to get through this so anyone's advice would be much appreciated. Do you think a merena coil would aggravate these symptoms as I have had this for last 8 years too. Thanks in advance. 
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    • Posted

      Hi there,

      I so feel for you.  Yep, if your symptoms started around when you had the merena coil fitted, I totally agree this is what is causing your so say ADHD.  They tried to fit me with one, but luckily on a stay in hospital I manged to talk to this lovely nurse who also had training in the same area as me and told me to avoid it like the plague - in another forum on citalopram there are plenty who are suffering from hormone imbalances. They are fitting lots of people with these 5 year implants and my God some of those poor girls are throwing bipolar symptoms and being labelled.  Have helped get some sorted.  My mum was a sister and she worked with people also who had chemical imbalances - they tried to label me at 39, but like you these things don't just arrive, but I already knew it was my hormones. I would recommend getting it removed - but it can take a while for your hormones to settle down.  I am on citalopram whilst going through an early menopause due to my ovaries being hyper all my life.  COuldn't take the pill would be bouncing off the ceiling - so would my mum.  Good luck their are specialists out there that can help and if you need any other advice always here.

      Lots of big hugs.

      Mel Xx

      p.s.  Citalopram comes highly recommended whilst hormones being sorted out.  I talked to the pituitary organisation.  My symptoms were far more severe than ADHD, I have evorel conti patches which are stopping my high hormone fluctuations.  They are just getting sorted as they shut my pituitary down at one stage to give my body a break.   So will be coming down off citalopram 20 mg but very slowly.  2.5 mg over a 3 month period before doing any more.  Used to be on 30 mg.  For my hormones I see a lovely professor in endocrinology.

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    • Posted

      Thanks for your kind reply Melanie. It is amazing how much we don't get told about the effects of contraception implants etc. I am definitely going to arrange to have mirena removed & see how I go from there. Best of luck with your health too. 😊
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    • Posted

      No probs there is lots they don't tell you, but basically if you read the book you will see that all studies are done on men!!!!  Women and hormones are greatly not explored.  For instance I have an adrenal problem, due to when my hormones come in at night, especially around ovulation or my period lots of adrenaline comes in with mine.  But there are facts you can find out there is one site called woman to woman and they will tell you your adrenal, thyroid and hormones are all interlinked, etc. etc., all controlled by your pituitary and make up your endocrine system.  I have seen people describe brain zap.  Have discussed that with the Professor I am under.  It is my pituitary going in to hyper drive due to my hormones again when they are coming in - but I could actually feel it thumping behind my nose as well as the symptoms others have described.  He did say it was the best description he had heard.  All of these plus even worse symptoms have been calmed down by the patch.  They don'[t tell you going through menopause for some women is hell, the chemical imbalance it causes and basically it stresses your body to breaking point.  Over the weekend I am going to do some discussions on brain zap, hormones, etc. etc. should have some time then.  Don't wish to scare any people as I have been labelled as severe.  Most of the time problems occur when people are chemically sensitive.  But most of the time they cover the side effects to some women as mood swings!!!  Best of luck to you too.
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    • Posted

      Hi Melanie

      I went on 10mg of cit last January 2014 for anxiety due to perimenopausal. I have never suffered with depression, anxiety etc previously. I am 49.  After six weeks I increased to 20mg and finally felt like my old self again!!! I cant tell you how amazing I felt! My doctor now wants me to start gradually coming off. Over Xmas I reduced to 20mg every other day as I had ran low of tablets. I decided to keep this going but last week I started to feel anxious again realising straight away that this was probably due to my reduction of Cit.

      I have got more tablets and am back to one a day so I am hoping to to back to how I was feeling.

      I am very interested in what you say regarding hormones and perimenopausal and the tremendous effect it can have and for years. (My sister experienced this). I really would like to find out more about this. I am concerned that my doctor wont want me to stay on the 20mg. I really dont think I am ready to come off them?!

      Thanks so much in advance.

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    • Posted

      Hi there Mo.

      Oh it is so good to hear that you got back to your old self!  No don't come off the citalopram and stay at 20mg.  Citalopram is well known for keeping homones at bay from fluctuating widely.  It will probably take a little while to calm down again.

      I am a wealth of knowledge on this and due to my severe and I mean severe fluctuations due to being perimenopausal I did so much research before finding the professor I am under in endocrinology.  This is due to the pituitary which releases all the chemicals which tells our ovaries and in turn effects our thyroid, adrenal and all sorts of things.  Hormones control over 400 functions in our bodies, including effects on our brains.

      Basically what you need is a good hrt replacement - they have got me on evorel conti and believe you me, my husband can't believe the difference.  Now and only now am i reducing from 20 mg, again which the professor has said I needed to stick until hormones balances out.

      So sunday I dropped from 20 mg to 15 mg I trained in a drug rehab centre and they recommend doing any thing like this real slow.  So 3 months at 15 mg to get my chemicals to rebalance out and then I will drop to 10mg and probably stay there until gone through the menopause as it really does stress the body out.  There are so many woman on citalopram to get them through the changes this presents.

      You can tell your GP that professors recommend this.

      I was up to 30 mg last year as they shut my pituitary down for a while to give my body a break.  Then reduced back to 20 mg again dropping 5 mg for 3 months and then another 5 mg.  No effects but obviously did stress my body out a little but soon readjusted.  Whilst reducing in early days can recommend a herbal remedy - real good.  They use in the drug rehab - as they have to go cold turkey if you wish.

      I have been on cit 20 for 5 years and the professor has said he will not rush me off it or the patches - natural oestrogen and patches are the best, as patches continuous supply and don't wear off like the tabs.

      Good luck and all the best.

      Big hugs  Mel Xx

      p.s.  always here if you need any advice.

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    • Posted

      Mel thanks so very much for the long reply. You sound like you have been through and learnt a lot. I really value your advice and I really want to stay on the CIT as a year isn't very long.

      That book does sound good I will look for it on my kindle. I guess it really helps to understand how you are feeling?

      That's very nice to know that I can message you, thanks . My sister is a great support to me and I think these forums are so good.

      I am going to see my doctor so perhaps I could discuss the HRT.

      thanks so much again and I will message again

      Glad u have managed to sort things yourself and long may it continue!

      M. Xx

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    • Posted

      So glad to be of help.

      Support is the best - we weren't meant to do things alone, and it is real good that your sister has been through it and can give you the hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel. 

      There is life after the menopause and boy will I throw a party when I have gone through it - lol!!!!

      Big hugs Mel Xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel

      I feel so much more positive, thank you. My anxiety has mostly gone away (been back daily on the cit for over a week now). Yes my sister is great! And thanks to people like you also as its great to talk to someone who is actually going through exactly the same thing!!!

      Yes party sounds good!

      I am going to the doctor in 2 weeks so I will let you know how i get on.

      Hope you have a great weekend :-) xx

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    • Posted

      I don't feel so good this weekend...still have headache everyday frm going back on CIT 20 daily but my anxiety has returned.

