Just diagnosed with herpes virus 1- transmission worries

genital area

okay you have gential herpes simplex 2 like me simplex one is on the mouth area

No I was diagnosed with simplex 1. It wasn't transmitted by intercourse.

It was given to me orally as someone who had a cold sore went down on me

It's a different version of the virus

Although it lives in the same area it

Is different

Sorry princess, hsv 1 can be transmitted to the genitals as well. 30% if all genital heroes cases, are from hsv 1. Hsv 2 doesn't really spread to mouth, but has happened in a few rare cases in immune compromised individuals w AIDs

Hey there, the symptoms were present before i met him, before i even lost my virginity.. the doc says they think it is from oral sex.

see thats the thing this is a very new relationship, we have only been together for about a month and i am not at the stage where i am ready to tell him about it as i only found out today and i am only 18.....

i know i will have to tell him eventually but with this all being so new i am confused...

my doctor said that the tablets i am on are meant to make the chances of him getting it 1%.... but i havent found any similar comments to that anywhere else online.

i just dont know what to do.

 

Hey there, the symptoms were present before i met him, before i even lost my virginity.. the doc says they think it is from oral sex.

see thats the thing this is a very new relationship, we have only been together for about a month and i am not at the stage where i am ready to tell him about it as i only found out today and i am only 18.....

i know i will have to tell him eventually but with this all being so new i am confused...

my doctor said that the tablets i am on are meant to make the chances of him getting it 1%.... but i havent found any similar comments to that anywhere else online.

i just dont know what to do.

​

Ok hunny I understand x I think you're right about waiting. Maybe you could drop hints about a friends situation and see how he reacts although that may be different from his response to you as he knows you.read my message and the response from feel broken. This person is brilliant x I had same urge to blurt it out but don't give yourself time to adjust. If u two aren't at the point of intimacy it doesn't matter ok xx get back to me but read it first ok xx I think it will help u a lot xx

Where and what should I be reading sorry?

My experience I posted on here.the only problem is I'm not sure how to send you a link I'm a bit old for this internet lark lol x

https://patient.info/forums/discuss/physical-symptoms-ok-emotionally-a-wreck-how-do-i-deal-with-this-337987

I hope that works xx concentrate on the responses from feel broken after you've read my story x

Thankyou

Reading that definitely helped. I needed to read the part about waiting to tell someone before you know how serious things are

I guess it just feels selfish of me to withhold that information and put them at risk

Even if it is what I want to do for the moment

Thankyou x

I felt exactly the same as you can see x you have done absolutely nothing to "confess" for. You didnt ask for this no one does. It's overwhelming and so hard to deal with emotionally..it's like grieving a lost relative ..but the person you are grieving is the old you you're still that person but now you have a few cold sores down below ... You need to get it out in the open ...so you can be free of the burden ...you don't need to rush in ... You have found this site and you are among others who genuinely care and understand xx I will be here for you no problems x please just enjoy getting to know him for now.give it time xx

It definitely makes me feel guilty for having this secret and not telling the ones closest to me (besides my family) about it.

I just am scared that when I see him I will feel too guilty and push him

Away... Or never be able to hold down a steady relationship all because someone decided

To go down on me when they might've had a cold sore developing and not even known! It's so unfair

To think that now I have to deal with this while they might be completely fine. Sometimes I don't understand life and how people stay strong...

But I guess I've had these

Symptoms for a year now

I lived happily before so I will just have to try to continue and not let the guilt and shame eat me up

Thankyou for letting me vent xxx

If you've already had sex, you need to tell him. If you haven't, wait till the time feels right and you're ready to have sex.

You're doctor is incorrect. You have a chance of passing it to a male using condoms, daily meds and refraining when signs or symptoms are present at about 4-6% and maybe 8% ratio

It is normal to feel guilty. I struggled w that feeling just standing there and speaking to people I owe no explanation about and are nothing more than acquaintances when I first got it. I felt guilty when I was recently dating, but just like I explained yo chastity before; when you start dating someone, you lead w the best foot forward. You don't come out the gate telling them you slept w a bunch of people in the past, that you have a bad credit score, that you are on diabetes meds.. So why do you feel like you are lying or withholding this info when you're just getting to know each other. Let me tell you, please save yourself the heartache of telling aoneone too soon out of guilt, only to shortly learn you don't like them and you went through unnecessary stress and embarrassement of "The talk". Trust me.. I was just dating someone and it was killing me after two weeks not to say something.. Then by 3 weeks, I realized he was no Good for me and ended things. Could you imagine if I put myself through unnecessary hurt and rejection, to only to realize I don't want him?

