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Shaking and crying!

Posted , 10 users are following.

pamela30172
pamela30172

Hi everyone

i have read so very many posts on re starting and sticking out on Citralopam and battling through the side effects and it has helped me to stay determined to try to just tough it out!

I started taking Citralopam 13 days ago .....10 mg for 5 days then went up to 20 mg.

Before this I had been on Dosulepin for around a month and a half....but as the GP thought this wasn't helping he changed me onto Cit.

I have only had a couple of times in my adult life where I have had episodes of depression/anxiety but they were easier to account for as to the cause/ reason.....this time everything seems to have come out of the blue and it's completely floored me!!

I have a loving husband of 35 years and two fabulous sons...and a family all of who are supportive and loving....I am one very lucky lady!

That's why it makes it so hard to understand where all these 'yukky' feelings have come from??!!

i am also trying CBT ...another first for me!

My question to you all is.....every morning I wake up around 5am feeling sick VERY shaky and VERY weepy....to the point of sobbing for quite a while!

After the sobbing subsides the shaking continues to a lesser degree all day...it's such a horrid disturbing feeling!

Has anyone else experienced the same? .....and better still can some one reassure me that after the 'magic' amount of weeks when the tabs start to kick in it will stop??

I am finding it so hard to cope with!

Thank you for listening to my rant.....any words of advice would be gratefully received.....like everyone else on here I just want 'me' back again and at the mo can't imagine getting there!

 

1 like, 76 replies

76 Replies

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  • susan29129
    susan29129 pamela30172

    Posted

    Hi Pamela you are experiencing exactly what I am and I could have written it myself. I started 10mg had it for 4 weeks and started 20mg this week and couldn't go to work today I set off got half way  and came home after having a massive panic attack my legs were shaking and I felt dizzy, usual feeling.  I get better as the day goes on and should be going to Portugal this weekend but can't go for fear of how I will feel. I am not depressed just anxious it is a nightmare . I keep thinking I'll be getting better soon but it hasn't happened yet and it's terrible waiting I like you are normally happy with the stress in the background but it's got hold of me know. Fingers crossed  hopeful after all these  comments . Take care Sx 
    • pamela30172
      pamela30172 susan29129

      Posted

      Hi Susan

      Its so horrible isn't it?!

      i have never cried as much in my whole life.....I didn't know I could produce so many tears and sob so hard!

      the shaking never stops all day but is worst in the morning.

      sounds like you're a couple of weeks in front of me so hopefully you SHOULD start feeling the benefits soon....I hope it's soon for you!

      it will be nice to follow your progress and have someone to compare the 'journey' with

      sorry to hear you have had to cancel your trip....that's sad 

      I hope you get to go when you're feeling better....you will enjoy it more then!

      i am finding that even things I would normally love to do are a trial at the moment and have promised myself....and my lovely hubby...that I will live it up big time once I've got rid of this nasty 'infliction'

      lets stay strong together and as Gill said.....smack this in the face...POW!!!

      Sending positivity 

      Pamela x

    • susan29129
      susan29129 pamela30172

      Posted

      Totally agree, yes let's stay positive and get well together. I am really confident it will come right everyone keeps telling me so and I believe them just waiting to get there is the problem.  I too have a fab husband and family and want it get better to enjoy my life with them . Good luck Sx
  • pamela30172
    pamela30172

    Posted

    Well it's day 24!

    Im glad to report (hope I'm not tempting fate here?!) that over the last 4 days I have been feeling much more cheery.....and I haven't cried!!! Wow.....I really thought that was going on forever....think I've cried a river as the saying goes!

    I am so much calmer and not waking up with a jolt of anxiousness.......and the nausea has passed...phew! 

    The ONLY thing to go yet is the shaking again which is much better but still hanging around......if that would go it would be such a relief ....I really find it disturbing!

    The Doc has given me Propanolol which I'm taking 2 x 10 mg twice a day

    It seems to be helping but I would like it to stop all together.....perhaps I'm asking for too much too soon?!

    Anyway to everyone who has given me support I would like to say a big thank you......this forum is just full of brilliant caring people!

