I wish I was dead. Tired of living.

God we could be twins, appart that i have plenty of material to use to want to kill myself! how about we become mates? everyday i wake up thinking of all the way i could treeminate this body. 5 min ago, b4 i read ur post, i wanted to hang myself! so u saved my life, well kinda of, because i dont even know how to make a proper “hang urself rope knot”! i also can hide very well my desperate feelingsof not wanting to be alive, but i am still here.i would tell u more now i shall send u a fat veterian 100%lovehug! i need people like me, and maybe u too? im here! 

Unless u have money we r all s**t.end of story

Jahnssteve, so dam true. Your words are exactly what i feel. True that i am natural happy person but tired. I would like to disapeer... Travel to the unknow. Life is beautiful but hard... I am done here...

why did they delete my replies ?? I always try to be positive and 100% honest about all my experiances with all of my psychological problems that brought me to the point of wanting to die.-- 

----  bull****

Moderator comment: I have edited this post due to the swearing. These are open forums so as per the T&Cs please do not use offensive language in posts otherwise they may be deleted.

I am so sorry you are going through this. I can totally relate except the fact that I have a son instead of a daughter. Sometimes I feel as though I have no one too. I have a boyfriend but he’s addicted and my son is very cold and distant with me. I’ve done the best hat I can and it’s just never good enough it seems. I am not trying to feel sorry for myself but sometimes I can’t help it. I feel like I am by myself. I am an elderly care worker and I take very good care of the elderly. They all love me but let’s face it, it’s not like I can have a life with them. I don’t ask for much. All I want is the “normal” things. I want my son to show me he loves me and my boyfriend to have me as a priority instead of the drugs. I’ve heard many times throughout the course of my life had you can’t make sense out of nonsense and I am trying to start thinking that way but of course it’s hard. I’ve been kicked out of therapy because there were times that I was so depressed that I just didn’t go and I guess they felt like I was tying up a spot that someone else can use. What do they expect? I suffer from PTSD and clinical depression. That’s episode was enough to really make you start thinking suicidal thoughts. I don’t know. I believe down deep inside God helps us all and that it shall pass. There has to be something better than this. 

Iwish I was dead too, wish I died in my sleep tonight. I found out one thing for sure, those that want to die keep living and those that want to stay here because they love life and family die.

Been there more than once, jahnsteve. I'm 64 now and still around, so if it's any comfort to you this too shall pass.

But, anyone who has suffered from deep, debilitating depression has been to that point where life seems nothing more than a burden, with ZERO joy. Those are the time you most need the people in your life who you can rely on. If there is ONE thing I've learned over the decades is we all need people in our lives to help us through. No man or women is an island.

I had one breakdown in my life where I was hospitalized for suicidal thoughts-my therapist and wife had me admitted to hospital. I was even arguing with them about it, I was that irrational at that time of my life. Wasn't eating or drinking fluids regularly, sleep deprived, suffering from severe anxiety-I just didn't care anymore. But they took care of me and I've thanked them endlessly since then. Mind you, that was the first time I'd been overnight in a hospital in my life-I never got sick. But even I had a breakdown under those circumstances.

Even today I still have the occasional thought about death appearing attractive. It has to be peaceful, that which most of us lack in our lives. But I recognize there will be an end to the period of depression and anxiety, that the LIGHT will come back in my life eventually. You have to embrace that thought as well.

In the meantime, leverage your friends and family and hold on. This too shall pass. Trust me.

Hey bud.

I get you on every point there. You could have even been writing that about me, lol.

My point is though, that you are not alone, there seems to be loads of us like minded people in this f****d up world!

Its a comfort to me, of sorts, that I am not alone in this way of thinking, but I do sympathise for the sufferers, like yourself.

Every morning, for the past 5 years+, I have woke up and thought/said "I wish I was dead / please God let me die", and stuff to that effect. Lol, and when I look at it, it sounds daft!! And at one point I made a half arsed attempt at suicide, but the thought how it would effect my family partly stopped me. And like you said "I think people would be sad and miss me, but not terribly. They'll get over it. "... And that is probably because (IMO) nobody really gives a st, and thinks of themselves.

And my point to that is, this is what you should maybe do, concentrate on yourself, and do stuff that makes you happy (if possible).

My philosophy is do as you will. so long as it does no harm to any other.

Mix with people you get along with, distance from those you dont.

I am still here. living a st life, but it is better than an awful lot of others.

Be thankful for your blessings, and stick two fingers up to the s**t life throws at you.

Death is an inevitable thing, and all good things are worth waiting for!

Hi jack-it-in and jahnssteve

We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.

If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.

Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.

If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.

Kindest regards

Patient

You poor bugger depression is a dark place. I hope someone helps you and soon.x

I see that your message is 2 years old and i wonder how you are feeling now. I am at the same point in my life. I take anti-depressants but seem to be feeling worse. Mine started with bereavement a d hasnt got much better. Hoping to find people here who have come through the other side and are able to share their wisdom.