I had no choice

Calmer - I've just asked missy the same question. I tried to getting melatonin a few years ago but it was script only (in UK ). I'm looking forward to missy 's reply!

All good advice here. Reduce your alcohol consumption and stick with the Mirtazapine. As a guide, I used to drink about 35-40 units per week. The recommended maximum for men is 28 units. 35-40 units is about 3-4 bottles of wine or 10-12 pints of beer. Since early June, I'm down to 8 units per week. I sleep better and lost nearly a stone in weight (about 6 kg). 

Calmer, no worries! You're not far off the mark, I reckon. Whilst not developing full blown alcoholism I was certainly drink dependent for sleep. I stepped off the merry go round 20+years ago and I'm so glad I did. I was definitely heading for major problems. Though at that time I truly believed I needed a drink or 6 to sleep. I know many women who think nothing of sinking a bottle of wine every night to 'relax'. That was me. So I completely understand how Mark is feeling and how difficult it is to change those beliefs. Wishing you success, Mark. We are all routing for you.

Hi Mark,

I have just decided to restart taking Mirt as I did not give it a fair shot. My Gp said to start on 15 and then rise to 30 after a week. I don't think I got passed 4 days worth as I was so afraid of the side effcts.. Drowsiness, dependancy and weight gain. Anyway I too began to fall into the alcohol trap. Often a bottle of wine a night. It definitely made everything worse for just a short term moment of 'Numbness' from my misery. It totally wrecked my digestive system too!

I was diagnosed with Major depressive disorder and it happened mainly as I battled to get over a 'Toxic relationship'. I have had to end it because the person involved has consistenly lied about his intentions for nearly 25 years now and is overcommitted and unavailable; although he can be pratically supportive, he cannot deal with emotional issues. I believe he may have a Borderline Personality Disorder too but refuses to seek help. All in all the relationship has virtually destroyed me. He is beginning to realise that he has narcissistic tendancies and when I discoved and uncovered the lies and deceptions, everything came crashing down.

As i am a carer i don't have a satisfying/typical job during the day to focus on and I am quite isolated. I also have to share my house with my ex husband who is very needy and refuses to move out. A social worker is finally becoming involved now to support me and help be an advocate for him to move on. He also has physical problems but can't access help due to cognitive difficulties so we are in a vicious circle.

I so hoped my other relationship would have worked out and 'rescued' me from all this but it didn't and I now have to come to terms with the loss and get over the last 25 years of failed hope for a normal happy future.

As I am a carer to my son with autism, it is very hard NOT to function each day. Mirt makes me feel drowsy and spaced out at the moment but i know I have to go through this now.

I hope Mirt will help me gain emotional strength back to move on but right now the darkness and hoplessnes are all consuming.

I finally am seeing a therapist but this won't begin properly until 1st October. I just hope I can get by until then.

I also hope my story helps you to not feel alone in this battle with emotional illness and depression. Life is so tough at times.

Plenty of discussion here on drinking, all of which I've been through. For the most part, I've replaced drink with prescription drugs. With regular appointments, my GP monitors my pill routine.

I keep diary recording my drinking. And it has to be an honest record. There's no point kidding yourself or your doctor about your drinking habits. Taking the pills require discipline and routine. I take Concerta XL for my ADHD, olanzapine for the mood swings and manic behviour. Then Mirtzapine just before bedtime to reduce anxiety and help sleep. And most weeks, drinking about 8 units of alcohol, with some drink free weeks.

I've lost weight, I've sleep better and feel better. But you need to put into some work and routine. It's not easy, but it can be rewarding.

And for the record, the ADHD specialist has decided to put me on a wait list leading to an assessment and possible diagnosis for autism. He said he's pretty sure I'm on the spectrum.

I'm not bothered about being autistic and ADHD. It provides explanation and leads to specific help.