      My partner had a meltdown and a real moan last weekend and I can't get it out of head. I feel like I'm living on my nerves a bit Mel, does that make sense? He can be moody to which I He can be moody to which I usually just ignore! I love him we been together a few years.

      And on Friday I thought I was getting there! Hope it's just a blip. Damon hormones have a lot to answer for!

      Any words of wisdom are welcome!!!

      Thanks Mel xx

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    • Posted

      Oh I so feel for you.

      Unfortunately whilst going through the high hormone fluctuations that happen whilst going through these years really do bounce us all over the shop.

      Yes it does make sense my husband and me spend a lot of time together and are soul mates but the other day I was feeling really emotional (hormonal) and we never have cross words, but he got it full bore.  Plus when I feel like this if he shouts at our 18 month boxer who is quite naughty.  It really grates on my nerves.  So I totally understand as normally every thing goes over the top of my head.  Not being able to get it out of your head - that's the hormones making us over sensitive I get this too.

      Headaches again when things are coming in and going out, hormones, I get really severe headaches and had a brain scan - lots of woman suffer like this and they discovered it is my sinuses - because oestrogen does do this - read also citalopram can play them up as well whilst settling in etc.

      If you look at oestrogen dominant on the web you might recognize a lot of the other things on there.  As my ovaries are low and I didn't know as nobody explains that when they get like this they start really pumping to try and make your body kick start them - hence lots of oestrogen and head aches as well as our pituitary going in to over drive, which puts pressure on your sinuses.

      The mention of hormones are banned in this household!!!!!

      Oh with me I am 1 week in to reducing from 20 to 15mg on cit - which upsetting the apple cart but now my hormones have settled down want to get back to 10 mg - but stressing me at moment so hormones a bit more noticeable - what a double bind!!!! 

      But know I will get there Xx 

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    • Posted

      Thanks Mel you always make me feel better! And thats exactly it, things that would normally go over my head just irritate me and I tend to think back to bad things that have happened in the past etc, it is almost irrational!!!!!!!!! And yes things totally go round in my head and I have force myself in to trying to feel positive...its soooo tiring!

      I realise that by reducing the cit to what I did and then suddenly going back to the full dosage means its going to take a little while to go back to the great that i was feeling?? Do you agree??

      But I am at work, eating and sleeping fairly well...all good signs?! Im just negative with makes me anxious or is it the anxiety that makes me negative???!!!!! 

      I hope you find 15mg ok? So hard to make changes isnt it because it is the worry that goes with going through it!!! 

      You will be fine.. I am sure I will be too!!! :-) 

      Thank you again Mel xx

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    • Posted

      Tell me I am a very positive, confident, outgoing person who loves a good laugh and then I become negative, don't want to go out and just want to dive under the duvet and stay there - it is so warm, no one there just me and I can curl up and sleep, rather than feeling overwhelmed by the world.  Don't worry those days are few and far between only when my ovaries are building and feel like they are going to explode and before my period!!!!!  I had 18 months without them when they shut my pituitary down to give my body a break - bliss!!!!

      But through my training I know they are just feelings that we don't have to give in to and can put them to the back of our minds and push through - yep tiring!!!!  Another double bind - do I don't I??  Oh decisions.

      FInding 15mg okay just the hormones kicking hard to deal with - my pet hate!!!

      Yes I agree about the cit.  All good signs - you are doing really well - just look at where you have come from should give you some positivity.

      My husband calls it my scatty time lol.

      I have a really good friend - both suffer the same - ring her up and have a really good laugh about it, it sooooooooo helps..

      Big hugs Mel Xxlol

      Here any time you need

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    • Posted

      Yes exactly! When I feel like this I feel flat, brain fogged and unsociable...and when Im happy everyone knows it cos I'm just full of the joys!!!!

      You seem to be doing very well and you are confident ...yes my partner says 'have u taken ur happy pills?!

      Seriously tho (!) I should be positive as u say. I was in this boat a year ago and I only remember 2014 being a happy year for me...thanks YET again Mel!!! Positive thoughts, positive thoughts !!!

      What so u think of CBT by the way?

      Thanks it good to write all this down smile xx

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    • Posted

      I tried a lot of different things and when I was put on Lexapro, it worked like a champ. I was a new person in days. Celexa is basically the same in generic form, so it is a lot less expensive. But the point is that I had to go through a lot of unsuccessful, or only "so so" meds befor eI found the right ones for my brain chemestry.

      It took a lot of time and but when you find what works, I think you should stick with it and just adjust doses (or come off) based on your health at that time. My doses have gone up and down on all htree of my meds. Sometimes I need more, based on my anxiety level, and sometimes I need less. I just know myself. If I get up in the morning and can't seem to focus or get started, I know that it is caused by my anxiety being elevated, so I take a half of a clonipin and see how I feel in 30 minutes. I also know exactly how long the effects of my ambien last, so if I want to get up earlier in the morning, I take it earlier in the evening. I think you just really have to pay attention to yourself and know that a mood swing or anything that is "off" may mean I just need to adjust my meds very slightly that day. I am always trying to take the minimum, but sometimes my body and mood are telling me I need a little boost that day. Like I said, I take 20mg of celexa in the am and 10mg in the pm, but if my anxiety has been super high, I may make it 20mg in the pm as well. When you wean down, you have to go slow and pay close attention to how you feel. What could just be a bad day for other people is probably your body telling you to make a slight adjustment to your meds. I am not a doctor, but my doc does know that I make small adjustments downwards, but never over what i am prescribed.

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    • Posted

      Hi there,

      Guess what mine was I got another one of those nasty things that I hate - a period!!!  That is the second one this month.  No wonder I felt like crap yesterday.  The trouble is with me I bring in a lot of adrenaline with my hormones, especially to bring my period in, so last night I could have run the marathon and this morning - well just exhausted.

      At one stage I had to have adrenaline blockers - never again, that is the only time I have suffered with depression and I mean bad - once off them - all disappeared.  I wouldn't suggest them to any body.  So put up with the adrenaline - only a couple of times a month.

      Brain fog - tell me about it.  Had got all that sorted and learning spanish at the moment.  Was doing really well - as there are lots of short cuts in it - my brain loves short cuts.  How it functions.  Now I have trouble even thinking about it - but know it is because of the reduction of citalopram and down to withdrawal and a double whamy month.  Oh boy who would be a woman.

      As you say positive thoughts - not long now and all this should end, oh please God.  I must be the only woman on earth who wants to get old so that the menopause will hurry up - oh what a party I will throw, lol.  As I told the professor I want my life back.  I am severe with my symptoms because my heart used to stop and my blood pressure drop through the floor etc. etc. before the patches.

      CBT never thought about it, but in saying that before all of this I was always hyper from my hormones - as my ovaries had run wild for years and then all of the sudden bang - oestrogen dropped and so did I.  So I had to learn to accept at first - which was a big step for me - patience has never been my strong point - every body used to say Rome wasn't built in a day - well I did - had tremendous energy to not a lot.

