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Perimenopause panic

Posted , 18 users are following.

trinity03
trinity03

I'll be 43 very soon, and I've been experiencing what I think are perimenopause symptoms since December and it's been torturous. Some symptoms have improved since starting an SSRI anti-anxiety med, but the physical symptoms remain.

Symptoms:

Overwhelming dread, fear, panic, frustration, anger, and sadness. I had NO appetite and barely ate.

EVERYTHING overwhelmed me. Just the thought of having to make dinner sent me into a panic-y meltdown. I had bills to pay, but just couldn't leave to go pay them. Thank God for online bill pay!

*This all started right before Christmas, so obligations were more frequent and I had to hold it together as best I could. 

The day after Christmas I shut down.

I could barely get out of bed and just laid there sobbing, shaking, and physically in pain. I felt adrenaline CONSTANTLY coursing through my veins and had to keep moving to "burn it off".

I lost about 7 pounds 3 weeks and it doesn't sound like much, but I'm already small and the weight loss was very noticeable and concerning. I'd fall asleep fine but wake up with heart palpitations and racing pulse, several times a night. I almost went to the ER several times.

For about a month I thought I was dying.

I was-and still am experiencing:

random muscle cramping, muscle spasms, tendon and joint pain, skin tingling, itching, blurry vision, jitters, buzzing and internal vibrations when sitting still and trying to sleep, and fibrocystic breast pain.

* I saw my doctor a few weeks after this started and it wall all chalked up to my untreated anxiety disorder, which made sense. So, I've been taking generic Lexapro and it's cleared my head and helped me focus. I haven't had any bouts of crying and despair, BUT the physical symptoms are just as prevalent and leading me to believe I'm starting perimenopause. My aunt told me that "the change" starts early on that side of the family and that she started in her late 30s. My mom had a hysterectomy at 22, so I couldn't use her as a reference. 

My period last month was a week early, I'm starting to find long, fine hairs on my jawline. My breasts look like deflated balloons, and I haven't had a libido for over a year.

I also had 2 hot flashes last week.

I'm seeing my gynecologist on Thursday and hopefully she can give me some insight to this.

*Sorry this is so long. I needed to vent and find some kind of camaraderie in all this. I am just so over these muscle spasms and internal buzzing. I want my life back and to feel "normal" again.

 

2 likes, 49 replies

49 Replies

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  • rebecca250766
    rebecca250766 trinity03

    Posted

    Wow. That sounds awful. I feel like a fraud? I had posted asking if ladies with PMDD had any advice going into menopause. I took Prozac for the 2 weeks prior to my periods and was cured. Didn't feel any PMDD symptoms or menopausal symptoms.

    THEN the sh** hit tbe fan when I was stressed and overloaded at work. My children had left home and my marriage (thankfully) ended. I also had a tsunami of deaths to deal with.

    I CRASHED. I couldn't even make a cup of tea. Sobbing all the time. I would got to sleep and wake up feeling panic. My whole body felt lime lead. Heavy. Shock.

    Ladies. We are are all very different and unique as I've already posted. But the common natural supplements are:-

    Maca powder

    Milled flaxseed or capsules

    Magnesium with but D3

    Valarian for the panic/anxiety.

    The rest is boring.

    Good diet . Exercise. Leafy green veg.

    Mindfulness.

    Read Caroline Foran's book. "Owning it" you can get it on kindle for a couple of euro/dollars..yen...

    She explains everything so well.

    Trinity. Look at the/Google the graph on cortisol/melanin

    We release cortisol in the morning naturally. BUT if we are stressed we have more. Hence the trembling . Electric. Buzzing. Fuzziness. Not to forget the panic.

    My episode was triggered by work.

    I'm 5 weeks off work now and am working HARD to get back on track.

    We are bad at looking after ourselves.

    Read widely. Inform. Educate yourselves. I'm doing so much better. The flax is key. I'm sure of it. Maca used by Peruvians for millennia.

    I hope this helps. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

    • rebecca250766
      rebecca250766

      Posted

      Oh sorry girls. Predictive text errors there. Vit D3. The rest is fathomable!!!
    • trinity03
      trinity03 rebecca250766

      Posted

      Thanks so much for the information. I've been searching for books at our local library to get the best information from the experts. 

      I'll also have to figure out what supplements won't interfere with my meds. 

      This is a whole new world that I'm grossly unprepared for. 

      Thanks again!