    Heres to a full recovery to all of anxious free happy days! 👍😍

    Pamela x

    • elizabeth00077
      elizabeth00077 pamela30172

      Posted

      So pleased for you Pamala!! I knew things would brighten up for you. 

      I'm pleased to report that the majority of my side effects have sub sided too and I feel MUCH more positive - even enjoying the Tour de France that passed through my town of Masham in Yorkshire on Saturday, something I couldn't imagine doing 6 months ago! Wow what a journey so far!! 

      So..... I'll meet you at the top of that mountain and we can enjoy that view together, with champagne of course!!! :-)

      Liz xxxx

    • pamela30172
      pamela30172 elizabeth00077

      Posted

      Hi Elizabeth 😊

      YEAH!!!! How good are we......battlers victorious! 👍

      Just the last fight for me to win now....the shaking....then running to that mountain....whooooosh!

      Glad you enjoyed TDF .......we didn't go but my son and his partner were in Skipton with there new buisness a Citeron H van catering coffee cakes and other goodies all weekend and it was a roaring success 

      One of my brothers has a caravan in Leyburn and watched it from there

      How lucky were they with the weather!!

      Nice to hear from you Elizabeth and so glad you're doing well 👍

      Stay well and happy 

      Pamela x

  • pamela30172
    pamela30172

    Posted

    It's 21 days of taking 20mg and 5 before that of 10mg and I'm glad to report that things are so very much better!

    i can now wake up without feeling wired sick and sobbing....I just feel far more normal and relaxed!

    My days are getting back to my 'normal' and that's all I hoped for

    Just a slight shakiness to get rid of but apart from that I seem to have banished the dithering anxious wreck of a woman who had taken over my body.....and I'm going to make sure she doesn't attack me again 👊

    To all of you still battling or just starting on the Cit journey.....keep at it don't give in...you will get there and believe me it's a fabulous relief when you do!!

    Wishing each and very one of you success and a return to happiness!

    Pamela x

    • susan29129
      susan29129 pamela30172

      Posted

      Hi Pamela I'm so happy you have improved I had 4 weeks on 10 then 3 weeks on 20 and I too have seen the light. I am also having acupuncture which seems to be helping too. I am a little nervous of being on my own and still think I could panic whilst driving  but am lots lots better.  Anyone new reading this please believe it does help I had every side effect going and my tummy has just settled down after 7 weeks. I think the GP should say realistically the actual time it takes to work I was under the illusion it worked straight away but one GP said 6-8

      weeks which I think is true for most people . Take care everyone and be patient it really does work lots of lov Sx 

    • pamela30172
      pamela30172 susan29129

      Posted

      Brilliant news Susan.....onwards and upwards from here on in and no looking back! It's our life to LIVE and we must take control and stay strong and positive.....the road ahead is now clear...let's cruise and enjoy the journey ahead! 

      Stay happy xx

  • pamela30172
    pamela30172

    Posted

    Well !! .......back to my original post...and felling today like I've slipped right back to where I was when I wrote it ! 😞

    After a brilliant couple of weeks where I had actually begun to forget just what it felt like I have woken up today after hubby left for work at 6am with that horrible familiar angst ......jittery and worse still the sobbing has hit me again!

    Im so disapointed after having felt so well......arghhhhh!!!

    I did on Saturday have an upset tum and took quite a few meds throughout the weekend including a couple of zopiclone sleeping tabs.....so am wondering if maybe this has something to do with it?!

    I am now drinking lots of water to try to flush out my system so to speak

    Hoping this is just a blip and I can soon return to what was my cheery more normal me again soon 🙏

    Hope all of you are doing well 

    Pamela x

    • pamela84726
      pamela84726 pamela30172

      Posted

      Hi Pamela, 

      I too am Pamela, how odd is that? I rarely come across anyone with the same name. 

      I was really glad to read you were doing better on the Cit, but am saddened by your re-lapse. 

      Hang in there, this is only a speed bump along the road. It will get better again. 