      So once acceptance hit I love to create so when can't do a lot physically, I knit socks - jazzy ones - taken up quilting and knit real hard design jackets etc.  Have always loved a challenge.  Luckily these things run in our family.  Next year going to take up dress making - mum was real good at it and she taught me how to make curtains.  So that is my therapy.  Last year joined a choir - that really is fun - couldn't really sing - but can now after being taught how to.  Loved it we learnt how to sing Goodnight sweet heart, etc. etc.

      I hope as always this helps - best source of medicine as my dad would say is laughter and lots of it - girly down time.

      Big hugs as always Mel Xxcry  Me today could have a real good boo hoo, that helps as well.  Not normally an emotional person - but today could have one.

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    • Posted

      Hello Sheila

      Thanks, that is very interesting. I basically have been on 20mg of Cit for one year and it has worked like a dream..over xmas I was forgetting to take the odd tablet and noticed i was almost on one every other day so I continued that way.. i now realised that was a mistake! I think i felt so good that i thought it would be ok! I am now back on 20 everyday..this has been for 11 days and I am up and down (I guess my body is having to readjust yet again!).

      You are right, it takes a while to find out what is right (I started on 10mg, not enough!). Once you are there is such a relief...

      Thanks for your reply :-)

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    • Posted

      Oh no Mel, that is why you felt so rubbish!!!! Damn things and yes who would want to be a woman! 

      Its funny cos I saw your earlier replies regarding the merina coil...guess what? My first symptoms started when i had my second coil put in? When I questioned my doctor at the time she said there was no way it was down to the coil? My first coil worked brilliantly for five years.. I have always been a little thoughtful regarding the second one! (I have had it for 18 months now).

      I agree that laughter etc helps... and hey guess what...I definitely feel a bit more 'me' this morning!!!! And keeping busy is no prob with me I have a family and a full time job etc etc and I read loads.

      You sound so positive anyway, well done! We will get there!!!!.

      You are a fab inspiration to me - thank you Mel razz and hugs to you.

      xx

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    • Posted

      Hi there hope you still feeling like the old you!!!

       My last GP asked the professor under if would help my hormones the merina coil.  Needless to say haven't got one!!  I wouldn't have one after what I learnt, through a nurse.  But think as we get older the hormone fluctuations get worse.  As they go higher than when pregnant and then just drop and like coming off cliff edge.  I was so bad at one stage my body would go in to complete shock and the cold sweats that would break out from my hands and feet, etc. etc. were horrendous - didn't think going to make it.  Thank God with the Everol Conti all behind me.  I know for a fact I needed the extra eostrogen, but also the progesterone to steady me out which they have got.  As since 30 my periods were non existent due to not having enough progesterone.  My GP on questioning it said well you are 30 - no it was just a right imbalance!!!!  Ah well that is all behind me.  Love the professor I am under - so human and so has time for you and loves to answer the questions - than just fob you off - as they don't want to admit they don't know what they are talking about - don't get me wrong some of them who specialise in womens wellbeing like the one I am under now does - but had to find her and a better one couldn't wish for as she listens rather than tries to tell me and what ever I and the professor suggest is no trouble. 

      Feeling lot better now 2nd period arrived this month just washed out - I know before started injections my periods were getting closer together - 3 weeks.  But month before 5 weeks apart. 

      As always ever hopeful that the menopause is round the corner and I will get my life so back.

      Take care and keep us informed how things going.

      Mel wink Xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel

      All very interesting what u say...thank you.

      I just googled merina coil and anxiety and I'm shocked by what I have read! It's certainly something that I will talk to my GP about.

      I don't feel too bad thanks I think I'm improving every day! Glad u r feeling better.

      I'm having an early night!

      Speak soon xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo

      Glad u feeling better.  Once you know what is going on - it so helps!!!

      I so would like to do a blog on here.  Our hormones are the building blocks of our bodies.  It is what puts as out of balance physically as well as mentally by our neuro chemistry.  Hence chemical imbalances, etc. etc.  Main cause of anxiety and depression.

      But so glad you got to do some looking in to things.

      Catch u soon Xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel

      HORMONES ARGGHHHH!!

      I dont feel too good at all this morning!

      My partner's sons argued last night and although my partner was ok,  i got all anxious that something was really going to kick off! Oh and I was doing so well! And then work is very stressy today so I feel pretty bad Mel, headachey, swallowing alot, butterflies.

      I am now a little worried about the coil if I am honest but have docs next 

      Weds

      As I have improved during this week, i hope this is just a blip? Its almost like im worried about worrying?!!! Does that make sense?

      I hate feeling negative, I am normally a very happy person but I think altering the CIT has really sent me down! Back on 20 a day, 13th day - still early days??

      Yes blog sounds good.

      Always good to hear from you xxx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Oh I so do feel for you.  Hormones make us oh so sensitive to things, arguments especially. 

      But yes the reduction in cit would have up set the apple cart, but you will level out again, I know first hand how it feels like taking forever and not wanting to feel like that.

      Don't worry about the coil - you can get it taken out and yes it will take your hormones probably 6 months ish to resettle down.  But at least you will be covered  by CIT whilst they do.

      I have been to hell and back with mine try looking up menstural cycle and physcosis.  I had no back up, my gp wouldn't listen to me and I was all alone fighting this - knowing what was going on - my 3 cousins suffered this, so did my nan.  Mine didn't become apparent til my oestrogen dropped drastically - I literally use to dread my periods.  However research - pituitary organisation - they said cit the best for hormone imbalance - obviously as my chemicals imbalanced.

      I could write a book with what I went through and probably will.  If it wasn't for the professor that the pituitary org recommended I couldn't have got my medical record rewritten as they had me down as schizophrenic even though no evidence apart from 1 physcosis.  Not on any medication except cit and like my mum said doesn't just happen!!!!

      Stay positive and at least you are one step ahead of most people and you can see light at the end of the tunnel.

      Those patches really have balanced me back out as patches don't wear off like tabs - everol conti - they were recommended by a head gyny along with the professor I am under.

      Don't know what day of your cycle your on??

      Big hugs and lots of love Mel lol Xx

       

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    • Posted

      Oh Mel you are a such a help for me with your replies, you always make me feel better.

      Yes I have upset the apple cart and YES I will balance out! Its just going to take a bit of time and I should know this because I have been here before...its just that this morning (I feel a bit better now) is the worst i think i have ever felt because of last night...and it really wasnt a big deal but its just like my brain just couldnt cope with the stress! 

      Hormonessssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!

      Yes you have been through so much and I like speaking to you because you have the knowledge, it is good to know that CIT is the best one to be taking whilst going through this rollercoaster!

      No monthlies now due to the coil??? So dont know where I am...another thing I have always been unsure of!

      Yes  will discuss the patches with doc...