  • trinity03
    trinity03

    Posted

    I'm wondering if any of you who are experiencing or have experienced Perimenopause have really bad ligament or tendon pain in your feet.

    Years ago when I was pregnant, one of the worst symptoms was when ligaments started stretching and the tendons/ligaments on the bottom of my feet were so painful I could barely walk.

    It felt, and now again, feels like being stabbed in the arch of my foot and even my toes.

  • trinity03
    trinity03

    Posted

     I apologize, but this is all so new to me, and like I said earlier, seems to have come on fast and furiously.

    Anyway, another question-

    Has anyone developed seriously dark and puffy under eye circles?? 

    I have naturally deep set eyes, and now with the puffiness and darkness, look like a pugilist in training sad

  • gailannie
    gailannie trinity03

    Posted

    Go get your thyroid checked also.  
    • trinity03
      trinity03 gailannie

      Posted

      I did about a year ago and everything checked out normal. Although I suppose it couldn't hurt to have it checked again.

    • tina00239
      tina00239 trinity03

      Posted

      It could also be adrenal gland exaustion. I have dark puffy bags under both my eyes and I do have adrenal issues so you might want to get a test for that. XXX
  • michelle20025
    michelle20025 trinity03

    Posted

    I'm 39, turning 40 this year, and have had perimenopausal symptoms for the past 4 months. It's been a roller coaster and right now it feels like I'm in hell! It started with palpitations, then sleeplessness which I still have until now, moodiness, depression, night sweats.

    The worst for me are the not being able to sleep at night, which affects my whole day, and the depression. I find it's particularly bad the weeks before my period. Last month I thought I was getting better, was sleeping more, was not feeling sad and on edge, and then one day this month I couldn't fall asleep and felt miserable all over again!

    I just want this to stop. I've not been myself and feel like I can't live life anymore. I have a husband and 5 year old son and feel so bad I can't enjoy life with them. My mother had these symptoms (minus the sleeplessness) when she was 44 or 45 but they stopped after 4 months. How long will I have to live like this? 

    I feel your pain, trinity. It's the not knowing how long this feeling will last that's also horrible. 

    • kelle34850
      kelle34850 michelle20025

      Posted

      I am 41 and have been going through the same thing for 7 months. I HATE It! I want to feel like my old self again.
    • michelle20025
      michelle20025 kelle34850

      Posted

      I would do literally anything to feel good again. Anything! Why does it feel like my hormones are killing me? Today was a particularly bad day with my depression. And I am usually a person who's almost never depressed! 

    • trinity03
      trinity03 michelle20025

      Posted

      I just saw my midwife a few days ago and vented to her about everything. She was great. Just sat quietly and let me babble. She's nearly 60 so she KNOWS smile 

      She reassured me that, although perimenopause symptoms are horrible and potentially last for years before actual menopause, they DO plateau. She said things will ease up and get "easier", but just be prepared for another dip. It goes up and down until you hit the big M. smile  I did find that somewhat encouraging and hope you do too.

    • trinity03
      trinity03 kelle34850

      Posted

      Isn't it bizarre how drastically it changes us? I never knew this happened so early in life. I always thought it was something that started in our 60s. I have such a newfound respect for other older women. smile

    • michelle20025
      michelle20025 trinity03

      Posted

      I know, I have such a newfound respect for my mom too, who went through peri and menopause without complaining to us, her own family! I have a meltdown every day because of this. I do hope it plateaus soon. I guess I should say I've "only" been feeling bad for 3 months, but I can't take it anymore.

    • trinity03
      trinity03 michelle20025

      Posted

      Some days I feel so overwhelmed by all the changes it makes me want to curl up and hide forever. But, we CAN do this. We HAVE to. Just set your mind to know and believe that you CAN and you WILL. Don't forget to do things you enjoy-things for you that make you happy and content.

      Also, as a recommendation from my midwife, I started take a D3 supplement to help with moods a bit. I live in the Pacific northwest and sunshine is a novelty. Years ago when I lived in the midwest I was tested and it was SUPER low, so I took D3. I can't imagine how low it is now with it being winter in the PNW. I don't really know why I stopped taking D3. Anyway, you can do this. You're not alone smile

    • gailannie
      gailannie michelle20025

      Posted

      Michelle, your mom was smarter than I am.  I tried to talk with my adult daughter and she blows me off.  I guess I was hoping that if she heard some of this from me, it wouldn't shock her so badly when she experienced it herself.  She wants nothing of this.  LOL

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