      I am on day 6 and having a tough go of it, I have however been on this before and know it works. Hold on to the positive thoughts, you will be feeling better again in no time. 

      Cheers

      Pam

  • vivienne19443
    vivienne19443 pamela30172

    Posted

    Hi Pamela

    I am going through the same thing I suffered anxiety and panic attacks years ago about 20 years and then went on citramil 10years ago. It was brilliant Came off it gradually and Panic free from 20006 until 2014 Just out of nowhere wole up in the middle of the night with rapid palpitations and creepy crawly burning sensation in the arms also shaky and trembly. I am back on ciptamil again and just finished 2 weeks of 10mg and today went up to 20 mg The problem is it worked for me when I was younger now in my 60's and it seems to be taking its time to work. I have heightened anxiety and most unpleasant . I just have to ride the storm. Anyone else in my boat?

    • pamela84726
      pamela84726 vivienne19443

      Posted

      Hi Vivienne, 

      I'm in a similar situation. Was on venlafaxine (Effexor) for 8 years and successfully came off it. 2 years later in the throws of perimenopause my anxiety levels have gone sky high. 

      I have just started Cit, 6 days ago and am having a rough time of it. I was on cit before Effexor and I don't remember it being this awful at start up. 

      Stick with it, I think we both know it works, it's just going to take time for our brains to be happy with this stuff. 

      Cheers, Pam x

    • vivienne19443
      vivienne19443 pamela84726

      Posted

      Hi Pam 

      just wondered how things are going for you now? I have just had a panic night last night after thinking I was improving but tonight will take a diazepam to help me have a good nights sleep We just have to try and keep soldiering on Like you can't remember the meds taking this long to work 

      take care and keep improving VivxxVivxx

    • The_sleepy_crow
      The_sleepy_crow vivienne19443

      Posted

      Hey Vivienne

      sorry to hear that you had a panic attack last night - it is tough having a very active nervous system. I am sure that you are improving day by day - don't let that panic attack get you down. The important thing is that you survived the panic attack and that you are strong. Panic attacks Are awful - but we need to stand up to them. Try abdominal breathing to help you remain calm during an attack. Try some self-talk as well. I am struggling to leave my home & drive my car. Today I was in pieces because I had to drive for 5 mins - I was so apprehensive. It the car- I spoke to myself in a firm voice 'you can do this, you know you can do this, I have the willpower, I will see this through'. I did it! It wasn't easy, but I feel a lot better with myself for trying my best. That is all we have to do each day - do the best you can. Your inner strength is there.

      take it easy viv & hope you manage to get a decent sleep tonight

      sleepy crow

       

    • vivienne19443
      vivienne19443 The_sleepy_crow

      Posted

      Hi sleepy crow

      Thank you so much for replying to my last post. I have been reading your comments to Pamela and you give such wonderful support and advice you are areal rock. Last night I woke again with at 4.00am with the dreaded palpitations but did what you suggested with the abdominal breathing and it worked although couldn't get back into a deep sleep. Had to get up and see my daughter off to school and drive my adult son to the station he is at Uni and daughter year 11 so I have to be strong for them. my husband is supportive but away 3-5 days a week as he flies with Qantas. Anyway resolved today to just read one chapter per day of Coping with Anixiety book and try their progressive relaxation techniques and try to eat healthily because this might help me get through the readjustment period I am very pleased to hear that you managed to drive yesterday I am in the same position next Tuesday I have to pick my son up. From his Prac teaching school and take him to the Dentist He doesn't have a licence yet . He has Aspergers and not ready to take on that skill Your comments are so encouraging so I will do what you did and give myself positive affirmations 

      thank you again for your kind support Viv

    • The_sleepy_crow
      The_sleepy_crow vivienne19443

      Posted

      Hi Viv

      how are you doing?

      I do hope you are coping fine. Just wanted you to know that I have been thinking about you and hope that life is treating you kindly.

      i had a CBT appointment last week - it was a good meeting and my coach give me some useful handouts. I will send you some links tomorrow so that you can view the material.

      take care Viv

      sleepy crow x

       

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