      Thanks Mel :-) hope your day is going well, I am def feeling brighter this afternoon!!! 

      xxx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi there Mo,

      So glad you feeling better.   Could give you a big hug!!

      Unfortunately our hormones come in at night.  I never have any prob falling asleep and in fact sleeping in general until ovulation / night before period, when hormones wake me up because of the adrenaline (hence physcosis).  So mornings are always worse especially on waking.

      By mid day they wear off - thank God.  Cause of two periods this month - one day just felt so sick all morning!!  Yuk don't do feeling sick!!!

      Yes I didn't have periods for 18 months when they shut the pituitary down to give me a break as my body couldn't handle the stress it puts on our body and mind.  You are oh so correct, it's enough for us to go through the hormones.  But I paid double when I come off them, but it did make me feel better.  I mean I had a constant period for about 3 months.  But it was putting my blood pressure up as normally don't have a blood pressure prob - but that is back to normal now thank God as my doctor was getting a little concerned.

      Even though got coil - a cycle will still be going on - as it was for me even though no periods and a surpressed pituitary.

      Mm surpressing periods, unless absolutely necessary, just lets things build.  But I can honestly say when I got my first period it was just a release and the patches made me feel just soooooo much better my husband couldn't believe the difference.

      As always take care, big hugs Mel wink Xx

      Keep us

       

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    • Posted

      Hey Mel did a long reply to u but it disappeared and hasn't replied!

      Reply in morning, lovely to hear frm u as always.

      Sleep well and thank u xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel

      Yes looking forward to going to the doctors to discuss various! First thing is the CIT to settle my hormones back down to where I was! Definitely feel brighter this morning, I had a lovely relaxing evening last night and slept ok. Day 14 so I hope it wont take too long now!!!!

      Yes i am interested in those patches, they sound like they have done great for you...but CIT first!

      Glad you are doing good!!! I am so hoping I am getting there too rolleyes.

      Hope you have a good day. The sun is shining here in Surrey! 

      Hugs to you xx

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    • Posted

      Totally agree with you.  Glad you had better eve.

      I have come such a long way.  When all this started in 2009 - didn't even want to be in a room by myself as my heart was stopping etc. etc and we lived in the middle of no where, with no neighbours - never again.  But hey that is definitely in the past. 

      That is why I decided to do what I did, because of the lack of help and understanding I got, being left to get on with it, with no support etc. etc. - and when this is all over I will either get a degree in hormones!!!!! or mental health - probably both, as they are so inter related.

      Having real good day.  Still got period, but since yesterday less hormonal and my body has got used to the reduction in cit.  So next week can go back to spanish and actually take it in again as was doing so well.

      Here in Spain glorious sun shine just come back from walking our 18 month old boy boxer - barrel load of monkey's he is.

      Notice on one of my news letters from women's wellbeing that lack of vit d - they are putting down to all sorts of things.  I definitely suffer from SAD and know from the professor that is hormonally linked.  I feel so alive in the sun.  Out door person too.

      Lots of women on my travels have said they love wintering in the sun due to their hormonal probs.

      We packed every thing in - still rent our property out - but live in an american rv and go between Spain and England as there is no way I could work with the exhaustion I get.  But my husband works here and there and lucky because of his qualifications can pick things up.

      It is so much cheaper to live here, especially with the exchange rate and we only pay 10 euros a day - that includes all our water, electricity, no council tax, no tv license etc, etc.  Oh yes not forgetting that diesel here is 1.02 euros, which equates back to under 80 p.  Not like rip off Britian - but that's another subject.  So to live here cost £1,800 + our food obviously and again clothes such better quality and sooooooooooo cheap.

      Hugs to you too Xx

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    • Posted

      You have come a long way!

      And yes you will have a degree! I didnt realise so much was linked to hormones. Vit D is def lacking here at moment! Sounds likes your life is very relaxing in Spain, lovely! I dont blame you for moving away, I dont think I could but Spain is so nice in the winter. And the fact that its so much more reasonable.

      Will look in to Vit D! cool

      I am continuing to have a pretty good day..fingers crossed. Am at my partners tonight with the rowdy teenagers lol! I think i can cope!  I really hope I am on the right track now 

      xxx Enjoy the sun Mel

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Hope you having a really good weekend.

      Had coffee with my friend yesterday.  Her daughter has had lots or probs with her hormones and anxiety and I have to hold my hands up redface she had CBT.  Sorry with the training I have had it is called reality thinking.  Any ways she had a really good one and it worked - but they were counselling her at the same time and got to the route cause of her anxiety being that her mum had a serious bike accident and they didn't think she was going to make it.  She had a really good counsellor.

      Okay this has really helped me as after all the adrenaline that comes in with my hormones, my brain hates it and marks it as danger, as it remembers what happened just before the physcosis as I could feel all the adrenaline hitting my brain - yuk.

      So with my training in the drug rehab I learnt about the lymbic part of the brain.  Sorry just me - I need to know the in's and out's of a ducks arse lol!!!

      The lymbic is our subconscious.  It stores all our emotions, feelings, responses and traumas.  It also controls our survival responses like flight, fight or freeze.  So any shadow and I mean shadow of a former event will signal to the brain danger and the exact same feelings will be brought fore front.  So the brain is seeking reassurance.  So it took a while but all I had to do was switch subscious thinking to reality (logic) and tell my brain there is nothing happening it is safe nothing to panic about.

      CBT is the same but they teach you to replace negative with positive, which works the same way replacing panic mode with logic (reality).

      Hope this so helps and yes I would find a good teacher on this as it really does help, but there are also some not so good.

      Renewing of the mind and learning how it works has been found in studies to really help - I could just picture Mrs Tishall in Doc Martin with the elastic band as they tried this CBT with us to do with golf - as it really is a mind over matter game - but the woman who came and gave us the talk did little for me, so didn't want to comment.

      As always big hugs (Mel) xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel! cheesygrin

      I had a lovely weekend thank you, how was yours? Although i did work Saturday but never mind! I am feeling sooooo much better! I think these tabs are brilliant. Dont think 100% yet but nearly there!

      That is so interesting what you were saying on Saturday. When I read it it was like ' that is exactly how I can feel!'. My doctor was telling me about too much adrenaline and how we can view it as danger. I know that this is the kind of thing I feel when I am not right. I am nervous about being in a tricky or difficult situation (something is going to go wrong, I am not going to be able to cope etc etc)

      The lymbic part of the brain really interests me.You word it all so well Mel! Particularly the part of former events etc.

      I am so glad I got to talk to you on here!

      I would like to really get into learning more, CBT or other.

      I must go now but I hope you have a lovely day and always fab to hear from you. I hope you are still feeling good?

      Lots of hugs xx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi there glad to hear you had a good one and that you are feeling soooo much better.  I had a good one too.

      That feeling is because our hormones leave us feeling not in control - overwhelmed and basically exhausted.  I have talked to lots of women and the two most common ones are getting impatient at the til when shopping or in a shop with lots of people and driving.