So cut yourself some slack. It is normal for your mind to rationalize your diagnosis as well and hope it is something else. You'll be OK huh, I promise. We're all here for you

It's ok hunny x venting helps us come to terms with it x no matter how trivial you think others may find it if it's a big deal or upsetting to you then it's important and needs to be said x you have no reason to feel ashamed. Why should you feel guilty? You haven't intentionally caught herpes.why punish yourself with guilt at something you had no control over?. Using a condom wouldn't have protected you... There is enough information out there on herpes but it's not talked about because it's "dirty" . You're probably like me and hundreds of others that were totally ignorant about it til I got diagnosed x don't blurt it out . I know it's hard but like feel broken said you have no choice if you've already been intimate xx

It's ok to vent. You are strong ...you're facing this head on. You're trying to understand how this affects you and others you care about .

Soz again for short replies ... X what you're going through is normal. I'm sure hundreds of people go through a meltdown...world has ended ..life's over every day because of this diagnosis.we only feel ashamed because society has said herpes is bad ..we mustnt talk about it and so because it's hush hush you only find out about it when you have symptoms and get diagnosed

i am just concerned about my future relationships and my current one... as im only 18. i guess it just seems like such a deal breaker....i dont feel like anyone aorund my age group would really accept it for what it is and want to involve themselves in it and put themselves at risk.

I dont want my love life to revolve around something so out of my control i cant help but think why me.

also, a question.

What do you do to treat your outbreaks? is there anything you put on? oitment/cream? salt baths?

just because i was given a hydrocortisone/steriod cream for this before they realised what it was... it did relieve it previously... but should i stop it.

I really was told nothing besides this is what you have, its incurable, have a good day.

 

When I have obs, I take a bath w Epsom salt and 3000mlgs of lysine a day. It is a supplement you can find at your local drug store. Eating pineapple daily and taking 3xs the daily dose of vitamin c has helped me.

I use the same cream if I'm itching from herpes, because it helps to relieve symptoms. It is OK to continue using.

I understand how you feel about relationships, we all are battling w the same fear and worry of that. However, I can tell you that I have multiple gfs in my life who have it and are all married now or in relationship. Only one has ever been rejected. If you educate them well on it, explain the risks are minimal w being on daily suppressive therapy and using condoms and abstaining during obs, most will accept it. I obsessed over what yiu did and finally realized it did me no good really. I'm worrying about something in the future that has yet to come yet and already predicting an outcome that I really don't know what it is yet. It's like putting the cart before the horse. Worry about that till you get to the moment of actually informing someone of your status and not a day earlier. You are just setting yourself up for unnecessary stress on things you have zero control over.

Lafai, I am in the exact same position!! I am 18 too and found out I had hsv when I was 17. It's so scary and when I first found out I couldn't even face my friends because I felt so horrible. I'm still so worried about future relationships and whenever I like a guy or someone shows interest in me I panick and just end things before anything can happen.

I definitely think people our age will be less likely to take it well. Before I was diagnosed I barely knew anything about herpes so i assume most people still don't know much about it. 

It's so horrible to have this virus constantly in the back of your mind  

I actually disagree. When you're as young as you two, people are not bitter and jaded by broken hearts and the scars of life. when you guys fall in love, you go full force and don't pick each other apart. When you're in your 30s and older, men fear and complain about womens baggage all the time. So they are now less tolerant, because by that age you come w baggage as is and they don't want to deal w more than they have to. I think if you guys educate yourselves and confidently inform them, they'll be more accepting. People your guys age, especially men think they're invisible. Guys in their 30s & 40s worry about your health issues, because they're thinking about having to take care of you when you age. Yeah.. So romantic right? These are things people in their 20s don't worry about