      When I was at my worst I couldn't co-ordinate etc and really didn't feel safe to drive again the brain craves to be safe and I actually am a real good driver. etc. etc.  Lots of women do suffer from burn out going through perimenopausal years in to menopause and am sure it is the adrenaline factor.  It is medical fact adrenaline brings our hormones in - I had so much in my system when I had the physcosis (from my hormones) they don't know how my heart withstood it.  But I was also having acupuncture to get me through which made it ten times worse - but that's another subject - as it is not as good as they make out for us and they are starting to realise this as explained by my GP!!!!  Did some research on this to - mm.

      Any way as always here if you got any questions or feelings/emotions need answers to. The one good thing I did learn is that they are just feelings and we don't have to give in to them - we can choose our thoughts - not saying easy, but once we start to reprogramme that lymbic oh boy can we start to feel in control again.

      Other - go a bit careful on I worked along side a mental health team with a woman I was helping and they have started to realize that all these alternative therapies are starting to bring peoples anxieties out.  Noticed there is also evidence of that on here as there are lots of people talking about Reiki and the spiritual side and after having talked to a real close friend of mine they are taught to pray things over you their beliefs, etc. etc.  After an experience I had wouldn't let any body near me unless I really trusted them.  The spiritual side of life is something we are not supposed to mess with. 

      I spent another whole day keeping a 17 year old girl out of a mental institution (I am crb checked and they knew I was with her).  But what some people can install in to our subsconcious through different things is amazing.  Somebody only has to repeat something four times and our sub believes it.  The power of the mind is amazing and as such taught we should guard it very carefully.  Not wacky this is all medical fact.

      A friend of mine who was a consultant has said that I should do the degree in mental health and probably would as love to help people where I was left to fight things and do it alone.

      Fab to hear from you to.

      Lots of hugs too Xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel!

      Sorry I havent been in touch, i have had two work days from hell! I think the cit helped me cope but i felt a little anxious as it was extremely stressful... today couldnt be more different! I am relaxed and feel quite happy!

      How are you?

      As usual, i loved reading your last post... guess what? I went to the doc and she happy for me to stay on the CIT for another year and a half and then take from there! I am lucky she is so understanding!

      Mel I must go as quite busy. But I hope you are good and the sun is shining 

      Hugs as always xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Sorry to hear you are having hell at work, but on the other hand good that you coped with it.  Feeling anxious in extremely stressful situations is perfectly normal.  So glad today you are feeling relaxed and quite happy.  That shows your back.  As if you were just plain anxious would still have it all going around in your head.  Good for youcheesygrin.

      I am doing really well.  My body has adjusted to dropping to 15mg - think it stressed my brain out for about 10 days - then felt perfectly fine.  Thank God.  So wait another couple of months and then drop another 5 mg to 10 mg - then think I'll stay there until after the menopause.  See the professor in May, and will see then how my ovaries are doing - think two years ago they were 8. 1 - 3 very low and just there, 3 - 8 low.  So must be getting there any way the test should show!

      So pleased for you that your doctor has agreed to let you stay on CIT for another year and half - that takes a weight off your shoulders. Having a good GP is second to none.

      We had a lovely day out today - try once a week, and celebrating tonight as we had news today from the company we have had a legal fight with - that it has gone in our favour, lucky for me able to do it myself and hasn't cost us a bean, except my time in drafting letters, etc.  Also our dog is responding better to his medication - than the last he was on.

      We rescued him here and is a spanish boxer - beautiful, but we didn't realize he had leishmania which they have an epidemic of here.  Basically it is a parasite in the sand flies & mosquitos, but it puts them in to organ failure if untreated.   

      So all in all going well.

      Hugs back as always. Xx

      p.s. sure as we get older we don't handle stress either as well as when we are young!!  I forget that I am not 20 any more, but middle aged 45!!

      Report Reply
    • Posted

      Hello Mel! How are you?

      You sound like you are doing great! Healthwise and everything else! Yes going to the 15mg sounds like its worked ok for you and yes I dont blame you for wanting to remain on the 10mg, I think it is a good idea. Hope you enjoyed your celebratory night out cheesygrin. Good news re your dog, he sounds adorable.

      Yes really pleased re doc and I think the relief has improved my mood even more, i feel great! Really looking forward to the weekend... in your words, I am definitely back!!!! 

      Hope you have a lovely weekend, its beautiful today here, really sunny but its a chillly 4 degrees!

      Hugs to you.

      PS I am older, 49..  a big birthday this year but really looking forward to it!!!! xx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi  Mo,

      So glad your definitely back - it is a real good feeling!!!!  It gives you the motivation to start planning again, without thinking what am I going to be feeling like.

      Doing really well and know in a couple of months when drop to 10 mg will be good, just need to get through the first week and then will be fine.  Plan it and make sure can have a few duvet days, get some good movies etc. etc.  It will be once back in England.  Turbo is great and has come such a long way.  But I love working with dogs, put a lot in to him, for a 18 month old boxer, who is on his 3rd owner, every body adores him.  Met a guy the other day who trained rescue mountain dogs and he said that he was so good.

      Ah our weather this weekend.  We got a storm on the way - the wind is really picking up - but today it felt like summer again - breezy, but so warm.  Any way by Tuesday the weather will be getting warmer here.  But between now and then, tomorrow we will be rocked in our rv and Sunday plus some of that horrible wet stuff.  Probably only had 3/4 days so far this winter.

      Can't believe where winter is going, we have only got another 10 weeks left in Spain!!!  But can't wait to get back home and spend time with family and friends.  Although have lots of friends here too.  So blessed there.

      Hope you have a lovely weekend.  Glad you got some sun shine.

      Hugs back.

      p.s.  hope you have put orders in for pressies!!!!! cheesygrin

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    • Posted

      Hello Mel! Had a fab weekend! Then for some reason yesterday felt a bit odd! (do you understand that feeling of worrying about becoming anxious, if that makes sense? out of the blue?!). Ok again this morning. Tabs havent completely kicked in I guess? But thats ok. Patience! My partner is feeling a bit down, things like that make me worry I guess...

      It snowed here this morning! It has been really chilly since last week. It looks so pretty. Spain is amazing at this time of the year, so much sun and warmth. Lovely to have Spain and England to go between! 

      Was your weekend good?

      Hope it is sunny and warm there!!!!!

      Hugs to u.xx

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    • Posted

      Hi glad you had a fab weekend.  Mm had a good one but lazy as my body trying to force another period - as having them every two weeks and it ain't happening so quite painful as got lots of adhesions and my ovaries are pumping which in turn makes my pituitary pump bad - so hormonal - but just enjoying feeling quite on a level playing field - if that makes sense.  Tried to do spanish yesterday - just weren't happening as she was speaking to us and we had to write down what she was saying and it was going through the fog first.

      Sorry to hear your partner is feeling down.  The worry bit sounds like the mother in you - if that makes sense.  Us woman hate to feel all is not well in the nest!!

      I would also imagine your brain associates worry with anxiety - which could be playing in your subsconscious.

      It is warm hear but at the moment but quite windy.

      Hugs back Xx

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    • Posted

      Hello Mel. Poor you that sounds rotten for you, but you are coping!!!!!!!!

      It is completely strange... but after my really lovely weekend (spent with my partner and no kids!) I have felt rubbish mostly.

      My partner seems a bit happier but i feel negative like something is just going to go wrong! I think I have said to you before that his house is very loud, teenage boys (he is a single dad) and can be stressy! I hope and pray that after 27 days of 20mg cit a day I am getting there but I seem to be having good days and then bad.. I think I remember it being like this previously but I could do with some positivity..and I thought of you!  Why does my brain feel sooo negative when i feel like this?!!!

      I do hope you are doing well.

      Thanks to you in advance Mel.

      Big hugs. xx

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    • Posted

      Hi there,

      Poor you!!!  The trouble is our hormones can bring us down to feeling so low/tired & stressed and then the negativity creeps in without us even realizing it and starts to take hold and then the hormones lighten up and hey presto we can take on the world - lol.  Well may be.

      Me - well - stressed - my husband is quite low at the moment - but I don't worry as I know what is causing it.  The injections are making our dog really fiesty.  Still not got my period - pain - yuk - and I don't do feeling ill at all well.  One bit of good news though won the legal battle.

      But I can honestly say now my hormones are back on a level playing field can cope.  I try not to think too much or put too much in to my thoughts, know it is hard - but the training so helped teach me this.  Like last night my pituitary was thumbing and I was hyper, but just concentrated on feeling warm and all snuggled up and safe in that warmth and it so helps.

      Been out today, although exhausted, and had a lovely walk along the beach and now feeling quite mellow.

      Have you talked to your doctor about the patches - they soooo help and level that brain chemistry back out and your positivity and dealing with stressy situations. 

      Teenage boys and all that testosterone - mm.

      Hope this helps and you are feeling better today.

      Big hugs.  Mel Xx

      p.s.  keep us updated.

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel.

      Yes i agree... once that negativity starts creeping in there is often no stopping it controlling us and yes next day u can rule the world when u settle down! I have looked over my posts to you and I have had good days...so dare I say that I probably havent levelled out yet (back on Cit for 4 weeks??).

      Have been talking to someone else and the same thing has happened. He thinks it takes some time to get right again because of 'upsetting the apple cart'!

      You say you husband is low..this is it for me.. when my other half is low and I am ok I can handle it like you!!

      Oh hormones hormones!! I dont feel as bad today and trying to be up beat!!!!

      Glad you are doing good, always nice to hear from Mel.

      Hugs xx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Glad you feeling better. 

      If you wish I could teach you about our thought patterns and the negativity that they bring in when feeling low and so they replay again and again in our subconscious. 

      Alot of people don't know this but we can actually change those thought patterns!!!

      They are normally established when we are young and to do with negative experiences and/or false beliefs that are often other peoples fears which they instil in us.

      For example you'll end up just like your aunty - pregnant at 16, was my father's - totally put my off boys!!!  Could run with them at school and I had this guy come up to me at 15 and ask for a kiss as his mates had dared him - horror - i didn't even know how to kiss - lol.

      Glad to say that fear did subside and happily married 2nd time around - however my dad then went on to worry if I was gay lol.  By the way have gay friends, nothing against them and find that they are on the whole very caring people, etc. etc.

      Sounds like you need a girly time - I could do with one and can't wait to get home and see two of my friends that are just a scream - one is a scatty scientist type and reminds me of prof on back to the future and the other used to be a consultant in America (Americian) and is now a minister in England - but she is just a scream - like whoppy goldberg in sister act.

      We don't actually get a lot of time together - but when we do it is a hoot.

      We are going to book rooms next door to each other in a nursing home, when we are elderly, as all have older husbands and have the times of our lifes.

      Hopy you have a good weekend - mine is going to be duvet based as just exhausted from those darn hormones - like you staying up beat and they are not going to be in control!!

      Big hugs and best wishes.

      Mel Xx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel!

      Oh yes I'm very interested in this! It's amazing how powerful the mind is and yes when I have these negative feelings they do go round and round in my head! So annoying ! Have woken not feeling bad but I would like to be able to control these feelings for sure. It must help so much.

      At the moment, as my other half is low (and sometimes grumpy!) im worried world war 3 is going to break out in the house. All males, the boys can be argumentative and in turn my partner gets cross and I just can't deal with the stress (which usually I can! I just ignore).

      Like I said, I had a lovely relaxing weekend last weekend with him and by the Monday afternoon at work, I started feeling anxious again for no reason...it's like I worry about feeling anxious and then I get anxious!!!

      Yes love my girly times with friends and my grown up daughter and I always have a giggle!

      Duvet weekend sounds good. We arent doing much either which is nice. I hope the cit kicks in properly soon!

      Enjoy and take care and thanks as always!

      Xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Woke up with a right wanger of a headache from my pituitary being in overdrive and my ovaries feel like they have been through a meat grinder!!  Unforunately for me they have been in overdrive ever since they kicked in - used to ovulate 4 times a month - hence early menopause.  Couldn't take the pill would bounce off the ceiling with it.  Oh yes and feel sick as a dog - will pass by lunchtime.  Once those darn hormones have subsided.  Know it is back lash from reducing cit - but also it will level out over next couple of months.

      Didn't help my husband being in a right mood yesterday - but hey ho he will get over it!!  Had a good boo hoo and got all those emotions outcry.  That really helped as bottling them up not good for the soul.  Then went round my mates to clear my head last night - that really helped.  Woman to woman - oh understanding.

      Never mind today is another day and the sun is shining.

      I can really help with the thought patterns, but it would mean knowing what is going around and around and getting to the root cause of it - so it is a self discovery - but also you have to explore your thoughts which I can help you do - so if you want to private message me - no probs.   But totally understand if find this difficult.

      Hope you having a good day - me wallowing in my duvet.  Warm and oh so cosy.  Head on pillow - not a care in the world!!

      All my hugs Mel Xx

      p.s.  the art of serenity is being at peace with your thoughts and not fighting them or burying them etc. etc.  When I went through my training we all have lots of thoughts coming and going all day long - but it is the lymbic that is flagging them as dangerous so we need to retrain it by explorative work and laying them to rest. 

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    • Posted

      Hello Mel! Sorry has been a few days I had a busy Sunday and a busy day yesterday.

      Poor you, it is a horrible feeling isnt it?  And yes I expect it does help a little to see the sun everyday! (Its VERY cloudy and chilly here!).

      Feeling a little better, trying to stay upbeat. When I think about it, four weeks back on the CIT isnt that long, not sure if you agree? I think I was very up and down previously at this stage. And because I tried to come off I have obviously have really unbalanced everything? Interested in what you think?

      The thought pattern thing is very interesting. I will private message you when can, I am on a course at work and its full on! I like that we can explore our thoughts etc. And this lymbic thing...I am sure it is quite a difficult thing to do but I would like to give it a try?! Ahhh serenity sounds SO bliss!!

      How are you feeling today?

      Mel as always, THANK YOU!!!!!!

      Lots of hugs to you xx

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    • Posted

      Hi there,

      Good to hear your trying to stay upbeat, it oh so helps.

      I agree 4 weeks is still early days - as with any meds - I know it took six months for HRT to really sort my hormones out and of course yours would have been allowed to come back through more as cit really does surpress them.  So it is a two way thing.  Also seen postings where people have come off and 2nd time took a little longer to get back in - but it will.

      I was doing so well until my ovaries went in to hyper drive and just had to admit defeat and go back to 20 mg as 20 mg is really the maintenance dose and keeps my ovaries at bay - so felt nice and dizzy yesterday, but that's past and today once went for a nice long walk and got all those hormones out of my system feel a lot better -  a good stomp sorted them out.

      Hope the course at work isn't too brain taxing!!!

      Look forward to hearing from you soon.

      Lots of hugs back, Mel Xx

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    • Posted

      Mel!

      The course is good and dare I say... I feel the best that I have felt for a while! Thanks, I think you right. There is no right or wrong timescale, it is different for everyone! ! Of course i realise that i may have a couple of more 'down' days but must remember the days when i feel good and they will become more good than bad!  Definitely postitive, anxiety is much much less!

      How lovely to have a good walk, it certainly is good for anyone's mood?

      I hope you are having a lovely day. Even the gloomy weather cant get me down today!!!!!

      Onwards and upwards and thanks for always cheering me up. You feel like a friend and its lovely!! lol

      xxx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Glad you enjoying the course as I love challenging things and things that stretch my mind it is so good for our sense of achievement, which in it's self really gives us a good positive and keeps us going back for more. 

      My GP said when going through this that I have got far too good a brain just to sit on it even if exhausted through lack of oestrogen.  Good for you girl.

      Good to be hear to talk to you too - love to be your friend - we all need them.  One of the issues our lymbic system has is over trust - when we have had negative experiences - which we all have had - and for lots of people it is learning to trust again. 

      As always big hugs. Xxsmile

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    • Posted

      Hi my friend Mel!

      Yes I agree. New small challenges are good and I am definitely starting to have a 'spring in my step' now if that makes sense. I am not 100% yet but just to feel I am turning the corner is a massive relief! 

      Yes I have always still wanted to get out of bed in the morning and just get on with it as i think although as you say you get exhausted, it is important to try to be in as normal a routine as is possible!

      This lymbic thing is soooo interesting! Yes I agree re trust etc.

      I hope you are well today?

      xx smile

       

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    • Posted

      Hi there my friend Mocheesygrin

      I am good today and so glad you are turning the corner - once you can see some hope - it gives you the get up and go for the next day and the next and the anxiety just slips away along with the hormones quieting down etc etc.  As I found it was a two way thing.

      Take care - you'll soon be back to your old self.

      Xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel!

      Glad you are feeling good, hope that is the same today?

      The anxiety IS slipping away! Its such a great feeling!!!!! Thanks for the support as always!

      Your friend Mo.xx Hugs cheesygrin

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Glad you got that great feeling back.cool

      Me the ovaries are calming down again and did Shaun T - hip hob abs this morning - love a good old dance.  Exercise has always been my coping behaviour (all got one).

      I always used to be a size 10 at 5'8" - always have been since at school - now 12 stone eek.  Nothing can do about it - no amount of exercise - or lack of eating has done any thing and been advised once through menopause will sort itself out.  Oh well husband loves the new full body since hrt my bust has gone from a 34 C to 38 DD!!surprised.

      Your friend n hugs Mel Xx

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    • Posted

      Hi friend Mel!

      Dance is soo good ! Good evercise and 'happy feelings'!

      Mel I'm doing so good!

      U make me laugh re ur weight etc...but ur happy that's totally the main thing ! I just took being happy and 'me' for granted. But it's the most important thing at the end of the day? I'm sure u look great!

      I'm going to inbox u my email address. Hope u have a great weekend !! Xxx hugs to u

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    • Posted

      Hi friend Mo,

      I am so glad your doing good.cool

      My parents philosophy in life is laughter will get you through any thing (the best medicine in life) so woo is me wasn't a thing that was allowed in the house.

      I think I have only seen my mum cry once she is such a happy, content and go lucky person and father is a councillor for his district at 76 and loves challenging things - mind you so does mum.

      She says at 76 she can still get her leg over - that's the gate!!!

      My weight - Mm my husband loves my shape - but the trouble is in my mind I still look like what I used to til I look in the mirror - have to ban them darn things!!!!!

      Hope you have a really great weekend too - is your other half cooking you something scrummy tonight.

      Forgot to say my husband brought up his children too.

      Hugs back Xx 

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel!

      Your parents' philosophy is spot on!  They sound fit and well biggrin. You make me laugh (the gate!).

      Weekend was lovely. We had tapas on Saturday night and a lovely bottle of red! 

      I am doing so good.. when you get to this stage you realise how much easier everything becomes, you can cope better, I am not phased by much at all (including rowdy teenagers and grumpy bosses!).

      How are you?

      Thats lovely that your husband bought up your kids. Not an easy task is it? I have the utmost respect for my other half as he works full time too!

      xxx 

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo!

      Glad you had a lovely weekend and your feeling great.

      I am doing really well too.

      Unfortunately I was never blessed with children - did IVF which hasn't helped me this end of coming up to the menopause - advice from the professor - but I already knew that.  I am not a text book lady and even when they were trying to control my ovaries I ovulated straight on top - so they had to abandon that.

      With my first husband it was just as well as when we split - there was no ties.

      So it was my 2nd husbands children.  Luckily I had a lot to do with them before we got together or even in to a relationship, and in fact his eldest daughter - we are really close - not as mum, but as friends.

      His wife walked out on them and he had to work full time too!.

      My mum and dad - well they are just such good company.  In fact my mum is my best buddy.  We have such screams when we go out. 

      She was doing line dancing up to about a year ago when her knee was giving her too much pain and she had to give it up - she is really hip hop!!!

      Ah well, house work a calling.

      Catch you soon.

      Xx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Melanie, I've just read through the thread of your conversations and I could weep that I've found someone who could be talking about my life. 18mths ago after a horrendous year of drama and trauma I was put on 20mg of citalopram after showing signs of anxiety similar to post traumatic stress. After 10 months things in my life were settling down so I gradually reduced down to eventually coming off them last September. By the end of December I was in bits again. My doctor put me back on 20mg and after 2 weeks of hell I started to feel human again. I am 42 and also on the contraceptive pill " logynon". I feel like a lightbulb has gone off.... I have always been extremely hormonal with heavy periods which was why 6 years ago after my last son was born I went on the pill. It regulated my periods and moods and made my periods lighter. But now I'm wondering about being on it as well as the cit. I feel moody, my boobs are achy and sore, bloated, I'm seriously thinking of coming off them as I'm worrying they could mask peri menopausal symptoms, my mum had a hysterectamy at 40 due to bad periods. Sorry to Twitter on but feel you really get the link between anxiety and hormones! Regards Sara.
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    • Posted

      Hi Sara,

      Poor you.

      Oh boy don't I.  I have done extensive research and found the professor I am under.  I can recommend a really good book - but will have to private message you the name and author on that one - as they won't let you put it in these messages!!  If you would like it is written by a professor in endocrinology and herself has suffered this.

      But I have also done research and training, along with counselling in a drug rehab which is on neuro chemistry, gives you great understanding of how hormones affect the brain!!!!

      As we get older obviously things change and the pill could be imbalancing your hormones more, so agree with you ditching them,   I am on everol conti which is patches and they are brill, a small amount of hormones.  But I don't recommend coming of citalopram as it is that which will helps suppress and keep the hormones at bay.  They are well used for this.  Nobody tells you perimenopausal years can be hell.  But like you not only did a light go off - but I just had no energy to give, couldn't think straight etc. etc.  Lots of woman have breakdowns in these years due to widely fluctuating hormones.

      I know girls who have had those 5 year implants put in and ended up with biopolar symptoms!!.

      Here for you - big hugs.

      Mel Xx

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Mo,

      Just thought drop you a quick line.

      I know you said back along you were going to send your email address - but haven't received any thing - didn't want you thinking I had got it and not replied. 

      Mel xX

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Mel, I couldnt do it yesterday.. will try again right now!

      Hope you are ok today.

      The sun is shining here today, it makes such a difference!!!

      lol

       

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    • Posted

      Oh wow bt 8 weeks to feel the dizziness and sivkness and lack of sleep.i cnt do it.its being a week nw since i stopped it bt im do tired im lazy depreesed and dizxy all the time.i even collapsed.im so worried about my 2 chdren.i need strength fr them.and i cnt cope .i was thinki g to go bk to it as u used to tk 30 mg.dono wat to do.keep going.or go bk and tk thm?😢😢😢
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    • Posted

      Hi Melanie

      Ive just come accross this website as I was researching how to come off citalopram as I'm fed up of not being able lose weight. Plus ive been on it since 2005 after my husband was tragically killed in the Iraq war. I been off it before for two years but then went back on it. I'm on 20mg and was interested to read your article and to find out more about the herbal tea you suggested which may help. I'm going to see my dr tomorrow to start the process. I have read that as ssri's have a short half life of 36hrs it's that which makes it harder to withdraw from and the article suggests going on to fluoxatine first then withdrawing as it has a 4-6 day half life and the withdrawal symptoms are less severe because of this.

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    • Posted

      Melanie someone mentioned a herbal tea, can you tell me which one works best. I'm weaning off the cit going on 2nd week today, anything natural to help with the anxiety I am feeling coming off, I'm guessing that's why I feel the way I do. Any other tips while coming off of cit would be helpful, just chatting with people here does help because they all seem to have the same feelings. Thank you, Cindy
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    • Posted

      Hi i am please to draw strength off what you have explained i have been on Anti depression for Approx 20 years - a while ago started to have  really bad headaches and stomach problems - So my GP told me ot stop straight away a now know that it not a good thing to do 27 days yestesday could not cope went to the hospital was mot inteerested that i felt suicidal told me to visit my GP tomorrow for some different tablets - Crisis spoke to me for a while and told me 28 days is a  long time -and not go back as the worst is over so a drew strength that is can be done how ever hard it can be -29 days today i hope i feel the same tomorrow . Thank you  Sarahdee 

       

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    • Posted

      Hi Sarahdee,

      Congratulations on what you have done that's amazing! I have been on citalopram 20 for 7 months... and some times it feels like 7 years !!! Cause it feels like that long since I've had a proper emotion. I don't feel normal. I cry at stupid things I can't sleep I'm sure I felt better before, and i certainly felt better before i put this weight on!! So after reading your comments I'm definitely thinking about doing the same as you! As I too have a very supportive husband who already hates me taking tablets... so I will keep you all informed because I'm sure I can't feel any worse x

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    • Posted

      It is lovely to hear a successful positive story. How are you now? Ive been on them 10yrs and am 7 stone heavier than I was before I went on them and Im sure they have something to do with my weight gain x
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    • Posted

      Hi!

      You seem very educated on this subject and I'm hoping maybe u could give some advice. Ive been on Cit10 for almost 3 weeks now one a day. I have been feeling great and sometimes I think this medication really saved my marriage. I don't want to get all this damage like everyone is talking about on here and before I started taking Cit I never liked taking any medicine not even for headaches. I hate that I have to rely on this medicine in order to feel normal. But I think I want to try and be normal without it. Do u think I should just go cold turkey?

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    • Posted

      Hi Melanie how did you find out it was hormones I have never been right since starred peri menopause in 2008 and period stopped completely in 2010 I been on citalpram 20 mg at first and diazepam 2 mg daily / I went to 10mg citalpram for a year and had a few good days and thought was ok / I started to ween of this January took 3 months but my heart rate was up a lot and blood pressure doctor said go back on 10mg which I did in May then got put up to 20 mg over a week ago which not good causing funny feeling in body palpitations fast heart beats and it 8 days since started 20mg and take 2 2mg diazepam daily as well I honestly feel like no improvement and will be reducing back to 10mg as I feel that it is hormones and was wondering what would I ask my gp I going tomorrow as really do want to have a good quality of life I have no been able go to work for 6 months and still off so I only worked 3 months in 15 months / and the thought of returning I just not well enough any advice be great I am 55
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    • Posted

      I have done the same as I only started taking them for Powersurges but they seem to make them worse, cold turkey from 10mg 4 days clear feel a bit fuzzy headed but I can cope with that.

      Like you I also need to get the weight off that I put on.

      Well done you smile

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    • Posted

      Hi Rachael, I am just coming off European after 8 years. I came down gradually from 20mgs to 10 mgs. Two weeks ago we went away over weekend and I forgot to take my meds with me and haven't taken them since. 14 days without i feel light headed, palpitations, aching, lazy. Thought I'd check out the side effects and came across this for um. I know it's a while since you posted but did you make it? if you did, How long was it before you felt 'n ormal'?

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    • Posted

      I know that was an accidental .but a bad accident...it could take many months sometimes years ..for those withdrawal to continue...
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    • Posted

      Your suffering from too quick a withdrawal of medication

      No idea how long those feelings wilL last

      I am so paranoid about being without them I actually carry one in my purse in case I get stuck somewhere overnight😂

      Report Reply

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